Korean Job Discussion Forums

[waterbaby]

The only negative thing his parents ever brought up when we first got together were our potential kids... worried about how they might be (mis)treated in Korea... but now they want us to hurry up and make "beautiful" babies

Ody's right... it is a lot of fun. For example, going back to Australia with him for a few visits was awesome... seeing my hometown & surrounds through fresh eyes & introducing him to so many people was a lot of fun. He has a natural kind of charm that rubs off on people and it's great to see people warm to him quite quickly. I love our differences (not that I'm not without my own brand of charm ).

Hopefully your boyfriend's parents will warm to the idea when they see that you guys are serious & that he's happy.

We communicate mostly in English and his English is OK, but he's nowhere near fluent. Sometimes this can be problematic. I have to remember that English is his second language and his intent is sometimes not what he communicates . Keeping this in mind is really important.

[Lloyd Christmas]

TB wrote:

[peppergirl]

[quote="waterbaby"]
We communicate mostly in English and his English is OK, but he's nowhere near fluent. Sometimes this can be problematic. I have to remember that English is his second language and his intent is sometimes not what he communicates . Keeping this in mind is really important.[/quote]

Same here

I haven't been posting on this board too long, as I just came to Korea.
I met my husband in Japan, where we lived together for about 2 years. Didn't tell my parents about the living together (they suspected it I guess) because they are pretty conservative, but my husband told his family. They didn't like it too much, but nothing they could do about it They seemed to like me though.

When we got engaged, his family wasn't surprised at all, as we were already living together. Our Korean friends all assumed getting married was not a big step as we were living together already anyway!
I had heard all these stories about Korean mothers not approving of their son's (Korean) girlfriends, so I was pretty relieved everything went to smoothly.

And then I told my family... Have to mention that my dad is caucasian, mum is Chinese... so I thought, they will never object... Well, they didn't really object as I obviously made my decision already, but I was a bit disappointed about their reaction. For some reason ALL Chinese (really!!) thinks Korean guys abuse their wives... all my mother's Chinese friends, family were telling her that! Until my family came to Korea for the wedding, and they got to know my husband and his family a bit better, and we made a trip to Seorak-san together (us, sister, parents and Chinese grandparents!). At the end my Chinese grandmother was telling my sister to get a Korean husband too

We've been married for about 1,5 years now, and it's been great (except that I was still living in Japan until several months ago!).

My family is getting quite international, wonder what nationality my sister will marry

For those with 'mixed' kids, I grew up in an international family, and though I resented it at times (mostly primary school, when kids would make fun of my chinese mum), it was a very happy childhood and now proud to have both Euopean and Chinese heritage! My Chinese isn't very fluent as I grew up in Europe, but it's good enough to talk to my Chinese family, which makes them (esp grandparents) happy!

[waterbaby]

[little mixed girl]

......

[Ilsanman]

Aren't we all a little (or a lot) more popular with Korean men or women than we are with our own countrymates of the opposite sex?

[mokpochica]

Like waterbaby said, I just got married to a Korean guy. We've known each other almost 3 years now and I've been through a lot of different stages and emotions throughout the whole thing. I lived in Korea 2 years and now he is coming to live in the States.

I am very lucky in some regards. My husband's family has been very supportive of our relationship. My family has been too. People's attitude tends to be "If you are happy, so are we." I think that ultimately they trust our judgment. My parents genuinely like him and his mom and family genuinely like me too. I speak enough Korean to communicate basic things with them and that has helped immensely as well.

I know that I felt a lot more comfortable about our relationship once I met people like waterbaby and ody and realized I wasn't alone. I did have a few American friends who were teaching in Korea with me and seemed to think I was crazy to get involved with any Korean man. Other friends were always supportive---and now some of the naysayers have come around.

I think that you are obviously the best judge of your situation and if you feel that this romance is good and right for you, then that is the best vote of confidence you can receive.

[the wrangler]

[kiwiboy_nz_99]

[sistersarah]

thanks peppergirl and mokpochica for your stories as well. it seems it works out more often than i thought....i don't know though, i have a bad feeling, remember the uncomfortable look on his face and his words: "i've told my parents about our relationship, and they said they don't like my idea". conversation over....
i'm hoping when they meet me and realize i'm not some kind of freak, they'll loosen up a little. who knows.

[peppergirl]

They usually do... And if they don't immediately, they definitely will once you've produced a grandchild (preferably grandson)

(that was the case with several friends in Korean-Korean marriages!)

[elmer]

hi girls!

Seems I've been forgotten on the board. My husband is Korean too, almost 3 years now. Met in Korea, now live in Canada.

We sort of fooled his parents thinking that I was just a friend, but sooner or later they found out and it wasn't a biggie. by this time, however, they knew me a bit, so it wasn't a huge shock. They were generally supportive of our getting married, although they had a few stereotypes about "american" women....what will happen when she leaves you (all western people get divorced), how can you ever save any money (western people don't save any cash)...stuff like that.

But they are happy and so is his entire family. Just make sure you help out alot if you visit his home. It's polite and also pretty much expected.

good luck sistersarah, it seems like most of the experiences expressed so far have been positive. no reason to think yours won't be as well!

[crazylemongirl]

This thread has been great. I like hearing nice stories of people in love

[Lloyd Christmas]

[Tiger Beer]