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ryleeys

Joined: 22 Dec 2003 Location: Columbia, MD
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Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2004 4:19 pm Post subject: |
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Similar idea...
What if you're dating a girl, then she signs up for your class? (or conversely, if you sign up for the classes she teaches) |
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peppermint

Joined: 13 May 2003 Location: traversing the minefields of caddishness.
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Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2004 4:43 pm Post subject: |
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I would discourage someone I'm seeing from taking my classes and I'd never sign up for a class with a guy I was seeing.
I find it awkward even teaching close friends because it throws off the chemistry of the class. Other students might get concerned that they aren't getting enough attention etc.
I figure as long as you keep it professional while the person is your student, what you do afterwards isn't an issue. |
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itaewonguy

Joined: 25 Mar 2003
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Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2004 7:21 pm Post subject: |
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nothing wrong with it!! if she wants it.. then give her the magic stick!
but of course foget about getting paid after that
and once it doesnt work out.. you know you move on to the next one.
forget about having her back on the pay roll!!!
DO IT!! |
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Apple Scruff
Joined: 29 Oct 2003
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Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2004 10:52 pm Post subject: |
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Re: Is it unethical to date your adult students?
Hot student: Go nuts.
Ugly student: "Sorry, that would be unethical." |
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jaderedux

Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Location: Lurking outside Seoul
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Posted: Sat Jan 17, 2004 5:12 pm Post subject: |
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no ifs, and or buts...it is unethical. It is a question of professional ethics. Once they are no longer your student that is different story.
I find all the hedging and excuse making pretty sad. YOU SHOULD NOT DATE YOUR STUDENTS. It is not fair to them or the other students in the class. I don't know any female or male that can could keep these things entirely seperate. The other students will resent it as it won't be a secret for long and if you break up things could get ugly.
It simply is not ethical. I don't care that it is a hogwan show some damn discipline. You can't wait it out a few weeks/months until they are in a different class. If the urge is so strong then you should recommend the student be placed in another class so there is no conflict.
I can't believe all this excuse making. It is not right plain and simple. It's not right in America, Canada, England, France, Quatar and it is not right in KOREA.
Jade |
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SuperHero

Joined: 10 Dec 2003 Location: Superhero Hideout
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Posted: Sat Jan 17, 2004 6:10 pm Post subject: |
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| jaderedux wrote: |
no ifs, and or buts...it is unethical. It is a question of professional ethics. Once they are no longer your student that is different story.
I find all the hedging and excuse making pretty sad. YOU SHOULD NOT DATE YOUR STUDENTS. It is not fair to them or the other students in the class. I don't know any female or male that can could keep these things entirely seperate. The other students will resent it as it won't be a secret for long and if you break up things could get ugly.
It simply is not ethical. I don't care that it is a hogwan show some damn discipline. You can't wait it out a few weeks/months until they are in a different class. If the urge is so strong then you should recommend the student be placed in another class so there is no conflict.
I can't believe all this excuse making. It is not right plain and simple. It's not right in America, Canada, England, France, Quatar and it is not right in KOREA.
Jade |
Damn Strait! |
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Real Reality
Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Location: Seoul
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Mr. Pink

Joined: 21 Oct 2003 Location: China
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Posted: Sat Jan 17, 2004 10:45 pm Post subject: |
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| Real Reality wrote: |
Is it ever acceptable to date one of my students?
The answer to this question is a simple and unqualified "No"--not for as long as he or she is your student. Ultimately, however, the burden of responsibility is with the instructor.
http://teaching.uchicago.edu/handbook/tac08.html#date
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This is actually a good read. I'd suggest other's take a look at it. |
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lawyertood

Joined: 17 Jan 2003 Location: Seoul, Incheon and the World--working undercover for the MOJ
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Posted: Sun Jan 18, 2004 12:06 am Post subject: |
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| Perhaps on a tangent to the original topic but I work with a guy(married kyopo) who stays in university housing during the week (away from his wife) and holds study group sessions with a small group of students in his apartment at night. They usually have dinner, a discussion ( often about sex related topics) and then drink. Personally I think this is wrong and may end up blowing up in his face. Your thoughts? |
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rapier
Joined: 16 Feb 2003
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Posted: Sun Jan 18, 2004 4:05 am Post subject: |
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| Mr pink: good article! |
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Mr. Pink

Joined: 21 Oct 2003 Location: China
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Posted: Sun Jan 18, 2004 5:06 am Post subject: |
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| rapier wrote: |
| Mr pink: good article! |
It was a Real Reality posting. Probably one of the more useful this month.
Yes some people actually check the links out. |
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TECO

Joined: 20 Jan 2003
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Posted: Sun Jan 18, 2004 10:36 am Post subject: |
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| Is it unethical for me to date my Chinese teacher? |
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kangnamdragon

Joined: 17 Jan 2003 Location: Kangnam, Seoul, Korea
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Posted: Sun Jan 18, 2004 9:44 pm Post subject: |
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| ryleeys wrote: |
Similar idea...
What if you're dating a girl, then she signs up for your class? (or conversely, if you sign up for the classes she teaches) |
Why would she sign up for your class when she is already getting it for free? |
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Butterfly
Joined: 02 Mar 2003 Location: Kuwait
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Posted: Sun Jan 18, 2004 11:27 pm Post subject: |
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As is often the case on discussion on this board, we ultimately come to realize we are arguing the same point. I have said, "sh*t yeah, date your fuggin students, how else are you going to meet charming members of the opposite sex? Just be careful." others have said, "It is unethical, you should wait until the class is finished, or ask them to transfer out." This is the same point essentially. I'm not going to refuse a woman who likes me, just because she is in my class, but I will carefully analyze the situation in case it becomes embarrassing, but in most cases I advise just to chip with the guy/girl, until the class is over (but don't lose the momentum) and then go for it, if you are SURE he/she is into you. Not backtracking, just saying, I'm open to women in my class but will in most cases not make a serious move until the class is over; students or ex-students, to me, I pretty much meant the same thing.
| lawyertood wrote: |
| Perhaps on a tangent to the original topic but I work with a guy(married kyopo) who stays in university housing during the week (away from his wife) and holds study group sessions with a small group of students in his apartment at night. They usually have dinner, a discussion ( often about sex related topics) and then drink. Personally I think this is wrong and may end up blowing up in his face. Your thoughts? |
Even if the guy wasn't married, then I'd say he'd still be on pretty shaky ground. But then it might be totally innocent, depends who he invites to his place I guess. Lots of tight skinned young 21 year old women? Got to say I'd envy him, but he'd be in big danger of his world collapsing, losing his job and his wife. If I was married, I wouldn't want to put temptation in my way, and wouldn't do such a thing. Women that age too, could make your life really difficult.
And assuming, given being married and working as a professor he's approaching or in his thirties, why other than sex, would you want to hang out with a load of 21 year old kids? I reckon the guy ought to get a bit of a talking to.. You going to take that task on Lawyertodd? Don't envy you there mate. |
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ajuma

Joined: 18 Feb 2003 Location: Anywere but Seoul!!
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Posted: Thu Jan 22, 2004 4:20 am Post subject: |
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WHOA!!!!! When GUYS talk about dating female students, THAT'S ok (well, according to most of the posters, that is!) but when the guy wants to date his FEMALE teacher, THAT'S cause for "titters"? (Gee, I thought I was back in elementary school). Seems a little sexist to me!!!!
So, what ABOUT women teachers dating THEIR students???? Is THAT ok?? |
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