Korean Job Discussion Forums

ABC KID · Joined: 14 Sep 2007

I've taught hundreds of students in Korea and back in the UK in my time and occasionally a female student has developed a small crush on me. Thankfully nothing too serious and nothing that has ever remotely threatened to get out of hand or cause me any real grief. However, crushes do have the potential to make serious trouble...

Has anyone personally experienced students having crushes on them? Did the student soon lose interest or did it become a problem? How did you feel about it? How did it pan out in the end?

If you haven't personally experienced it, what would you do if it were to happen to you?

R. S. Refugee · Joined: 29 Sep 2004 Location: Shangra La, ROK

Ignore it. Don't acknowledge it in any way. It will soon go away. For example, if a student holds up a sign in class saying, "I love you, Refugee," I ignore it. If a student says, "I love you, R.S." I pretend not to hear it. Completely ignore it. It will soon go away. This approach works the best, I think. It's always worked quickly with 100% success for me in any event. Simple. Uncomplicated. Successful.

ttompatz · Joined: 05 Sep 2005 Location: Kwangju, South Korea

mrsquirrel · Joined: 13 Dec 2006

Stuff students fallling in love.

I have fallen in love with the 26 year old new teacher that is hidden upstairs in the old peoples office.

When she wears that tight white skirts and climbs the stairs it drives me wild

livinseoul · Joined: 28 Nov 2007

moosehead · Joined: 05 May 2007

laogaiguk · Joined: 06 Dec 2005 Location: somewhere in Korea

I work at a university. This happens at least four times a session. Only one turned into a minor stalker, but got the hint later. I just treat them like everyone else. Don't ignore them or treat them special in any way.

Snowkr · Joined: 03 Jun 2005

A good thread...

I also find the whole idea pretty creepy. I used to think it was cute when I worked in a high school but working with grown adults who display this kind of behavior is a whole other story...

To me it seems more natural and tolerable somehow when young women students develop a crush on their male teacher but not when older men start showing interest in their female teacher.

I also find it best to ignore this behavior as much as possible!

nobbyken · Joined: 07 Jun 2006 Location: Yongin ^^

I used to get the puppy dog eyes from boys in my previous school (elem).

I am a 35 year old man!

Felt some warm breath on my neck one day. One boy was smelling my ear, and pouting as if going to plant a smacker on my cheek.
I told his classmates so they would rib him.
He tried 2 differnt times, while I was engrossed looking at my screen.

Another time, I stretched over the desk to mark homework and this slow girl blew seductively in my ear?

cdninkorea · Joined: 27 Jan 2006 Location: Seoul

The closest I've had was in a girl's high school. One girl on two separate days interrupted "Teachuh..." as though she had a question. "Yes?" I inquired. Then the reply: "I love you".
The first time I flatly said "okay" and continued on as though it never happened. The second time I quiped "no you don't" and again went on with my lesson. It didn't happen again after that.

The reason I say it's the closest I've had to a student crush is because I don't think she meant it; just trying to get attention is my guess.

Oh, and laogaiguk, didn't you once write about high school girls in Japan flashing you under their skirts in class and trying to chat you up on the bus? Or am I confusing you with someone else? If it's you, what exactly happened again?

ESL Milk "Everyday · Joined: 12 Sep 2007

I get this from several girls at my middle school, and I don't really take it very seriously-- I just smile like I'm very flattered. It's really not necessary to act like the crush is threatening to you or embarrassing in any way... there's no reason to be a dick or hurt anyone.

If you say bluntly and publicly that you don't like them or that they don't like you, you're not treating them like human beings... I mean, they do have feelings, and they're probably really sensitive. Maybe they really do like you, and it would only crush them if you pull rank and treat them like they're not mature enough to know what they're doing.

laogaiguk · Joined: 06 Dec 2005 Location: somewhere in Korea

jbpatlanta · Joined: 02 Jun 2007 Location: Daejeon

There are some girls I teach that seem to have a crush on me. They will find a reason to ask me a question in class and then say "Teacher, I love you" I just smile, say thank you, and continue with the lesson.

Zutronius · Joined: 16 Apr 2007 Location: Suncheon

I work in a girls high school and i get it the odd time. Just ignore and they stop trying. They'll get the hint and stop.

bassexpander · Joined: 13 Sep 2007 Location: Someplace you'd rather be.

Had this happen sometimes at the high school I used to work at. One of the girls kept asking me to come back to her homeroom, pick her up for lunch, and sit with her while we ate (she asked in front of the whole class -- her name was Hanna).

I finally took Hanna up on it, and showed up at the classroom to get her later that day. She was so thrilled, and of course everyone was so happy for her. I then invited everyone else in the class to sit with us, which thrilled the entire class, but upset Hanna (although she didn't come out and say it, it was obvious).

In Hanna's mind, I was a "bad date" and she never bothered me again.

Laughing

My wife said, "You did a good job!"