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mindmetoo
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
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Posted: Thu Mar 09, 2006 11:25 pm Post subject: |
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Tangentially to the topic, another Mars probe is about to orbit. Should it be lost, I always think of this usenet oldie but goodie. A handy flow chart to explain any mysterious loss for the mars mission (obviously Carl Sagan and Mir are both so much carbon). Are you reading Igotthisguitar?
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BEGIN CONSPIRACY
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DOES GLOBAL SURVEYOR BLOW UP ON LAUNCH PAD?
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NO YES
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| WAS A FLASH OF LIGHT SEEN?
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| NO YES
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| CARL SAGAN PLANTED CIA USED LASER GUN TO
| BOMB IN FUEL CELL BLOW UP ROCKET
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DOES THIRD STAGE BOOSTER FAIL TO FIRE WHEN IN EARTH ORBIT?
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NO YES
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| WAS SPACE STATION MIR WITHIN LINE OF SIGHT?
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| NO YES
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| GREYS USED MICROWAVE KGB/CIA USED ASAT
| GUN TO KNOCK MISSILE TO TAKE OUT
| OUT BOOSTER BOOSTER
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DOES GLOBAL SURVEYOR "VANISH" ENROUTE TO MARS?
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NO YES
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| DID GLOBAL SURVEYOR "VANISH" NEAR EARTH'S MOON?
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| NO YES
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| | GREYS USE RAIL GUN BUILT AT MOON BASE
| | LEASED FROM TRUMAN IN 1946 TO KNOCK
| | OUT GLOBAL SURVEYOR
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| DOES HAM RADIO OPERATOR POST ANONYMOUS
| MESSAGE ON ALT.CONSPIRACY CLAIMING TO
| STILL PICK UP SURVEYOR'S TELEMETRY?
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| NO YES
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| GREYS USE "SPORT MODEL" NSA EXPLOITED BACKDOOR
| UFO TO CAPTURE SURVEYOR AND ARE RE-DIRECTING
| SURVEYOR TO RENDEZVOUS
DOES GLOBAL SURVEYOR FAIL TO WITH "COMET" HALE-BOPP. DNA
ENTER MARS ORBIT? CODES OF ALL HUMAN BEINGS
| | LOADED ON SURVEYOR COMPUTERS
NO YES ARE GIVEN TO REPTOIDS SO THEY
| | CAN PICK WHICH HUMANS THEY
| DID LAST SURVEYOR PHOTOS WANT TO BEGIN EATING WHEN THEY
| SHOW STRANGE FLASH NEAR ARRIVE IN ORBIT
| MARS' MOON PHOBOS?
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| NO YES -- NAZIS OCCUPYING LOVE BASE ON
| | PHOBOS SHOOT DOWN SURVEYOR WITH
| | V29 PROTON MISSILE
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| LAST PHOTOS "ACCIDENTALLY MISFILED"
| WITH SOVIET SPY SATELLITE PICTURES
| OF NEIL ARMSTRONG PLAYING GOLF
| IN FLORIDA WHEN HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE
| ON THE MOON
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DOES GLOBAL SURVEYOR "VANISH" SHORTLY AFTER ARRIVING IN ORBIT?
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NO YES
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| DID SURVEYOR VANISH BEFORE TAKING PHOTOS OF CYDONIA REGION?
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| NO YES
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| DO PHOTOS OF CYDONIA SURVEYOR SHOT DOWN BY
>---------> CONFIRM FACE IS MADE BY LASER GUN IN MARS "FACE"
INTELLIGENT BEINGS?
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NO YES
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| CARL SAGAN FIRED
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PHOTOS FAKED BY STEVEN SPIELBERG (KNOWN JEW,
SPREADER OF HOLOCAUST LIE, BANKROLLER OF NIZKOR,
AND PAID UFO DISINFORMANT) WERE PRE-LOADED ONTO
SURVEYOR BY AGENTS OF MJ12. PUBLIC OPINION TURNS
AGAINST UFO BELIEVERS AND THEY ARE ROUNDED UP BY
BATF THUGS AND PUT INTO CAMPS. REPTOIDS ARRIVE
AND BEGIN TURNING VIEWERS OF THE LEARNING
CHANNEL AND PBS IN SOYENT GREEN.
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Ya-ta Boy
Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Location: Established in 1994
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Posted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 4:02 am Post subject: |
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While I am happy to know the furry lobster would fit perfectly on a salad plate, it didn't look all that appetizing to me. |
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mindmetoo
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
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Posted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 4:13 am Post subject: |
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Ya-ta Boy wrote: |
While I am happy to know the furry lobster would fit perfectly on a salad plate, it didn't look all that appetizing to me. |
I wonder if the strange bacteria that lives in its fur has medical applications in the future. Could be the cure for cancer living right there! |
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jinglejangle

Joined: 19 Feb 2005 Location: Far far far away.
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Posted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 10:14 pm Post subject: |
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Ya-ta Boy wrote: |
While I am happy to know the furry lobster would fit perfectly on a salad plate, it didn't look all that appetizing to me. |
Hmm... Well, all I can say is that regular lobsters don't look appetizing either, but I've been conditioned to know that they mean a tasty treat! |
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