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Korean Job Discussion Forums
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mack the knife
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: standing right behind you...
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bits
Joined: 07 Feb 2003
Location: Daegu, South Korea
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 Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2005 8:40 pm Post subject: no grades, no detention or expulsion |
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| I had no idea that Japanese kids could completely flake through school and still graduate. I am at a hogwan, I don't know if Korean kids can do that or not. |
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Derrek
Joined: 15 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2005 9:41 pm Post subject: |
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Funny stuff.
"On the days I'm avoiding them asking me that, I'm avoiding them actually trying to grab it. I shit you not, I have to play Dodgedick with Japanese Jr. High kids on a weekly basis. Boys and girls! Age, gender, doesn't matter, they all want a stab at it. The boys are actually more persistant though. I had one boy grab for it, and when I said "No!" he put his hands together and, in English, said "Please!" Oh hell no. I was sitting next to a 12-year old boy who kept grabbing at it, and when I told him "No!" he asked "Why not?" I wondered if there weren't some cultural bounds I wasn't understsanding, so I said clearly "age 10 years and become female since birth, then we'll talk." His solution was to ask the girl sitting next to him to trade seats, grab my dick, and tell him about it.
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And this may sound familiar:
"I wish I could say it stops there, but actually, it gets worse. Let me introduce you to a game Japanese kids like to play called "Kancho."
Actually, it's not so much a "game" as it is kids clasping their hands together, sticking out their first fingers, and shoving them up your butt. I'm really not joking.
You know, before we come to Japan, they tell us a lot of ultimately useless stuff. What kind of computer to bring, if our DVD's will work, clothing sizes, that kind of nonsense. Nowhere, and I mean nowhere, in the 3-4 months of orientations did anyone ever mention that at some point, a Japanese kid may try to stick their fingers up our butt. That's something I would have liked to know, personally.
It's called Kancho, and just about any kid can be a Kancho Assassin. Even the sweetest little girl may be prone to jam her fingers up your ass the second you turn around. This happened to one of my friends, which just goes to show - don't trust anyone. I'd say the little girls are the most dangerous cause they have natural ways of lowering your defenses.
I was pretty lucky. Before I came, I bought a really big, really baggy pair of pants. The kids try to Kancho...but they just have no idea where my ass is! It's beautiful! I had one kid try and find his fingers hit nothing but jean fabric and air. Yes! But I've actually gotten pretty good at dodging it, much like Spider-man I have developed a Kancho Sense that tells me where and when it's coming before it comes. I parry fingers like a pro. My record is still 100% Kancho Free. Ha! America 2, Japan 0.
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Derrek
Joined: 15 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2005 9:51 pm Post subject: |
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Oh, and you've GOT to read this pic taken at the National History Museum in Tokyo. The author on the blog says, "Now you know why so many people are still mad at the Japanese."
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Swiss James
Joined: 26 Nov 2003
Location: Shanghai
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| Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2005 10:02 pm Post subject: |
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| Derrek wrote: |
Oh, and you've GOT to read this pic taken at the National History Museum in Tokyo. The author on the blog says, "Now you know why so many people are still mad at the Japanese."
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That's at the National History Museum? I am feeling some serious empathy with the Chinese and Koreans right now.
I have a friend who loved teaching in Japan, but told me he didn't want to sign on for his second year because he was scared he would be stabbed by some of his students.
This guy told me they were unbelievably badly behaved, reguarly violent, and totally out of control.
He also told me his theory that a lot of the girls in his classes went on "compensation dates" with businessmen so that they could afford designer handbags and such.
I took what he was telling me with a pinch of salt, but can't think of any reason as to why he would say it if it wasn't true. |
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mack the knife
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: standing right behind you...
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| Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 3:46 pm Post subject: |
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| He also told me his theory that a lot of the girls in his classes went on "compensation dates" with businessmen so that they could afford designer handbags and such |
Utterly TRUE and one of the GREAT things about Japan, according to my buddy who's lived there for 9 years. |
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gang ah jee
Joined: 14 Jan 2003
Location: city of paper
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| Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 4:02 pm Post subject: |
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| mack the knife wrote: |
| Quote: |
| He also told me his theory that a lot of the girls in his classes went on "compensation dates" with businessmen so that they could afford designer handbags and such |
Utterly TRUE and one of the GREAT things about Japan, according to my buddy who's lived there for 9 years. |
Teen prostitution is one of the 'GREAT' things about Japan? |
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Big_Bird
Joined: 31 Jan 2003
Location: Sometimes here sometimes there...
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| Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 6:27 pm Post subject: |
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This guy is really funny! I love this one:
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I Am P_nis-Man
I went back to Heiwa Jr. High for the first time since the groping incident. I was a little...what...nervous? about it, but really, it was only one kid, and I figured I could still handle one kid. I mean, after all I'm still a really big black guy. Sometimes I tend to forget that. Hey, you'd forget yourself too if all you ever saw in front of you was Japanese people. Once, I was walking in a crowded Osaka train station, and I passed something that completely freaked me the hell out...until I realized it was my reflection in a mirror. "Whoa, you don't see that shit everyday!" was my very first thought, and for an instant I completely understood all the staring.
But anyway, I digress. Heiwa Jr. High. The boy who groped me, as it would turn out, didn't pose any sort of problems at all for the week I was there. Nope, this time it would be two completely new ichinensei boys. The first is yet another Kancho Assassin...except he's really Japanese about it. I was walking around outside with the sports clubs, when I caught him sneaking up behind me with his fingers in the classic pose. I raised an eyebrow and gave him the universal "Nuh-uh" look. What happened next though, I have to say is a first for me at least.
He lifts his Kancho-ready hands, gets the "I want a bicycle for Christmas Santa!" look on his face, looks up and me and says, politely, "Is it allright to Kancho you?"
...Almost two years I've been in Japa-- no. Over 24 years I've existed on this planet, and that is most definitely the first (and hopefully the last) time I've ever had anyone *politely* ask if they may stick their fingers up my ass.
Anyway, I dealt with it accordingly...
Me: Most certainly no. You do, and it's my turn. One Thousand Years of Pain.
Him: One Thousand Years of Pain, huh?
Me: Yep. (I put my hands together in the Kancho Pose). A whole thousand years.
Him: (looking at my hands), Whoa, that's pretty big.
Me: Sure is. (leaning in closer, and whispering in his ear). ...All the way.
Now, he didn't say anything in response to that, but his face displayed the Universal Look of "Oh SHIT!" so I think he got the message.
The other boy...now, he isn't a Kancho Assassin, he has yet to even try it. No no, his problem is that he's too busy being obsessed with his own p_nis.
Ok, all little boys are somewhat fascinated with their equpiment at some point. It is a wonderful piece of machinery, I have to say. I remember being that age myself, and just the thrill of discovery, the excitement..."Whoa, what's going on here?! ...Wait a tic, you mean I can do this...by myself?! Anytime I want?! Holy shit, it's GAME ON!"
This boy however definitely takes it a step too far. He's a member of the tennis club. I was, again, walking around the sports clubs, when I came upon him and some other of the ichinensei tennis boys. "Tennis?" the boy says in English (as opposed to the Japanese - tenisu) while holding up his racket. I smile, starting to think that maybe, just maybe, I'm starting to make a difference here. "Yes! Tennis!" I excitedly exclaim. The boy holds up his racket again. "P_nis?"
....Sigh.
No, not p_nis, tennis. I try to correct him. He makes sure to correct me by putting the racket between his legs and swinging it around, grinning and exclaiming "P_nis! P_nis!"
You wish kid.
When I finally went to the ichinensei's class...there was a little time before the bell, so the boy challenged me to a game of Paper, Rock, Scissors (called Janken in Japan). I threw scissors which beat his paper. Jokingly, I beheld the scissors and said "Ah, the power of scissors." For round two, his rock beat my scissors. In a similar manner, he beheld his rock, and I kind of thought he was going to say "Ah, the power of rock." Nope. What he did say was "Ah, the power of my p_nis", and I just found myself thankful he didn't actually whip it out. I have no idea what counters P_nis (well, theoretically scissors, but that's *just wrong*).
Later, during class, at one point he randomly shouted out "I am P_nis-Man!" I gave him a strange look, and he said "You don't really say that in America, huh?" ...No, I don't suppose we do. What kind of fucked up superhero is that?! Boy, the Justice League really is scraping the bottom of the barrel now.
Superman: Okay, Lex Luthor is starting shit again, so we gotta go take care of business. Batman, you run some scenarios in that supercomputer of yours. Wonder Woman, you fly in with your invisible plane and do some recon. P_nis-Man, be prepared to slap any bitches that step out of line....
Aquaman: Oh, what about me!? What about me!?
Superman: Um...you stay here. Guard the headquarters...y'know...just in case any giant octopuses decide to attack...
Aquaman: ...In the middle of Manhattan?
Superman: Well, you just never know.
But guess what his new nickname is now.
Then, after class, the boy got up and starting walking towards the back of the room....but doing so by thrusting his crotch forward with every step, and doing the Degeneration-X crotch-chop/highlight with every step. As weird as this was, I found myself thanking my Lucky Charms that it's his p_nis he's so fascinated with, not mine.
Welcome to Japan.
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RobotTeacher
Joined: 16 Mar 2005
Location: I'm a Seoul Man
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| Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 6:43 pm Post subject: |
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Thank you. I just lost an hour and a half and laughed myself sick.
That's great.
*smiles and wanders off, happily knowing no little boy is going to try to stick a finger up......there*
Makes you feel a little better about life in general around here, nyet? |
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mack the knife
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: standing right behind you...
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| Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 7:35 pm Post subject: |
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| Teen prostitution is one of the 'GREAT' things about Japan? |
Yes!!  |
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Bulsajo
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 8:02 pm Post subject: |
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| What is the current Janglish meaning of "sponsor"? |
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mack the knife
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: standing right behind you...
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| Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 9:17 pm Post subject: |
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| The Bul is back!! Where u been, sucka? |
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gang ah jee
Joined: 14 Jan 2003
Location: city of paper
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| Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2005 4:46 am Post subject: |
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| mack the knife wrote: |
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| Teen prostitution is one of the 'GREAT' things about Japan? |
Yes!! |
don't you teach secondary school?
ugh. |
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jajdude
Joined: 18 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2005 8:30 am Post subject: |
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| Japan seems kinda perverted |
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Guri Guy
Joined: 07 Sep 2003
Location: Bamboo Island
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| Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2005 8:37 am Post subject: |
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| Check out Child pornography production and child pornography web site hosting on the internet. South Korea is number 3 in the world. Korea is much more perverted than Japan. If you don't believe me, do a search on Dave's for my posts on the subject. Don't be fooled. Korea is not a conservative society that people think it is. |
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