Korean Job Discussion Forums

[the boy next door]

new page!

married is better because you always have someone to scratch your back.

[rusty1983]

How do you answer this if youve never been married?

[Omkara]

It really depends on the couple, and their ability to understand their own emotions as they relate to another. It takes a certain level of maturity to make a marriage work, and work well--not to say that staying single is a sign of immaturity.

Marriage is one way of choosing to grow with another. In my case--and I think this is a common case--, the romance wears off, and then it comes time to evaluate what you've got. Chances are, if you still feel strong romantic feelings, it's too soon to get married.

Romance is primarily emotional, and all emotions are perishable, non-stable, and a poor foundation for a marriage. Love is more stable than an emotion, a better rock to found a relationship upon.

For example, you can wake up in the morning, have negative thoughts about your partner. But this is just emotional, and will pass. It is a good chance to learn and practice that the root of the negative emotions is not your partner, but the condition of your body that morning. You learn to better distinguish between self and other, and to realize that most of the crap we pin on others doesn't belong there.

But your partner must also be willing to look inward, for romantic days come and go, crap days come and go. But if you are rooted in one or the other, the relationship will go as quickly as it came. Therefore, rooting deeper is the key to a good marriage. The emotions come and go, but the commitment to the marriage is what keeps it afloat.

Is it better? I think so. Otherwise I wouldn't be doing it. But, like anything, it has two sides, both of which must be accepted, otherwise contentment is impossible. One must learn to be contented with the full array of experiences which it entails.

If one is single, and can't find a partner, it is best to learn to be okay with that, or they will be unhappy. But if one has a partner, they must learn to be okay with the less pleasant side of things in order to gain the deeper companionship of another which whom he or she may learn and grow.

In either case, if we are learning and growing, we cannot be in a better place. Wishing to be in another place is only suffering, adding baggage to a situation which does not properly belong to the situation.

Letting go of that baggage allows the room one needs to become happy and content.

[shapeshifter]

[JasperTeach]

[the boy next door]

[tophatcat]

married

[Nester Noodlemon]

I need 25 posts, so I voted. Married!

[the boy next door]

married is better because you always have someone to dance with...

[rusty1983]

[travel zen]

Hehe.

I have always treated married women who wanted me as mentally challenged rebellious slaves. Slaves! because they are too scared, weak and unintelligent to leave whatever relationship they are in. So they run around like headless chickens messing people and themselves up.
Just say no.

Being married can be the best thing happening, but only if he/she is a good person, ready to make things work.

[MissSeoul]

[catman]

[roadwork]

I think a lot of it comes down to age and experience. For me, I never thought I would get married and gave up on relationships after the last girlfriend I had. Then, one day, I asked another girl on a date, and it was as natural as anything could be. We're still together and planning to get married soon. It's also fun because of the language ability is about intermediate level on my part. The arguments are short lived.

Now, on the other hand: After the initial excitement of everything being new and fresh and things mellow out and become comfortably secure, (this is for the married lads) do you experience new levels of excitement or is it like slipping on your favorite pair of sneakers...old but comfy as hell?

[the boy next door]

being married is better because you always have someone to get drunk with...