Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Reflections]

lets hear them. Anyway, I'll start:

I was enjoying post study 'release' with some Korean students on a Saturday in the Hongdae area in my second year of teaching. We had started a late lunch about two o'clock and it had developed into the presumable soju slugging shot competition.

I was the only westerner in a group of 8 and was losing rather badly. By five o'clock everyone was fairly drunk but I was probably in the worst condition of the males. Functional but very dizzy. So it finished around five o'clock and I made the unfortunate decision of going to Itaewon alone to meet a friend at Gecko's at 8:00.

So I had some time to kill. I decided to go shopping in the Hamilton Hotel Arcade building - that multi-storied place. Not in full control of my limbs, I accidentally knocked a shop mannequin from its pedastal in a ladies clothing shop. It hit the floor with a thud and the left arm was 'dislodged sideways'.

Predictably, the shop owner lost it and called security who then called the Itaewon police. 5 minutes later, two Korean police arrive at the shop and had a conversation with the now irate owner.

The senior policeman of the two told me in his broken English that "this would require further investigation". I tried to tell him in my broken Korean that it would be "difficult to get a statement from the injuried party, namely the mannequin". It didn't work and I was led into the station across the road.

So, the tourist lady from downstairs was called to act as an interpreter. She was sitting next to me, the mannequin was sitting on the otherside and the owner was standing with the police at the counter yelling at me. So it really was a 'room full of dummies', in the truest sense.

What transpired was the owner wanted to me to pay to for the replacement of the other two mannequins that were still standing in the shop as well as the broken one. This was because they were of the same skin colour. Her argument was that it would be impossible to get a replacement the exact same skin colour of the other two. She obviously new that she could take advantage of the situation.

The soju hard worn off and the reality of the situation had kicked in. I was feeling like death. So after much threats that I would be charged and imprisoned for the night the owner cut a deal. I ended up paying 400,000W for a 'new set' of all three. Call me stupid, yes. But being in a police station in a foreign country and being at fault is not fun, so I wanted to cut and run.

But, I can still imagine that senior cop, trying in vain to get a statement from the mannequins wearing the spring collection - but they refused to comment....

[mercury]

I drank soju at a party, then went to the casino, won about 400,000 playing black jack! And then................went to homeplus, bought a basketload of groceries, the total was like 389,000 won. I just paid the lady, well turns out the next day as I was wondering what cost so much, I had mistakenly bought this string of fish, yes, there were these like dried fish on this orange string, and they cost over 200,000 WON! No joke! And I had cooked one of them so i coundnt get my money back! I later found out that only rich people buy those fish, and they only grow like a centimeter a year or something crazy like that. The good note is that the people at Homeplus thought I was "high class" I guess only the richest of the rich buy that, everytime I go back they do a deep bow in the meat department!

[itaewonguy]

man you guys remember your soju nights?
damn I have had so many I wouldnt no where to start,.,

[quiksilver]

[Deconstructor]

On night I�m sitting in this bar drinking Hite and eating popcorn. Suddenly four guys approach my table, introduce themselves, shake my hand and sit down. Within a minute we�re all chummy together and soju is ordered in barrels. Well, needless to say, when Korean tradition is combined with alcohol the result is a week of hangover, but in this case hell also played a prominent role.

After about three hours of heavy passing-the-shooter-glasses, one of the guys slurred out that we should go to another bar. There were no dissenting voices. We got up, paid and left. One of the guys felt that I had to hold his arm while we walked. It seems that in a small town Korea this is an acceptable behaviour and no one would assume anything about one�s sexuality. �Wadya gonna hold?� I replied, �my balls?� He was insulted and that was the point. I was too drunk and didn�t have the capacity of decision to just go home, which I should�ve done. So we continued down the street.

We came across this guy who was sitting quietly on a bench. As I passed by, he said �good evening� and I replied. One of the guys somehow took offence to this greeting; approached this poor fellow and told him how he dared to talk like that to his good Canadian friend and proceeded to push him then slap him. This guy felt profoundly humiliated, and rightly so, got up and attacked this moron. Before I knew it, all hell had broken loose and there were at least a dozen men involved in this scuffle as I desperately tried to separate the warring parties and apologize to the victim.

When everything calmed down, the instigator finally saw the error of his ways, went to the victim, bowed, apologized and asked to be hit. (Di*khead!) The victim did not disappoint and slapped him so hard that everyone could feel the shock wave as all our hair blew back. The di*khead bowed again, said thank you and left.

If a Westerner had ever looked ridiculous and reinforced all the negative stereotypes about Westerners in a foreign country, it must be me! I might as well have been wearing high heels and a skirt because the fight (for some unknown and perplexing reason) was over me and instigated by someone who really wanted me to hold his God damn arm.

Even today, when I look back, it seems more surreal than Dali could ever have imagined.

[Cthulhu]

I have a nice two inch scar on my forearm that's a fond soju memory. On the plus side soju makes a great anaesthetic.

[poddubny]

keep 'em comin!

[Cedar]

There are too many to count and none of the spectacular ones involve any drinking on my own part, and most of them involve situations where the cops should have or were called and it's all terribly depressing and I am so glad I no longer drink or really even go out to be polite with people who are drinking... (like the run-on sentence?)

[Ya-ta Boy]

I have a very long story that didn't happen to me, but in the spirit of sharing, I'll contribute.

A Soju Story

Last night I went out for dak-doe-ri-tang with Yong-Soon and Hae-Hyun. While we were eating, Hae-Hyun told us a story about his senior, Mr. Kim.

A few weeks ago they met downtown for dinner. You need to understand that when Mr. Kim drinks soju, he cannot recognize anyone�s face except for his friend Hae-Hyun. This is an odd quirk of Mr. Kim. For some reason, soju drastically inhibits the part of Mr. Kim�s brain that recognizes faces.

After dinner and a couple of bottles of soju Mr. Kim said he wanted to go to a dal-un-joo-jahm. Well, within minutes Hae-Hyun said they both had to leave because the girls were ugly. Mr. Kim agreed, saying he knew where the best dal-un-joo-jam in town is, where they have the most beautiful girls. So out they go, arm in arm, Hae-Hyun keeping Mr. Kim walking in a more or less straight line. Down to the corner, turning left and on to the next corner and turning left again. After a couple of more corners they were back at the SAME dal-un-joo-jam! Poor Mr. Kim has no clue.

Hae-Hyun refused to go back in and pay money to talk to fat old ugly hostesses. He convinced Mr. Kim to go to a soju tent. So down the street they went.

Upon entering a soju tent they found one of Mr. Kim�s friends, Mr. Na, who was sitting with two women. One woman was very pretty and Mr. Na was hitting on her. Her friend was ugly and bored and Mr. Na needed someone to entertain her while he hustled the pretty one. Mr. Kim was more than happy to oblige because he thought she was pretty. (Of course he would, given his liability.) He sat down next to her and started telling her how beautiful she was. They really hit it off as you can imagine.

After a while Mr. Kim and the ugly woman decided to go outside and sit on the bridge under the moonlight and cherry trees. While talking they decided to sit on the railing. This was not a good choice seeing as Mr. Kim was full of soju. Very quickly Mr. Kim tumbled off backwards, taking the ugly woman with him. They landed on the cement creek bed and were both knocked unconscious.

When Mr. Kim woke up, the next morning he was in the hospital. He was unhurt and sober, and felt terrible when the nurse told him his �girlfriend� had a broken arm. As soon as he was released he rushed out to buy a large stuffed dog and an armload of flowers for her.

He hurried back to the hospital and rushed to her ward. He opened the door and saw only old, fat ugly ajummas. Suddenly he heard �Kim ssi! Kim ssi! Here I am!� He took one look at the ugly fat woman, dropped the stuffed dog and the flowers on the floor and ran out of the hospital.

The moral of the story is: Never fall in love while you are drinking soju.