Korean Job Discussion Forums

[MESL]

KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF ME !

Mr. Kim,

You have put your hands on me many times. A long time ago, I suspected this was sexual, but I waited to see if it might be your personality or Korean culture. It has happened so many times, there is obviously an explanation besides your personality or Korean culture. Viewed individually, each situation seems innocent. But you constantly find reasons to put your hands on me. Collectively, these situations form a clear pattern.

After you touched me enough times, I started noticing whether you treat other employees this way. You have 5 Korean men on staff, 7 Korean women, 3 foreign men, and one foreign woman. You don�t put your hands on any of them near as often or as fondly as you put your hands on me. Also, other Korean men don�t put their hands on me as often as you put your hands on me or as fondly as you put your hands on me. Nor have I ever put my hands on you.

At the retreat, you stood behind me, put your arms over me, and squeezed my *beep*. I pulled your hands off me, but you did it again, so I told you to stop. After the retreat, before a staff meeting, I told you I was sick. You started putting your hands on me again. First you put your hands on my forehead. When you tried to put your hands on my chest, I pushed your hands away and said, �You�re not a doctor.� But you tried to put your hands on my chest again. So I pushed your hands away again and said again, �You�re not a doctor.� After the staff meeting, you stood behind me while I was talking to another teacher, reached around me, and put your hand on the left side of my stomach. But I pushed your hand away and continued talking to the teacher. Then you reached around me again and put your hand on the right side of my stomach, so I pushed your hand away again. Now what are you going to accomplish by putting your hands all over a sick person if you�re not a trained medical professional? Do you put your hands all over every sick employee?

At the retreat, you expressed curiosity about my clothes, asked me several questions about my clothes, and touched my clothes. You didn�t express curiosity about anyone else�s clothes, you didn�t ask anyone else several questions about their clothes, and you didn�t touch anyone else�s clothes. The topic was the number of pockets in my shorts. Surely you have seen many men wearing shorts with a lot of pockets. On Friday, you reached into my bag of chips. On Saturday, you reached into my can of peanuts. Other people ate snacks at the retreat, but you didn�t eat out of their bags or cans. When the meals started, you offered me food. When the meals were finished, you asked me if I had eaten enough. You did not offer food to any of the other employees or ask any of the other employees if they had eaten enough, even though one of them is skinny enough to look almost anorexic. In English, we call these things �circumstantial evidence.� But in the context of the other situations, I don�t think any of these things were coincidence.

This situation has gone far enough. Here are some English terms you need to have translated: sexual harassment, fondled, molested, groped, taking liberties. If you touch me again, you�ll be looking for another teacher. If you try to retaliate against me for leaving, I will send a copy of this letter to the police, the Labor Board, Immigration, the owner of YBM, and the Korea Times.

[ I need to add that Mr. Kim has never asked me to have sex with him. He�s never even mentioned the topic of sex during a conversation with me. He�s never taken me to a restaurant alone, never invited me to his house, etc. And of course, all of this is his word against mine. However, when all the male teachers went to Pizza Hut, we discovered that 3 of us had similar experiences with Mr. Kim's hands to one degree or another. The fourth male teacher was spared because he arrived about the time Mrs. Kang told Mr. Kim, "I'm not impressed with the way you've been running the school. Stay home." I was on the verge of giving Mr. Kim this letter about that time also. Read the rest of the story, which is far from over, at the link below. ]

http://www.eslcafe.com/forums/korea/viewtopic.php?p=1019946#1019946

[spliff]

[Yu_Bum_suk]

Yes, isn't Korean culture ever grand? So polite and respectful to foreigners.

[OiGirl]

It's so hard to tell with some Korean men: are they hitting on you, do they truly not understand, or are they Asperger's-like-socially-challenged???

That said, I think your case is pretty clear-cut.

[tzechuk]

I am confused.

Is the OP a male or a female?

[Darkness]

"or your from Nova Scotia"



LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Ya-ta Boy]

Yes, it is not exactly clear which gender the OP is, but then it doesn't really make any difference. Unwanted touching is unwanted touching.

[Homer]

Yum....before you go and buy the OP hook, line sinker and bait please take the time ti re-read the post and then consider it for what it actually is....

Come on, you are smarter than this man.

[Smurfette]

[Ya-ta Boy]

[supernaut]

[bosintang]

[Ramones]

I'm kinda lost also. The op is a man, yes? Is he gay? Is mr Kim wanting a little New York Style Greenwhich Village man-to-man love? Can't the op defend himself?

I'm not gay - not that there is anything wrong with being gay - but if a man hit on me i would say no thanks HomeBoy, ain't my thing, you got a little sister perhaps?

Op has to be firm with this guy and defend himself. or invite mr Kim over one night and show him what Loraina Bobbit did to John....

[trinity24651]

MESL - I am sorry that you're having to go thru this. I've been there...done that - so I know how you feel.

Good luck.

[Apple Scruff]

MESL is officially a whiney lunatic with way too much time on his hands. Get the *beep* out of Korea already, you tool. You must be a joy to work with.