Korean Job Discussion Forums

tanklor1 · Joined: 13 Jun 2006

Well...this is a sad state that I find myself in. I find it rather sad that I'm looking for advice about this issue and it's even sadder that I'm looking for help on an ex-pat message board.

Anywho, here's my problem.

I met a girl that I like over a couple of group dinners. On the second group dinner we exchanged numbers. The next morning I woke up and she was all I could think about.

I called her a couple of days later to set something up and she agreed but she canceled citing being sick. She said she'd give me a call next week.

That was a couple of days ago and I still can't get her off of my mind.

So, I want to either do one of two things: One, get in a position to tell her how I feel or Two: ignore it and leave everything the same because other than this life's been good this year and I don't want to mess it up.

Either way I want this feeling gone.

Advice please...

recessiontime · Posted: Sat Oct 30, 2010 11:45 pm Post subject:

she's clearly not into you and that's why she flaked out on the date. If you were someone famous and telling her about this party happening with p diddy and the gang of celebs she'd go regardless of how 'sick' she was.

She's not going to call you next week either and if she does I'd be surprised.

Find another girl, move on.

tanklor1 · Joined: 13 Jun 2006

Globutron · Joined: 13 Feb 2010 Location: England/Anyang

I think she was so overwhelmed by your existence, she was too intimidated and shy about her inferior looks, you just need to encourage her. Sneak into her apartment and get into her bed. That way when she wakes up she'll think you already broke the ice on a drunken night out, and you can just go from there.

Point being, you're gonna get about 3 options from people on here rather than 2, I guess, and they'll be nothing you haven't thought of...

recessiontime · Posted: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:00 am Post subject:

the problem I suspect is that the OP didn't make a strong enough impression on this girl over the phone. Perhaps he was attractive on that day and she thought so too. But then the girl slept, woke up and was in a neutral emotional state again when the OP called her again. But then she wasn't in the same emotional state she was back on the day when they were talking and exchanging numbers. Suddenly she wasn't so hot about going out. A lot of guys just don't realize that getting numbers is just a stairway to heaven. When you are with the girl, that's the time to make things happen. That's when you have to have advance and touch her, kiss her and convince her to sleep with you.

I'm sure bald teacher agrees with me at least.

calicoe · Joined: 23 Dec 2008 Location: South Korea

tanklor1 · Joined: 13 Jun 2006

recessiontime · Posted: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:08 am Post subject:

^

neediness is ALWAYS a turn off. It shows that you are terrible with women, that you are desperate. It communicates to the woman that you normally can't get women, that your options are terrible, that you don't have a lot going for you.

tanklor1 · Joined: 13 Jun 2006

recessiontime · Posted: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:23 am Post subject:

I think then you can also agree that she is nothing exceptional. There are tons of enticing women out there. Younger ones too. Twisted Evil

tanklor1 · Joined: 13 Jun 2006

recessiontime · Posted: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:48 am Post subject:

then go out and meet other women? I doubt you'll be saying that when your pee pee is stuck inside the cha cha of another woman.

samd · Joined: 03 Jan 2007

She said she'd call you next week, it's not next week yet, so she may still call.

She may really have been sick, or had a small pimple on her face that made her terrified to go on a date, or any number of other valid reasons. If you really like her, don't give up yet, but as previous posters said, don't be desperate.

I would test the waters by texting to ask if she's better, and see if she replies. If she does, you're still in the game. If not, move on.

calicoe · Joined: 23 Dec 2008 Location: South Korea

Yes, good advice, Samd. Sometimes women will postpone a date if we think we are not at our best, especially if we are interested.

And, if she is American, than yes, Western dating rules apply, and you definitely don't want to come on too strong in the beginning, because that makes us feel icky and clammy and like we might want to bolt ... anyway, it does me.

On the other hand, if you start suddenly representing the player role by dating tons of women and playing this out-of-reach game, that could be a turn-off too, especially if it doesn't represent who you are, or what she might have seen in you in the first place (if she saw something that she likes). It's too early for a full charge ahead or pimp games, so just sit tight.

Start going to the gym or something.

cert43 · Joined: 17 Jun 2010

Are you sure she's not German Wink