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Korean Job Discussion Forums "The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
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Cedar
Joined: 11 Mar 2003 Location: In front of my computer, again.
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 6:30 am Post subject: |
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Give me a Korean man over a Western man anyday of the week. I can leave the reasons to your own imagination, so as not to hurt anyone's feelings.
And I mean hurting the feelings of the Western men on this board.
The reality is that Western men will continue to feel they are superior and better catches... yet many of them find Korean women preferable to Western women. So, why can't they imagine that in fact a Western woman might see things their way, but with the sexes reversed? |
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matko
Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Location: in a world of hurt!
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 6:42 am Post subject: |
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Why the shot at western men?
I don't care really. What do you find so great about Korean men? Not your boyfriend of course. What I want to know is how (if this is the case) you enjoy being treated like a Korean woman?
If you get treated differently because you are western, how can you justify your post?
Give us details. |
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Cedar
Joined: 11 Mar 2003 Location: In front of my computer, again.
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 6:47 am Post subject: |
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the dig on Western men is cause of the posts on page 3 that are dissing Korean men, and this entire thread frequently mentions sexism and what have you. many of the problems with Korea mentioned so far are specifically aimed at the behaviour of Korean men. I guess I don't find Western men to be so perfect!
Nor Western culture. I am a guest in Korea, and I think I should take the lumps with the sugar and deal, rather than complaining about the OBVIOUS. Like as if I need to hear someone dis spitting one more time. What, I never heard of that or thought of that before on my own? |
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Corporal
Joined: 25 Jan 2003
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 7:09 am Post subject: |
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Rand Al Thor wrote: |
every person with Korean blood in them is Korean even if they can't speak Korean and are 3rd or 4th generation Canadian/American/Australian/ or whatever |
This does make sense according to the way Koreans view things, but so far it hasn't been my personal experience. My daughter is one month old, and so far all the Koreans who have seen her, and there have been plenty, have commented either that a she looks like me, and not her father, or b she looks like a foreign baby. In a nice way, mind you, like, "oh, what a cute waygook baby", but still, no one has ever observed that she has any Korean features or resembles her father at all.
Then there is my mother in law, who asked me if I thought the baby was beautiful, and when I replied, "yes," asked, "why?"
just rambling I guess now...it's been peeving me lately... |
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Corporal
Joined: 25 Jan 2003
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 7:11 am Post subject: |
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Ok, those weren't supposed to be smilies in there, but whatever. |
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Ody1966 Guest
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 7:45 am Post subject: |
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hi corporal,
my son was born in nyc where the population is diverse.
for the first several years of his life, we were amused constantly by the different perceptions asains and westerners (black and white) had of his appearence (of course all commented that he was beautiful, as most babies are).
when i took him out, westerners would ask if i had adopted a chinese baby, conversely, koreans would be shocked to see this white child call my husband daddy (playing in central park for example).
your daughter is beautiful. i'm sure your mother-in-law sees that. she probably is sincerely trying to measure her physical prowess using a new scale, asking you for the perimeters.
has she been helpful otherwise?
~ody |
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Len8
Joined: 12 Feb 2003 Location: Kyungju
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 11:14 am Post subject: Alright alright, let's be negative about korea then. |
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Randal Thors comment about all Koreans, third second or whatever generation are Koreans is fine up to a point, but what about the Afro Koreans? There are a lot of them in korea, compliments of the U.S. military. |
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jaderedux
Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Location: Lurking outside Seoul
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 1:40 pm Post subject: |
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Give me a Korean man over a Western man anyday of the week. I can leave the reasons to your own imagination, so as not to hurt anyone's feelings |
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can leave the reasons to your own imagination, |
Kudos on that comment. I vote with YOU on that one....!
I think on an individual basis Korean men can be delightful. I am in very serious relationship with one and he is kind, gentle and I feel very blessed. Yes we struggle with problems of my perceptions of how I think life should go.
To be honest with his very very conservative parents who surprisingly have been supportive once they realized he was serious I am more demure than I would be back home. But in "our" home we are pretty equal.
I dont' think however the legal system makes it very easy here. I still see a lot of sexism in the work place. The laws here heavily favor men. Sexual harrassment is de riguer. I have alot of Korean female friends which is where I get most o of this information and observing the men at work.
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I guess I don't find Western men to be so perfect! |
Actually I find men in general a quandry....everywhere! I think it is meant to be that way. My personal proof God has a sense of humor.
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I am a guest in Korea, and I think I should take the lumps with the sugar and deal, rather than complaining about the OBVIOUS. |
I have said this many times and agree with it 99%. Being American it gets harder but my theory is "show" those I meet the best person I can be so that I am good example and be the best of what Americans can be....crap I sound like an AFN COMMERCIAL.
The good part about whining and grousing here is that it lets off steam and sometimes no matter where you live it is good for you. Better to let off a little rant here and stomp and harumph a bit, than do it in public. Heck everyone has a bad day...so go on and whine here. But best to leave it here too.
And THE SPITTING DRIVES ME CRAZY!!!!
Y'all have a good day!
Jade |
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The Great Wall of Whiner
Joined: 24 Jan 2003 Location: Middle Land
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 2:01 pm Post subject: |
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Cedar Wrote:
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the dig on Western men is cause of the posts on page 3 that are dissing Korean men |
Korean people....
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and this entire thread frequently mentions sexism and what have you. |
Do you deny it doesn't exist?
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many of the problems with Korea mentioned so far are specifically aimed at the behaviour of Korean men. |
Because men, of all nationalities, are more apt to use anti-social behaviour.
If you want to hear me berrate Korean females, I have a list the length of my arm.... |
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cubase
Joined: 28 Apr 2003
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 4:09 pm Post subject: |
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I am a guest in Korea, and I think I should take the lumps with the sugar and deal, rather than complaining about the OBVIOUS |
Cedar:
I have been in Korea for many years. I'm a Korean taxpayer. I am a member of the community. I have family here.
I deeply resent being called a "guest". I challenge you to go up to a 1st generation immigrant and tell them they're a "guest" and therefore less free to express their opinions about their new culture. See how far you get. |
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cheem
Joined: 18 Apr 2003
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 4:26 pm Post subject: |
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Er, she said "I am a guest in Korea" not "You are a guest in Korea". Why are you being so sensitive? Chill. |
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cubase
Joined: 28 Apr 2003
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 4:37 pm Post subject: |
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Because Cedar's comments in this thread have indicated that she believes that it's out of line for us as foreign residents to vent like we are.
Cedar, too, has been in Korea for many years, and even says she's fluent in the local language. Yet she thinks she's a guest. She's not.
Cedar has been a contributing member of the foreign community for a long time. She's a great photographer, writer, and by all accounts a great person. But I disagree with her views on this. |
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Trinny
Joined: 01 Feb 2003
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 4:48 pm Post subject: |
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Men are men, whether he is a Korean/Canadian/American.
Women are women, whether she is a Korean/Canadian/American.
I just came to this conclusion, after a recent experience of seeing my friends breaking up. |
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Cedar
Joined: 11 Mar 2003 Location: In front of my computer, again.
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 7:55 pm Post subject: |
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Well, I'd like to feel I was as Korean as the next guy. I tried one time to tell a little kid, look you were born in 1997. I was in Korea in 1996. So I am more Korean than you are. The kid didn't buy it. No one is going to buy it. In many ways, yes, I consider myself an immigrant. This is my home, I love it here, I want to continue to live here, I pay my taxes and all that, too. But as long as Koreans continue to think of me as a guest here as a foreigner here (and that even includes good friends) then, well, I can be bitter and fight it, or I can just take it as one of the lumps in my existence and deal with it.
It's not that I can't see the problems with this country. It's that I don't think it's appropriate for me to b***h about them in public (and this site is public in my opinion, esp. since almost all the members are using aliases so who even knows who they are!). I think as long as I choose to live here, I just have to deal with the problems as I see fit. Sometimes I try to provide an example, sometimes I might lecture or spout off about something, sometimes I b***h someone out (in Korean if that's what it takes).
But if there is one thing I know, it's that if a newby to Korea sees some complaint in this thread, they may have never thought of the issue before, but the next day- they see what the poster meant. Maybe it starts to bother them, too. Complaints are like a vicious spreading disease. |
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crazylemongirl
Joined: 23 Mar 2003 Location: almost there...
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Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2003 7:59 pm Post subject: |
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Ok,
What I don't like about korea after almost three months:
The smell of bondaeggi and Squid on the street stalls. Every time I walk past one I want to chunder.
Obbsession with personal apperance. I get the 'why don't you wear make up' question from people all the frikin' time, (they also think I should wear it on my arms to cover up my freckles). I was going to try and explain the concept of a 'tom boy' to my co-workers but I think that they think that I am way too weird as it is (as I mistakenly told them I didn't want to get married when I first arrived).
An education system that rewards conformity at all costs... I thought that the NZ system was regimented until I came here.
The fact that they'll let their kids get away with just about anything. But at the same time some of my kids arrive at school with some nasty looking injuries which I'm sure aren't from normal childhood tomfoolery, hijinks etc.
Ok and this one is going to annoy some people. But the 'I'm so superior as I've been here for X years' attuide displayed by some expat teachers towards newbies when they ask for advice (however by the same token I've benefited from some great hints and tips from some not so highly strung long termers).
The toilets. Leaving aside the whole squat pot thing (which is another hate), the toilets here are disgusting.
Anti-americanism. Although I still maintain that after 'where is the toilet,' 'I'm not american' is one of the most useful phrases in any language to learn... I've never been verbally abused and shoved by someone because of the colour of my skin.
Foot paths with potholes, bits sticking out of nowhere etc. I had many twisted ankles and grazes on my knees because of this (though it's getting better).
The do nothing attuide to people in need esp to women/disabled/children/ anyone who is not ethincally pure.
CLG |
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