Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Ya-ta Boy]

I've been thinking about culture shock lately and I wonder what other people think.

1) Does it (or the potential for an episode) ever go away?
I don't think so. I think all ex-pats live with a constant heightened level of anxiety. I suspect that the most susceptible are those who cannot speak or read, but that it affects all of us all the time.

Those of us who can't communicate easily are like adult illiterates at home. Signs and announcements mean nothing. For example, at multi-level movie theaters, they can't read the sign that tells them which floor to go to. I was on the Green Line going from Jamshil to Hongdae late one night. Suddenly the subway stopped and there was an announcement. My listening skill is low. I didn't understand what was said. Everyone got off. I didn't know why. I didn't know what I was supposed to do.

2)
a. I wonder if the anxiety accounts for the frequency of aggressive behavior from ex-pats. I once saw an ex-pat pick up things from a checkout counter and start flinging them down the aisle. Some ahjumma had cut in front of him and he responded in a way I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have 'back home'.

b. People here, myself included, seem to dwell on life's little inconveniences rather than shrug them off. What comes to mind is the harping about people staring or little kids saying 'hi'. The reactions seem blown out of all proportion to the stimulus.

c. Everyone gets cranky when they are tired. My outbursts happen most often late in the week or when I haven't had much exercise or relaxation.

d. I used to avoid drinking when I felt like I 'needed' a drink. I knew it was an anxiety response. Now I'm much more likely to give in and go drink.

3) "All Koreans ...this", "All Koreans...that". It's always a negative, usually cynical description that follows.

4) I get tired of always having to be the one to adapt. I know I'm outnumbered 45 million to one and it's 'their' country. I get tired of hearing "This is the Korean way". Lately I've wondered if what really bothers me about these situations is a fear of the loss of identity.

I think my worst experience of this was when I was having trouble with my scooter. I took it in to be repaired and thought I'd managed to get the message across. Rode home and realized the problem hadn't been fixed. Got a friend to write out the technical explaination for me and went back. Picked it up the next day and it still wasn't fixed. Got that friend to go to the shop with me. It turns out the guy wouldn't fix it until it completely broke. "It's the Korean way." I lost it and said a few choice words which ticked off my Korean friend. I ended up with 2 offended Koreans and a lousy scooter.

Anyway, it's something that's been on my mind lately and just wondered if there was anyone else around who had some thoughts about it.

[bignate]

Soju and Beer are great buffers.

[Grotto]

I know what you mean Yata boy

It really irks me when a Korean tells me 'you must be more Korean'
Just because they have been doing something the wrong way for 5000 years doesnt make it right!

Having my motorcycle pushed over because someone wants to park where it is Stupid &%&(! Koreans!

There are times where I find myself reaching for the soju bottle just to blur the time of being here. If you are drunk and pass out, wake up and go to work, get drunk and pass out , wake up and go to work. You can blur 2 or 3 months really easily. I dont recommend this method at all. It was a hard habit to break.

Not being able to read the language (except for restruarants) is definately a drawback.

Only having partial understanding of the spoken language is frustrating to say the least.

There will always be culture shock here in Korea. The only thing that can change is the way you deal with it on a personal level. What works for one may not work for another and some people just arent cut out to deal with it at all.

One good side effect of living here is I have become much more aware of how I handle my own responses.

Year one: yelling, swearing, getting angry often, drinking out of control, saying I cant wait to get out of here.

Year two: still drinking too much, nodding my head sagely to things that used to set me off, more shaking my head and laughing to myself at the stupidity and ignorance.

Year three: Hardly drinking at all, laughing at things that used to set me off, shrugging my shoulders at the things I cant change or are beyond my control.

Still drives me nuts when I come out and my motorcycle has been pushed over or moved so some asshole can park where I was. Now instead of cursing all Koreans for the stupidity of one I direct my anger at the moron who moved my bike.

[mindmetoo]

Any ill I see around me is solved by saying "well, I can leave any time I want."

[just because]

I'm also one of those guys who the longer i am her the less i drink and i feel pretty good most days.

i think everyone needs a couple of drinks just to shrug off some worries and it is a good way to get over the small things.
However, there is a limit between drinking for relaxation and and drinking for getting drunk, as 10 beers later I find that I am off the wagon and feel worse than i did a couple of days ago.

But hey...life is life

[Grotto]

one other thing I thought of.

Korea is so technologically advanced that often I forget that their culture is still 1950 ish by Western standards.

When you see this contradiction on a daily basis it adds to the culture shock. Everything seems out of place or time. I find myself thinking: They can program a celphone, they are more computer savvy than most people why havent they also progressed to the same modern norms in Western culture.

Then I remember i'm not in the west...i'm in the east.

[peemil]

Thoughts on culture shock...Hmm... It's better than electro-shock.

[Ya-ta Boy]

[kangnamdragon]

[whatthefunk]

Yeah, I agree with Kangnamdragon...it definately goes away. After about a month, I feel pretty good in a new place. But going back to the states is weird. I get worse culture shock going back there than I ever did going anwhere...dont know why. Maybe cause Im used to encountering strange foreigners and so Im freaked out by all the whities.

[Rock]

I've been thinking about culture shock myself lately. What is it all about, really? Anyone have any knowledge about this?

To me, tt's a REALITY. There's no doubt culture shock is what drives most of us to keep on posting and getting some explanation to it all here, to feel some belonging.

Culture shock can also lead to severe depression. Alcohol will only make this worse. Believe me, I've done this worse than any man.

My comments on culture shock though, are:

Don't drink. Meet Koreans. DO NOT ISOLATE YOURSELF! Go to a church.

I'd like to find out what culture shock really is all about, however, as I don't know it's full implications. It can really affect your mind. Some people here, and in other countries, actually can go crazy. It can also scare you mentally, or emotionally; make you feel you've lost your identity, or give you psychollogical problems; it can lead to feelings of rage, hate, and self-destruction.

I say this because I'd just come from Taiwan and had had severe culture shock. There, you're expected to pretty much do everything on your own. Most of the time you will not be given a helping hand to help you adapt, albeit there are some good people to assist you now and then.

In other words, it's not as accommodating as Korea is.

Korea at least accommodates you. Take culture shock as a state of mind, nothing more, and seek out some counsel or guidance if it's really reoccurring. Better is to learn some of the language like you'd said, keep on studying, and meet some Koreans.

Remember PTSS too. It's also something regular people can contract, not just war vets(Post Traumatic Stress Syndrom.) Really, I'd read an article about this affecting all people in all walks of life, particularly those who've been through a traumatic experience.

[Paji eh Wong]

[Grotto]

[Ya-ta Boy]

Well, I MIGHT be gone for good.

I'm having second thoughts about that.

Right now I'm dealing with a bit of reverse-culture shock in settling in back here. On top of that, the more I deal with high schools and general bureaucracy here, the less attractive teaching in a high school sounds. I'm remembering why I left in the first place.

[uber1024]