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misher
Joined: 14 Oct 2008
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Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2009 11:52 pm Post subject: Dirty looks |
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Alright I've only been here for a week and I thought it was mostly me but now I'm not so convinced. Why do I get dirty looks from men? I get a few dirty looks from women but MOST don't even know I'm there as I am some regular. The guys give me dirty looks and it is the worst at the gym. I'm not with a korean girl so what gives? I know dirty looks of contempt when I see it. In China I got looks too but they had a way different vibe to them. They were like "hey I want to come talk to you but I'm shy." Here it is a "Get the feck out of my country" type of look.
How do you vets handle this? Just shrug it off and eventually you don't notice it anymore? I guess that's what I have to start doing and suck it up.
misher |
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Rusty Shackleford
Joined: 08 May 2008
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:15 am Post subject: |
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There are a million different stares a Korean can give you. The majority are probably not dirty stares, most are just slack jawed curiousity. Like if you saw a weird animal or a guy in a funny hat or something. |
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kentucker4

Joined: 03 Sep 2007 Location: Georgia
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:18 am Post subject: Re: Dirty looks |
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misher wrote: |
Alright I've only been here for a week and I thought it was mostly me but now I'm not so convinced. Why do I get dirty looks from men? I get a few dirty looks from women but MOST don't even know I'm there as I am some regular. The guys give me dirty looks and it is the worst at the gym. I'm not with a korean girl so what gives? I know dirty looks of contempt when I see it. In China I got looks too but they had a way different vibe to them. They were like "hey I want to come talk to you but I'm shy." Here it is a "Get the feck out of my country" type of look.
How do you vets handle this? Just shrug it off and eventually you don't notice it anymore? I guess that's what I have to start doing and suck it up.
misher |
People here are actually very nice. Like the other guy said, it's usually sheer curiosity. Just say hey and bow your head slightly to them. |
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Carla
Joined: 21 Nov 2008
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:22 am Post subject: |
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I have never got any dirty looks, usually just smiles. Especially from the older ladies. But when I see them looking, I smile and nod politely and they smile back and nod. But it could be with the fact that I'm a girl. |
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OnTheOtherSide

Joined: 29 Feb 2008
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:25 am Post subject: |
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Don't take the stares seriously. Lots of people take it WAY too seriously. They really are usually just shocked and surpised to see a white person up close. Lots of Koreans outside of Seoul have never even talked to a white person in their lives.
It would be like if you saw an Amazon native with a lip plate and tattooed face. You would stare like a fool wouldn't you? Same thing. |
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Julius

Joined: 27 Jul 2006
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:39 am Post subject: |
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Its not all about you- Koreans are mean to eachother. They treat eachother with a certain level of disdain- unless they've been introduced that is.
Add on staring (because you're foreign) to that default setting, and you end up with something that appears far worse than it is.
if I'm in a bad mood then I generally stare and intimidate them back. most of the time I just ignore it however. Unless someone is really going over the top with it.
It only takes a smile or wave to crease that stare of theirs into a smile, btw. |
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halfmanhalfbiscuit
Joined: 13 Oct 2007 Location: Seoul
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 1:07 am Post subject: |
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I get stares from ajummas I find. I stare back, point to my eyes then point at them. Gives them something to talk about over go-stop I guess. |
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kentucker4

Joined: 03 Sep 2007 Location: Georgia
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 1:14 am Post subject: |
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Adjummas and some adjoshis are the only ones who give me what I would labe a true dirty look on a some what frequent basis. But even most of them aren't that bad. |
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He with Horns on Head
Joined: 19 Aug 2009 Location: Cybergoat farm
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 1:39 am Post subject: |
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I agree with the OP: the stares in China are different to the stares in Korea. Then again, Chinese actually tend to like/be very interested in foreigners in general, whereas Koreans seem to feel insecure around foreigners. |
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beercanman
Joined: 16 May 2009
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 1:51 am Post subject: |
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I concur with the horns on head dude. |
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Pwillig
Joined: 26 Jan 2009
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 1:59 am Post subject: |
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I'm too busy being awesome to notice. |
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BigBuds

Joined: 15 Sep 2005 Location: Changwon
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 2:08 am Post subject: |
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There is no subtly or tact in this country. It�s just thrown out there in your face and they have no idea that it�s actually considered rude by most of the world. As far as most Koreans are concerned, the rest of the world is just a foot note and Korea is the be all end all of everything. |
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roadwork
Joined: 24 Nov 2008 Location: Goin' up the country
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 2:59 am Post subject: |
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BigBuds wrote: |
There is no subtly or tact in this country. It�s just thrown out there in your face and they have no idea that it�s actually considered rude by most of the world. As far as most Koreans are concerned, the rest of the world is just a foot note and Korea is the be all end all of everything. |
Exactly my thoughts. Same as when people cut in front of you, stare into your grocery basket, congratulate you on speaking Korean so well when all you said in Korean was "how much is this?", they just don't know any better. Again, Jogno Guru's classic phrase "Farmers with suits" always comes to mind when dealing with these situations.
Oh and be prepared for the counter-argument that ends all debates with Koreans about the fact that theire culture may be wrong. It starts with a loud assertive "But Korean people think...." Usually that is a signal that you have reached the end of the road and logic is permitted no further (considering you were even able to possibly get logic off the side of the road to begin the argument anyway) |
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I'm no Picasso
Joined: 28 Oct 2008
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:11 am Post subject: |
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Julius wrote: |
It only takes a smile or wave to crease that stare of theirs into a smile, btw. |
This. Just try it once and you'll see. Little bow of the head and you'll get an instant huge grin, almost every time. |
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roll_eks
Joined: 31 Aug 2009 Location: Seoul from Nevada
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:30 am Post subject: |
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getting stared at is really annoying. its in fact the main reason being in korea is difcult. it is just rude behavior. there are so many weegooks around, so why do people in this large city have to stare as if i just came from mars?? |
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