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Real Reality
Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Location: Seoul
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 Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 4:52 pm Post subject: Speed Dating, Matchmaking, and Marriage in Korea |
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Marriage on the Rocks
By Kim Hyung-eun, JoongAng Daily (July 23, 2008)
http://joongangdaily.joins.com/article/view.asp?aid=2892660
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ASAN In response to the dropping fertility rate in Korea, an unlikely bunch of matchmakers is rolling up sleeves to play Cupid. Officials of regional governments are running "speed meetings" for single men and women who want to get married. While speed dating is not new in Korea, mass blind dates set up by local government officials are.
"The Bible says, 'Ask and it will be given to you. Seek and you will find. Knock and the door will be opened to you,'" said Kang Hee-bok, the mayor of the city of Asan, two hours south of Seoul in South Chungcheong.
Twenty nervous-looking unmarried men and 20 equally anxious unmarried women listened attentively in the banquet hall of a local hotel last Saturday afternoon....
Commercial dating companies charge around 150,000 won ($147.60) per person for speed dating.
The event hosted by the Asan government was free....
"An average single Korean goes on seven to eight blind dates a year," said Lee Ung-jin, the president of Sunoo. "Speed dating is tiring, but it's also a rare opportunity to look beyond obvious charms such as looks and eloquence and give everyone a chance."
The problem in Korea is that an increasing number of Koreans are souring on the idea of marriage and raising a family. Many young people say the cost of childcare and education makes bringing up a child a daunting prospect.
The National Statistical Office's data shows that the marriage rate -- the number of marriages divided by 1,000 people -- decreased to 7 percent last year from 9.6 percent in 1991. Meanwhile, people are getting married later: The average age for marriage went up to 29.6 last year from 27 in 1996. More worrying, Korea's fertility rate stood at 1.26 last year. The average fertility rate in countries belonging to the Organisation for Economic Cooperation and Development is 1.6. |
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PRagic
Joined: 24 Feb 2006
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| Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 6:34 pm Post subject: |
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Hey, RR, you MUST have the stats on Korea's contribution to baby exports. There is no adoption in this country, yet they gripe about the fertility rate.
As long as you're at it, please list the stats they use for the fertility rate. Do they actually count the children born out of wedlock? |
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matthews_world
Joined: 15 Feb 2003
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| Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 7:17 pm Post subject: |
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| 1 Korean friend in particular said she often paid a matchmaker 1 million each time to be set up with an eligible man. Most of the time she was disappointed - divorcees w/ kids, dark-skinned guys. She was mid 30s and she said she liked 40+ executive types. |
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Julius
Joined: 27 Jul 2006
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| Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 7:21 pm Post subject: |
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| PRagic wrote: |
| There is no adoption in this country, yet they gripe about the fertility rate. |
I don't get why they think theres a need to increase the population. I can hardly walk down the street without being crodwed off the pavement.
As I keep explaining to my supervisor, western nations have declining birthrates too, but they allow in immigrants to make up the numbers. (She looks shocked).
"If you llowed more immigrants into Korea, after 10-15 years they would be like Koreans, and have married into Korean society". (She looks even more shocked).  |
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Kimbop
Joined: 31 Mar 2008
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| Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 7:46 pm Post subject: |
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| Julius wrote: |
I don't get why they think theres a need to increase the population. I can hardly walk down the street without being crodwed off the pavement.
As I keep explaining to my supervisor, western nations have declining birthrates too, but they allow in immigrants to make up the numbers. (She looks shocked).
"If you llowed more immigrants into Korea, after 10-15 years they would be like Koreans, and have married into Korean society". (She looks even more shocked). |
I disagree with her. Koreans know that foreigners for the most part DON'T assimilate into Korean society. I know several English teachers who have been in Korea for years, but can't order food over the phone.
Koreans know that their culture would quickly be wiped out; much like what's slowly happening in Europe.
Families have traditionally been the social safety net for Korean seniors. Hence the pressure for the kids, especially the eldest son, to be successful. Korean seniors who actually depend on scant Korean pension schemes have trouble making ends meet. |
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Oreovictim
Joined: 23 Aug 2006
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| Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 9:23 pm Post subject: |
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| Speaking of speed dating. Where can you do that in Seoul? I remember one guy saying that they have one for foreign guys and Korean women. Not that expensive, though. |
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Young FRANKenstein
Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Location: Castle Frankenstein (that's FRONKensteen)
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| Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 9:44 pm Post subject: |
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| matthews_world wrote: |
| 1 Korean friend in particular said she often paid a matchmaker 1 million each time to be set up with an eligible man. Most of the time she was disappointed - divorcees w/ kids, dark-skinned guys. She was mid 30s and she said she liked 40+ executive types. |
Oh, the horror of it all! |
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wanamin
Joined: 14 Apr 2008
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| Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 10:18 pm Post subject: |
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| Young FRANKenstein wrote: |
| matthews_world wrote: |
| 1 Korean friend in particular said she often paid a matchmaker 1 million each time to be set up with an eligible man. Most of the time she was disappointed - divorcees w/ kids, dark-skinned guys. She was mid 30s and she said she liked 40+ executive types. |
Oh, the horror of it all! |
Personally, I would NEVER date a dark-skinned guy. |
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bejarano-korea
Joined: 13 Dec 2006
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| Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 10:25 pm Post subject: |
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| wanamin wrote: |
| Young FRANKenstein wrote: |
| matthews_world wrote: |
| 1 Korean friend in particular said she often paid a matchmaker 1 million each time to be set up with an eligible man. Most of the time she was disappointed - divorcees w/ kids, dark-skinned guys. She was mid 30s and she said she liked 40+ executive types. |
Oh, the horror of it all! |
Personally, I would NEVER date a dark-skinned guy. |
and you think we'd would date you fat stuff?  |
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bassexpander
Joined: 13 Sep 2007
Location: Someplace you'd rather be.
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| Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 10:48 pm Post subject: |
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| Oreovictim wrote: |
| Speaking of speed dating. Where can you do that in Seoul? I remember one guy saying that they have one for foreign guys and Korean women. Not that expensive, though. |
Some person or group used to set those up every 4 or 6 months in Itaewon last year. I kept getting emails about it, but got married so I didn't attend for obvious reasons.  |
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Yaya
Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 2:09 am Post subject: |
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| matthews_world wrote: |
| 1 Korean friend in particular said she often paid a matchmaker 1 million each time to be set up with an eligible man. Most of the time she was disappointed - divorcees w/ kids, dark-skinned guys. She was mid 30s and she said she liked 40+ executive types. |
What a stupid gold digger. She paid one million won for each meeting? Geez, I'd stop going to that matchmaker. |
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Young FRANKenstein
Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Location: Castle Frankenstein (that's FRONKensteen)
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| Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 2:22 am Post subject: |
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| Yaya wrote: |
| matthews_world wrote: |
| 1 Korean friend in particular said she often paid a matchmaker 1 million each time to be set up with an eligible man. Most of the time she was disappointed - divorcees w/ kids, dark-skinned guys. She was mid 30s and she said she liked 40+ executive types. |
What a stupid gold digger. She paid one million won for each meeting? Geez, I'd stop going to that matchmaker. |
I was under the impression REAL matchmakers only collect a fee if the two people actually gel. One date don't do it. Legitimate ones will wait for a month of dating or so before collecting, Hell, some won't even collect until an engagement or marriage comes out of the deal. It gives them incentive to make good matches.
Getting paid just for a first date? Where's my incentive to match you to a nice guy? If he's not your type, you'll just pay again for another botched first date, and on and on until you catch wise to my game. |
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mindmetoo
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
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| Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 2:59 am Post subject: |
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| But the Korean dating method is speed dating. |
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