Korean Job Discussion Forums

[plato's republic]

When you are out on a date with a local lady, what do you talk about? How do you guys keep the conversation flowing? What are the things you do to maintain a fun, relaxed atmosphere and increase your chances of success?

How does your strategy change depending on whether your date speaks good English or not?

My experiences so far have proved somewhat challenging. All the girls I've met have been very shy and quiet which makes it more difficult for me to engage them in scintillating conversation. So what would you do if you were in my shoes?

[Daechidong Waygookin]

Doesnt it differ from girl to girl? If you are trying to increase your chances of "success" you are approaching it wrong. Why not just go, let the evening flow, be yourself and have fun? Whetever is meant to happen, will.

[mindmetoo]

Try to make them laugh. I get the impression Korean men generally try to be very serious and act very tough on dates. A guy who isn't talking marriage on the first date and just seems to be out to make her laugh can be something of a different experience for her.

The woman I'm dating now seems to laugh all the time. It's a huge ego boost. I could pass gas and I swear she'd pronounce it the funniest thing she ever heard.

Cute stories about your students can keep them in stitches. Nothing is more attractive to a woman than a man who can interact with children in a cute and endearing way.

Weird cultural mind burps you've had make for good stores. Women seem to like my story about buying hotduk at the grocery store and trying to cut one open thinking it was a Korea English muffin... or the time I bought persimmons thinking they were Asian tomatoes (Asian pears, Asian tomatoes made perfect sense to me) and tried to make pasta sauce...

"Lemme tell you, that sure didn't taste like no spaghetti sauce."

Why the woman is practically throwing her winkies binkies on the table by the time I reach that punch line.

Or another one that gets them is my story about trying to make my own samgak kimbap. I'm not so good with the folding. I take a napkin and demonstrate what my samgak kimbap ends up looking like. I scrunch up a nakpin. In a cute little, humble voice I offer her my little napkin samgak kimbap "Please accept this samga... errr palgak kimbap."

Cha! It's comedy gold I tells you.

If her English isn't good, practice your Korean on her. Korean women really seem to like foreign men struggling child like with Korean. I use a very weird mostly visual mnemonic system to remember Korean words. Like the Korean word for chair I remember by picturing a chair made of rulers. "Ui" (of) + "ja" (ruler) = chair. Exit, Bee Sang Moon, I remember by picturing a bee singing a song while he flies out the exit. Then wall "byuk" I remember as "Bee... yuck". That poor bee flies right into a wall, splat, and "bee, YUCK!"

Yeah. Make 'em laugh. I think my girlfriend once noted "In Korea we have an expression, no comedian has an ugly girlfriend."

[shakuhachi]

Tonight 4 new numbers! Good luck!

[weatherman]

Are you meeting her on a Korean cultural setting, or are you meeting her on some westerner cultural setting. It makes a difference.

Dude learn Korean. I have about enough to make a conversation last about an hour, a hard hour, but yet it works. Making Korean chicks deal western isn't fun. Have yourself deal Korean.

[Newbie]

Mindmetoo got it right. Make 'em laugh and tell funny stories about you and your kindergartners.

Another important factor that may be easier said than done, is to try to limit yourself to the girls who are good at English. I have dated my fair share of women here and the ladies that have lived/studied overseas are SO much easier to date. I find that the girls I have dated with limited international experience are just out experimenting and don't really know what to make of us. They're shyness was only cute for the first year here, after that I was desperate for something more meaningful.

My most successful date was with a girl who lived in England for two years (we've been together over a year now). She got my humour, appreciated the West, and while maybe shy by western standards on the first date, much more vocal than some other first dates I had in Korea.

Of course, if you're just out for a fling, then my advice is useless. If that is all you want, just be strong and take the lead and you'll have a good chance of getting what you are looking for.

[indiercj]

[squat toilet]

[Moldy Rutabaga]

If she's looking scared, suggest a movie! You can enjoy the movie together, she can read the Korean subtitles for help, and you have something to talk about afterward. A good first date idea.

Ken:>
Dating expert. Yeah, right.

[mithridates]

[squat toilet]

[Summer Wine]

[joe_doufu]

In most foreign countries, I find that the best thing to do is an "activity date" -- go hiking, or sightseeing, or dancing, or shopping, or anything that creates a couple of hours of ongoing stimulus for conversation. In fact this is usually what I do in my home country, too. If you get sucked into a "coffee date" or a "drinks date" you are relying on your good looks and conversational ability to last the entire evening. Bad strategy!

[Corporal]

[Cedar]

I second Joe-doufu. Absolutely, activity date. Even if it's her teaching you how to make kimbap.