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William Beckerson Guest
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Posted: Fri Nov 14, 2003 8:33 am Post subject: |
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| I never had any problems going out to a dinner with the office. Everyone chats and enjoys themselves. |
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SweetBear

Joined: 18 May 2003
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Posted: Fri Nov 14, 2003 2:57 pm Post subject: |
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I can sympathise with the OP. His boss EXPECTS him to go out with them all. He is the ONLY foreigner. I would feel cornered. I think as time goes on it's just gonna irritate you more unless you make a polite stand, at least on ocassion.
Sb |
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The Man known as The Man

Joined: 29 Mar 2003 Location: 3 cheers for Ted Haggard oh yeah!
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Posted: Fri Nov 14, 2003 3:02 pm Post subject: |
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| Are you that introverted? Go out and have some fun, and it makes your boss happy-unless he insists on burning a hole in your stomach with the soju, and he's a major richard, the problem is you, mate. |
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peppermint

Joined: 13 May 2003 Location: traversing the minefields of caddishness.
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Posted: Fri Nov 14, 2003 3:29 pm Post subject: |
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| A lot of my co-workers are friends at my current job, and I've got zero problem hanging out with them. These work dinners are a different matter though. Everybody is on best behaviour, the boss is watching- its as far from a relaxing Friday night as possible. No one wants to be the first to leave, because then they are singled out by the boss. |
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Mr. Pink

Joined: 21 Oct 2003 Location: China
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Posted: Fri Nov 14, 2003 4:07 pm Post subject: |
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I'll I can say is I wish we had that going on once a month at my work. Since we are always SO busy during work hours, it would be nice to actually get to know some of my coworkers more than asking them work related stuff.
I'd say you are lucky. Two hours of free food, booze and making relations better versus what? A nap at home before you hit the bars? And once a month...have I made my point I am envious!!! Stop complaining and enjoy what others don't get to enjoy!!! |
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hadeshorn

Joined: 30 Jul 2003
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Posted: Fri Nov 14, 2003 5:21 pm Post subject: |
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| Arthur Fonzerelli wrote: |
| hadeshorn wrote: |
I usually organise after work dinners. But im beginning to regret going. It is always more Koreans then us.
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I have news for you.....YOU'RE IN KOREA...NOT SASKATECHWAN.... |
Sorry I should have made myself clearer. I also invite the foreign teachers as well but they all usually decline to come. Making me the only foreigner there. So now the koreans are stuck with one foreigner and are then forced to speak a lot more english to involve me in conversations when the majority of them just want to natter on with Korean. I keep telling them that I dont mind if they talk in Korean because after a long day, these teachers dont want to speak english more then they have to. |
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Squid

Joined: 25 Jul 2003 Location: Sunny Anyang
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Posted: Sat Nov 15, 2003 12:59 am Post subject: |
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I enjoy a god working relationship with the Wongjangnim and the rest of the staff so their invitations come about once a week. On top of that my students and I go out once a month.
I enjoy a bit of a social life with them, they're nice people. |
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crazylemongirl

Joined: 23 Mar 2003 Location: almost there...
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Posted: Sat Nov 15, 2003 6:58 am Post subject: |
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I just came from dinner with some of my co-workers (korean and waygookin). We hang out a lot, and generally go out for drink at least once a week.
As for dinner with the boss, that doesn't happen often as she is cheap. However it's generally one half of the table is having R rated conversations while the boss is talking korean down the other end of the table.
CLG |
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Juggertha

Joined: 27 May 2003 Location: Anyang, Korea
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Posted: Sat Nov 15, 2003 8:39 am Post subject: |
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| yeah, at first I felt uncomfortable with it.. now i'm the one doing the inviting. lmao |
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maxxx_power

Joined: 17 Mar 2003 Location: BWAHAHAHAHA! I'M FREE!!!!!!!
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Posted: Sat Nov 15, 2003 4:10 pm Post subject: |
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I equate my job with working at a Walmart or Kinko's Copies, social interaction outside of work is not acceptable (just my personal opinion). I really have no emotional investment in a school where I will only spend one year, I do my job and leave at the end of the day.
Koreans seem to have a competely alien (to me) view of management/employee relations. They expect loyalty and feel as if they own the workers as their personal property. I think these dinners are a way the Lords manipulate their peasants into somehow feeling attached/dependent (?) on them. Whereas in America, everyone realizes that there is business and their are social relationships, they intertwine at company picnics maybe once a year where everyone stays in their own circles. Who wants to hang out with their work buddies all the time?
This is why you never dip your pen in company ink and date a coworker. You grow to resent them because you can never get away for some peace. "Give us free!" (Amistad, the movie)
You work with these people, see them 5 days a week, and interact on a daily basis. There is no reason to spend precious free time in what becomes an extension of work. It amounts to the owner trying to instill some pseudo loyalty in the company, even though I find that everyone would rather just go home and be with their families/ps2.
When my boss asked me to come out to dinner with the workers I agreed the FIRST time, when I was a new teacher there.
After that I have refused every time, saying that I do not mix work with pleasure (am I being too American?). The boss understands and even confessed to me that she would rather go home too, I said good, go home and enjoy yourself, we see enough of each other anyways.
Sometimes these "dinners" turn into free English lessons for the kids or the spouse of the owner (which was the case with my last Hogwan).
Just say no!
Granted, if you are planning on staying a while I would think it's a good idea. |
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