Korean Job Discussion Forums

[slideaway77]

I need some advice here. I've had to stop drinking alcohol and caffiene completely for medical reasons. But my social life revolves around drinking.
I want to change my lifestyle but because all my friends drink it's very difficult. The drinking culture amongst expats seems impossible to escape. Additionally I'm single and usually need to get drunk to be more sociable.
Saturday night and I'm stuck in my apartment. The isolation over here is terrible as I work in a public school during the week. I miss being around other foreigners. But if I go out I will want to drink. I'm on serious antibotics so I have to avoid situations where I'll be around alcohol.
Most of the non-drinkers I've met over here tend to be really religious-I couldnt pretend to be religious it's not me. I cant see a way around this?
I have days when I start to think about leaving but if I went home things would be the same. Has anyone had similar problems? The problem isn't drinking just getting by socially without it? I want to get out more without having to drink.

[ashland]

get a girlfriend... or better yet go back home and get a real job

[mervsdamun]

Is it a temporary or permanent situation?

Difficult situation.

Drinking is a strong social glue, both for foreigners and Koreans.

I would quit in your shoes... I could not handle it.

That said, I can think of one situation where I might stay away from drink.

Get a woman you want to be serious with. No need (no permission) to socialise with others. Make her the focal point of your life.

Of course, it's not as simple as that.

If drinking is a serious threat to your health, then leave. The other alternative that is non-Christian is to explore Buddhism is some depth
or get a hobby like photographing unique things about Korea.

Just ask yourself: what is it that I could accomplish/ want to do that does not involve people. Is there something in my life that requires a lot of peace and quiet? Are there any anti-social hobbies you may have (like collecting and analysing sport statistics)?

Think of that and hopefully you will find something that will allow you to survive your contract.

[Johnny_Bravo]

I've drank to any degree one time in over a year in Korea, that was soju with some senior teachers and vp from my school just to shock them and show them I could drink. The look on their eyes was priceless.

do you have to be a complete teetotaler?

if you can drink in limited amounts, that's all you really need. After all, at least for me, a drink in a club or social setting is really most about having something to hold in my hand and looking the part, rather than the effects of the alcohol.

seriously, what the problem? order a coke or an orange juice at a club and socialize anyways. Sure it's a little harder and you're more self conscious when sober, but at least you'll know you're also not acting like a complete idiot. I'm assuming your medical condition is temporary, as you can't stay on serious antibiotics forever.

The time off might help you down the road. The serious drinking, of which I see a lot of among both Koreans and expats is for losers.

[Kurtz]

Maybe you have some shyness issues, or perhaps you are an alcoholic.

What kind of drunken dicks do you have for friends? Not all expats are beer swilling, bottom feeders who still think they are in college. Try get some culture in your life, go to a restaurant, see a movie, read a book, go to the gym, find some groups on Facebook who have similar interests and hang out.

I don't drink much, but I can still hang out, even though in general I avoid fellow expats like the plague (the horror, the horror!) I'm not a church going geek either. Saturday nights usually involves a date with a cardboard cut out (Korean girl) or an early night for an early start on the bike Sunday morning.

The ESL game in Korea is a cruel mistress, can be lonely at times, but someone's gotta do it.

[Xuanzang]

If it`s cirrhosis of the liver then you might as well go home. You can still socialize with cocktails. They usually contain the bare minimum amount of liquor anyway or a coke without the rum.

[D.D.]

It sounds like you need some help. Most of being an alcoholic revolves the fact that people drink to avoid how mundane life can be.

So you are at a crossroads= one path leads to alcoholic problems with a supporting crew of friends heading down the same road. The other path is about learning to face yourself and life sober.

I am not saying it is easy. I too struggle with how mundane life is and enjoy drinking to be social.

Facing life sober is a lot about getting to know yourself and taking long term paths that the rewards are not always obvious at first.

Alcohol is about numbing yourself so there is a buffer between you and reality.

One man I know says life is like being on a bridge and its' tense on the bridge. He says there is one way forward on the bridge and the road can be tough.

The other part of the bridge is the path back to unconsciousness that we all try to take.

Problem is that the drugs or alcohol only make us unconscious for a while and we wake up on the bridge again.


In other words you can't really avoid your life but you can try to but you will always eventually have to face things.

Or you could really numb yourself and mess things up really bad.


You are not at the point where you can dabble with drinking. Stay away from it and people that drink as well.


I find meditation helps a lot by getting me to a place where I feel good inside.

Getting to know your spirit is good and does not require becoming religious.

Korea is a horrible place for social people that don't like to drink ar need to relax on the drinking.

There are pockets of really cool people around the planet that have fun without drugs and alcohol.

India is an amazing place to visit if you need to find a new path and meet people that are not trying to numb themselves.


After they get stronger some people can enjoy a drink once in a while. But I get the feeling you need some time away from alcohol and some friends that think coffee is a serious drug.

good luck pm me if you need advice.

[slideaway77]

If I went home the circles I move in would be all drinkers + no jobs now= pressure to drink.
I have to take antibotics for 3 months at least. I dont want to talk about my health I think I've said enough in that I cant drink for medical reasons.

I just need to find other ways of getting my kicks I guess. I'm otherwise fit and healthy if I dont drink. I want to get a motorbike now and find some face book groups to join. I struggled last year I stopped drinking to do a course whilst working in a hagwon. I just want to avoid being isolated. I must say though weekends without a night out drinking are hard going are me! They are like a pressure valve

[Johnny_Bravo]