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Adult Student Crushes?
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radcon



Joined: 23 May 2011

PostPosted: Sat Jun 23, 2012 3:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

luckylady wrote:
ReeseDog wrote:
b.rabbit wrote:
As a woman, I have been the subject of unwanted male attention since I was about 11 or 12. It doesn't matter if it's just some guys undressing you with their eyes or blatant attempts to get into your pants. The attention is always there, no matter what ethnicity, what you're wearing or what you look like.

b.rabbit wrote:
I also didn't want to just assume that all men are horn dogs and want to get into any woman's pants. To say that adult men are not able to form crushes and just want sex seems to be an over-generalization of men?


You contradict yourself, sweetheart.

Elvis, the OP is a troll.






Until I was able to perceive the differences in culture and customs, it was extremely difficult to identify sexual harrassment, which I was experiencing.


Is it harrassment if you didnt even fell harrassed?
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luckylady



Joined: 30 Jan 2012
Location: u.s. of occupied territories

PostPosted: Sat Jun 23, 2012 4:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

radcon wrote:
luckylady wrote:
ReeseDog wrote:
b.rabbit wrote:
As a woman, I have been the subject of unwanted male attention since I was about 11 or 12. It doesn't matter if it's just some guys undressing you with their eyes or blatant attempts to get into your pants. The attention is always there, no matter what ethnicity, what you're wearing or what you look like.

b.rabbit wrote:
I also didn't want to just assume that all men are horn dogs and want to get into any woman's pants. To say that adult men are not able to form crushes and just want sex seems to be an over-generalization of men?


You contradict yourself, sweetheart.

Elvis, the OP is a troll.






Until I was able to perceive the differences in culture and customs, it was extremely difficult to identify sexual harrassment, which I was experiencing.


Is it harrassment if you didnt even fell harrassed?



what I experienced was a deep sense of being uncomfortable (to the point which during one particular episode I only wanted to go home and shower) and that something wasn't quite right. even now, I think if I explained it some people would be are you kidding? and you didn't think something was wrong? but I was trying not to offend someone's culture with which I was unfamiliar.

your question, if honest, is naive - many people suffer all kinds of indignities in the world and are sometimes unaware of what's being perpetrated at their expense, whether sexual or bigotry, whatever.

moreover, the term sexual harrassment is a modern one; is that to say that it only came about in recent times? of course not. as society progresses, we learn how to treat each other with the respect and dignity that everyone deserves. some cultures, and people, just learn this at different times is all.
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Keeper



Joined: 11 Jun 2012

PostPosted: Sat Jun 23, 2012 8:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

If it is that much of a problem then wear a wedding band and carry around a fake picture up of your spouse.
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luckylady



Joined: 30 Jan 2012
Location: u.s. of occupied territories

PostPosted: Sat Jun 23, 2012 11:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Keeper wrote:
If it is that much of a problem then wear a wedding band and carry around a fake picture up of your spouse.


yes, it's always better to keep the status quo rather than educate the populace and guide society towards a more progressive attitude, huh? Confused
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jvalmer



Joined: 06 Jun 2003

PostPosted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 1:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

My advice, if you're a guy, it doesn't really matter. If you're a girl, then assume all men are horndogs and want to get into your pants. You may think your guy friends only think of you as a friend. Believe what makes you feel better, but if he is straight, given an opportunity he will be on top of you.
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Cartman



Joined: 30 Jun 2009

PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 10:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great thread - my favorite comment coming from a female adult student I tutored, was after our last lesson (before I had to leave); she gave me her email and said "keep touching me" Shocked And I did correct her, to save her future embarrassment; Though it makes me wonder if she already knew what she was saying and just did it for the added attention/laughs...
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holydiver



Joined: 08 Feb 2010

PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 3:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

the guy wants to get laid and the combination of a language barrier and him probably being a bit of creeper is making him come across more awkward than necessary. or you're just being an uptight -----.

either way, while conversing with you he's actually undressing you with his eyes and pondering whether or not you have large, dark areolae or small, tiny pink ones.

this is life. take the paycheck or quit.
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radcon



Joined: 23 May 2011

PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 5:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

luckylady wrote:
Keeper wrote:
If it is that much of a problem then wear a wedding band and carry around a fake picture up of your spouse.


yes, it's always better to keep the status quo rather than educate the populace and guide society towards a more progressive attitude, huh? Confused


Korea seems to be making progress on its own on the sexual harrassment front and doesn't need the likes of you to "educate and guide them into a more progressive attitude." Maybe Koreans doesn't want a society where a man can get fired for saying "you look nice today Ms. Johnson."
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sojusucks



Joined: 31 May 2008

PostPosted: Tue Jun 26, 2012 4:28 pm    Post subject: Re: Adult Student Crushes? Reply with quote

b.rabbit wrote:
Has anyone had any experience with their adult students forming a crush on them? I mostly teach older Korean business men (28 - 40yr) and a few of them seem to have formed a crush on me.

The thing is, they are usually married and while they don't actively do anything about the crush, sometimes they will say stuff like "I wish I wasn't married, etc." Or comment on how they don't like married life much, etc.


They are trying to gauge your interest. Second wifes and girlfriends do happen. Make it clear that you are not interested.
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K1020



Joined: 20 Jun 2010

PostPosted: Wed Jun 27, 2012 5:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LOL, after 3 pages this thread reminded me of this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Xo0vietiag
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ATM SPIDERTAO



Joined: 05 Jul 2009
Location: seoul, south korea

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2012 10:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just so you know so you're not sounding like a ridiculous jerk like you are now,

asian countries (i can speak for Korean and China since I'm chinese)

assume it's proper for a teacher to date/marry their students.

ie: a lot of my friends of friends who are highschool teachers married their students (korean guys)

ie: my mom told me to go teach highschool instead of elementary cuz at least i could marry a student

ie: TONS of white dudes who do it with TONS of their students.



GET USED TO THE CULTURE. you spend 1 on 1 time with ANYONE regardless of power distance, you can develop feelings. I'm gonna assume you're somewhat decent looking right? can you blame some older guy who is probably stuck in a boring marriage who longs for some inter-cultural love affairs?

FURTHERMORE, businessmen and ALL Korean men (like literally all) have been to korean versions of strip clubs. they don't think it's wrong to objectify women (or men) so don't take it too personally. They're just testing the water.

you need to get that stick out of your snobby rear and teach only women or something.


korean business men are used to be able to picking up chicks.

you are a chick.

you will get hit on by single AND married men.

they probably think they're the only ones hitting on you too so why dont' you make some kind of remark like "oh yesterday, the best looking young guy in my class asked me out and i turned him down because i like BLACK GUYS"

BOOM. now that will shut down all their stupid advances =)


ps: i work in a big company and a lot of the all male teams go to girly karaoke bars every month and contribute to the sex trade Wink

(sadly, i work in an all Christian divison basically and none of that happens to me lol)
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