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Are all single, English-speaking K-girls Christian weirdos?
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Yu_Bum_suk



Joined: 25 Dec 2004

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 4:20 am    Post subject: Are all single, English-speaking K-girls Christian weirdos? Reply with quote

So my high school students set me up with their Korean hogwan teacher. Not only is that a very cute and sweet thing to do, but also a potential source of dates I had never even thought of. Talking to her over the phone I couldn't believe how clear her English was, especially compared to every other Engerish teacher I've met in my town. We agree to meet at the most prominent hang-out in town, though she does want to make it a really early dinner for some reason.

She's there right at 5.15, not bad looking for someone who's around her expiry date and wearing too much make-up, and seems very friendly and eager to meet me. We begin talking and even before she asks me how old I am she wants to know if I go to church. After failing yet again to explain to a Korean what a Unitarian is, I get to wait as she gets a call and its from her Deacon at church. We have to meet so early, you see, because she has to be at church at 7.45 to play piano in the worship band.

As it turns out, the most prominent hang-out in town is also the most conspicuous, and no less than about 50 of my students pass by our corner window table peering with the curiousity of soap-opera adicts. I can only imagine what school's going to be like tomorrow. I can see handphones coming out and the texting starting, and within about 20 minutes every table in the pizza shop with a site-line of mine has been taken by captive audience members. One girl who always wants to eat at the cafeteria with me looks quite heart-broken.

Anyways, back to our Jesus-lover. She's had another call come in, this time from someone at Camp Walker where she also plays in the church worship band. Dinner is interrupted by another call from a church member and several tirps to the loo, as she casually informs me that she 'has to go to the bathroom a lot'. Oh well. I'm all to happy to finish our pizza and take her up on her suggestion of going for a walk. She seems interested that I'm carrying a bag with some computer speakers I just bought before meeting up with her.

'That must be really heavy' she remarks.

'No, not really'.

'Oh look, that's my church coming up. Why don't we stop in and you can drop it off' she suggests.

As she stears me towards the church I can see it looks empty, but she pulls out a set of keys. It's dark, awkward, uncomfortable, and I suddenly have a better idea of how a fridgid girl feels myopically following some guy's impropable reason for having to get into the back seat of his car.

With the speakers safely secured and a tour of the unlit church over we're off to walk in no particular direction around town randomely bumping into my students. We finally make our destination the town park, where, of course, more of my students are hanging out.

Then she starts getting a bit weirder on me. I really need a cigarette, despite the fact I know it wouldn't make a very impression - but I no longer care about making a good impression on her anymore. But as I light up she tells me that she's a closet smoker. OK. Then she starts finding excuses for us to touch. This culminates with her developing a fever and wanting me to feel her forhead. Then the handphone rings again.

Another call from a friend at church consumes the rest of our time at the park, and then we're finally back to church to pick up my speakers, but not before stopping at the toilets again where I get to wait holding her handbag. Crossing every near traffic-less road in our town she wants to grab on to my arm for security. As we arrive at church the excuses to touch stop, and they're getting things ready for the service. Fortunately her opportunities to show me off are minimal, and I'm off to make my escape back home. I suppose that like a teenager who only got to first or second base on a date, she at least has something to brag about to her friends.


I guess she's a nice enough person, but what is it about Christianity that fucks up Korean women in such a particularly bad way? And why are 90% of fluent English-speaking women in this country screwed-up God-botherers who don't know what the hell they really want?
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joe_doufu



Joined: 09 May 2005
Location: Elsewhere

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 4:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I know... my co-worker is one of those. A "10" in looks, at least from behind, but she could never love another man like she loves Jesus.
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crazylemongirl



Joined: 23 Mar 2003
Location: almost there...

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 5:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh my god could you be any stupider? Don't mix your personal and professional life. Don't date anywhere that your students can see you and don't date anyone that either your students or teachers know unless you pretty sure it's going to go all the way ie. marriage.

If it goes badly then your the pig foreigner who broke her heart.

If it goes well (erm a little to well) then you are the pig foreigner who got in a precious christians girls panties then you are in for trouble.

Public schools are very conservative and this sort of stuff doesn't look good on you. Not from the parents point of view, as well as the staff. Gossip like this will turn around and bite you in the ass big time later on. Sucks I know, but they don't play by our rules.
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Dan The Chainsawman



Joined: 05 May 2005

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 5:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I be siding with dee lemon gal on dis piece of messy business mon, now pass dee dutchy!
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djsmnc



Joined: 20 Jan 2003
Location: Dave's ESL Cafe

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 5:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sounds like a case of "minister's daughter" syndrome. Could be a lot of fun, depending on what kinds of things she has stored in her closet...Go with it!
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Bo Peabody



Joined: 25 Aug 2005

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 5:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

[deleted]

Last edited by Bo Peabody on Tue Sep 26, 2006 1:11 pm; edited 1 time in total
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sheba



Joined: 16 May 2005
Location: Here there and everywhere!

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 6:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Given you attitude toward the whole thing, Id say shes lucky never to see you again.
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chiaa



Joined: 23 Aug 2003

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 6:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Church is nothing but a club to Koreans (a great deal of the time). Koreans feel they have to belong to some kind of group, be it church or something with their university. I am not saying this in a negative manner, its just the way it is.

A good friend of mine does this really smart thing on the first couple of dates with a woman. As the date begins he pulls out his phone and says let's turn off our phones. I believe every single girl has done that thus far.
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crazylemongirl



Joined: 23 Mar 2003
Location: almost there...

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 6:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

chiaa wrote:


A good friend of mine does this really smart thing on the first couple of dates with a woman. As the date begins he pulls out his phone and says let's turn off our phones. I believe every single girl has done that thus far.


classy guy. Answering your phone during a date = bad form.
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AdamH



Joined: 27 Aug 2004
Location: Bachman Turner Overdrive...Let's Rock!

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 6:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ha ha! So that's the kind of stuff you get up to down in that "little town south of Daegu", YBS.

DID you touch her forehead when directed to do so? A little rule of thumb for you: If your hand comes away with enough foundation/concealer/mascara/whatever it's called to patch up a 1974 Lincoln, get well away. Who knows what else she's hiding. She could be a man.


Coincidentally, I too was accosted by a couple of suspicious-looking Korean women of about my age as I was walking from the bus to this PC room this evening.

It started off as the usual story, Whitey (that's me) walks nonchalantly along the pavement, head up and brisk enough to look like I know what I'm doing and not seem too much like easy prey. A perfect two beats after I pass the staring Koreans, the inevitable occurs, right on cue:

Korean girls: Excuuus-uh meeee!
Whitey, not wishing to appear rude, comes to a halt and turns 90 degrees to the left.
K: (flustered, overly-smiley, running to face me) Helloooo, Hi-eeee!
W: Annyeong haseyo.
K: (In Korean) Oh, you can speak Korean language?
W: (In Korean) I can speak a little Korean.
(K rattle on in mixed English/Korean about how great it is that W can speak Korean, and how humble their own skills are)

At this point, it was 50/50 in my mind whether they were about to hit me for free English lessons or start describing my life's sins from the bible, which I noticed was among the selection of books in one girl's arms.

K: Oh wow! Do you live here <area name>?
W: Yes, I live nearby.
K: (smiles and general look of of a fisherman who has just heard his bait alarm go off) Ooh, where are you going now? Are you busy?
W: I'm going to the PC ��. (Motions in direction away from them)
K: Are you a teacher? Language academy? Where? (extremely enthusiastic come-hither smiles and wide eyes)
W: I am a teacher at an English school, in (name of next part of town).
K: (Look of two teacher's pet students who have just been invited to carry Teacher's books)
Do you go to church?
W: (Thinking: Bingo, here it is!) No, I don't go to church.
K: (look of salesmen trying to sell a car to a lottery winner) Do you believe in God?
W: Not really.
K: We are studying history of religion...are you busy now? You, teacher, like to meet church people (motion and general confused mix of English and Korean with the gist that they want me to come with them to a church somewhere a couple of streets away)
W: Sorry, I must go, I am busy.
K: (Giggling like new Ann Summer's agents finding out that they've turned up at the house of a boy they used to go to school with) You come to meet church people, yes?
W: I am sorry, I must go now. Pleased to meet you.
K: (polite bow, smiles and giggles): Pleased to meet you, goodbyeeee!

The moral/point of the story is not that you should avoid churchy people; nor that you shouldn't ever stop for strangers, regardless of gender; nor even that prim Christian girls don't give head, as the look in their eyes said otherwise, but that MY KOREAN SKILLS ARE KICK-ASS! I walked away from the situation with no greater feeling than the satisfaction of one who, with minimal skills, has somehow managed to successfully bullsh1t their way through a meeting.
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Captain Corea



Joined: 28 Feb 2005
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 6:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

djsmnc wrote:
Sounds like a case of "minister's daughter" syndrome. Could be a lot of fun, depending on what kinds of things she has stored in her closet...Go with it!


My wife's father is a minister.


I'm glad we can't speak the same language Wink
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Cedar



Joined: 11 Mar 2003
Location: In front of my computer, again.

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 7:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Actually, this is true of many of the single, interesting, intelligent men in this country, too. In my experience, run. You cannot get the Christian brain-washing out of them if they don't want to get it out themselves.
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Yu_Bum_suk



Joined: 25 Dec 2004

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 4:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

crazylemongirl wrote:
Oh my god could you be any stupider?


Perhaps not. My story so far is that we were just meeting to discuss teaching English. I have some of her students at 3.00 so we'll see if she's told them anything.
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Yu_Bum_suk



Joined: 25 Dec 2004

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 4:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

AdamH wrote:

Coincidentally, I too was accosted by a couple of suspicious-looking Korean women of about my age as I was walking from the bus to this PC room this evening.


I think for some of them it must be the thrill of having a legitimate excuse to talk to a foreign guy. A Korean athiest approaching you for anything other than free English lessons is just a *beep*.

I wonder if there was actually anyone at their church of if they just wanted to be alone with you in a dark religous place to gratify some Korean fetish I don't know the name for.
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Hollywoodaction



Joined: 02 Jul 2004

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 6:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, it's obvious the girl likes you.

So what if she's Christian? Aren't you a Christian? Has that ever stopped you from doing anything? Laughing
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