Korean Job Discussion Forums

[jhuntingtonus]

I might be moving to Korea next year. I'm 51 years old but look and act like 45 or less. I have enjoyed the discussion on younger Korean women, but how about those 35-60? How does one find them and date them? (I think Asian women are GORGEOUS.)

(Side question - are there significant numbers of women under 35 who might be interested in a moderately attractive Western man of my age, or would pursuing them tend to just get me used?)

[Joe Boxer]

[i4NI]

It's harder for divorced women with kids to find men again, so if you look in that department you could find some luck.

[jajdude]

I know a guy in his 50s who'd get a bit of attention in bars or out on the street drinking in the good weather. He'd dance in the clubs and was quite friendly, and sometimes girls in their 20s showed interest. This happened mainly in Shincheon (around Yonsei University, Seoul) when the weather was nice enough to sit outside, drink, talk, meet strangers, or go in some clubs -- one in particular comes to mind--and just have a good time. I guess a lot has to do with personality. An older guy may seem less threatening somehow? If you are in Seoul I'd recommend Shincheon. It's one area I miss sometimes. Itaewon can be OK too sometimes.

[VanIslander]

dating ajumma... your thread title should be 'dating ajumma'

i've been here since 2002 and i think this is the first 'dating ajumma' thread at dave's ever

i don't know if 'bravo!' is in order...

[bogey666]

I sometimes see different definitions and interpretations of that term.... as well as adjosshi.

one is simply "middle aged".

but then I often see young MARRIED Koreans, even in their twenties, referred to by those terms.

so what gives? how and when is it applicable?

btw. there are a couple of older women in my gym who are workout freaks (though they spend a lot of time doing light stretching, some walking on treadmill and those Korean belt massage things, etc. ) and in there daily who I'd do in a NY minute. They have better bodies than the fat young(er) girls.


p.s. btw OP how is "acting" 45, or 42 for that matter that much different from "acting" 51? Looking I understand.. but acting... that confuses me...

unless one is expected to become progressively more boring and closedminded and unaware of popular culture among them as they get older.

[Ice Tea]

The way we interpret the term is clearly different from how they see it. For them it's just a general term for adults outside the family group. Like how we would say Ma'am or Sir.

Us foreign teachers have adopted the word to describe the particularly overzealous 30-50 generation of Koreans. The Koreans actually refer to this group as the "386 generation", meaning people born in the sixties and attending uni in the eighties. This generation displays quite easily reconignizable characteristics. Men smoke almost universally. Women are subservient. The men are usually workaholics, soju drinkers, and hands-off fathers. The women adore curly hair, and obsess over the raising of their child. This generation is Korea's first real modern generation, having learned successfully to do complex jobs, but they're still pretty raw culturally. Old Confucian beliefs abound, communist sympathies are high, individualism lacking. When we hear the word Ajoema we instantly think a curly haired mother wearing a sunvisor and stalking a hagwon. Ajoeshi brings up a smoking arrogant man who is always talking just a little too loud.

There's clearly a break between the War generation, the 386 generation, and the under 30 crowd. So the words"halmoni", "ajoema" just seem like a perfect fit when we arrived to describe a generational phenomena, but again, the words predate the social correlation and are not understood in the same way by Koreans.

[yeoja]

[weatherman]

[Ice Tea]

As I just said above there are clear and large differences between generations. So my advice to you is that if you do decide to enter the middle-aged dating market, be aware that the women you will meet will be of the character I just describe. A free-thinking individualist flower child you will not find older than 30. She will be very concerned with her image. Don't expect public displays of affection. And do expect that she'll have expectations of you. Be prepared to play the traditional male role of protector and provider. Fulfilling that role is almost the only thing necessary to properly attract an "ajoema" in Korea.

[bogey666]

[orosee]

Sorry, have to disagree with that. I'm early 40's but look and act 50 and I've been having great times with a handful of ladies in their early to mid 40s. 2 separated (as good as divorced) and one never married, all of them have been abroad, speak fluent English, love the things I love and enjoy going out as much as spending time in bed. Though none of them except the last would stay overnight (kids at home), which is not always a bad thing. Not afraid to touch, hold hands, kiss in public. Attractive, a few wrinkles yes but a few days a week in the jimjilbang and gym have preserved shapes that I can only envy.

Be prepared to spend a bit but at this age, who cares? The ladies are more likely to foot the next bill anyway.

Not a lot of jealousy either but don't tell them if you spent some quality time in Thailand. That seems to scare them.

I'm not listing the nutcases but the ratio seems to be 50:50 based on a sampling size of 6.

I'm not an expert on that area but I wouldn't start looking in Itaewon. The internet can be your friend of course. And say that you're 49. Nobody will ask for your ID.

I can't speak for the over-50 ladies here, but I assume that most of them are busy racing young English teachers for the last seat in the subway, so you better start at the bottom age range. And don't push away the occasional 27 y.o. who prefers style over stamina

[bogey666]

ok I'll bite (again)

I understand the looking part.. but can you PLEASE explain what "acting fifty" is like?

or acting "forty" for that matter?

or even thirty?

[GreenlightmeansGO]

ajumma = married woman

ajoshi = married man

agashi = unmarried woman

chong-gak = unmarried man

[orosee]