Korean Job Discussion Forums

[bogey666]

Real questions about Canada !

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Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions people from all over the world are asking. Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked!

Q:I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? ( England )
A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.
Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.

Q:I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the Railroad tracks?(Sweden )


A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada ? ( Sweden )
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada ? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto , Vancouver , Edmonton and Halifax ? (England )
A: What, did your last slave die?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA )
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is
every Tuesday night in Calgary . Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA )
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get
here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada ?( England )
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do .

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )
A : Aus-t ri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in Canada ? ( Germany )
A: Why? We don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.
Where can I sell it in Canada ? ( USA )
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada ? ( USA )
A: Only at Thanksgiving.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)


A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA )
A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.

[oldtactics]

These are brilliant - A friend of mine moved to Pittsburgh from Toronto when we were in highschool and kids at his new school asked him if he had an igloo. They were shocked when he told them that the two cities have pretty much the same weather.

The transportation department at my mom's office also gets a lot of "I need a truck from Houston to Ontario" from educated but ignorant people who seem to think that there's only one city in the entire province.

[Chuvok]

[oldtactics]

Toronto to Vancouver isn't anywhere near 4000 miles anyway, I think it might just be a random over-exaggeration.

[Underwaterbob]

My mother worked in customs in Nova Scotia, which is further south than some parts of the US, when she was in University. Inevitably, during the summer some Americans would show up with their skis strapped to the top of their car asking where the nearest ski hill was. I think on average they're better informed now.

[RACETRAITOR]

A friend of mine worked in a comic book store in West Edmonton Mall. One day two stoners came in. One of them remarked "Wow, I never knew Montana was so huge! When do we reach Canada?" My friend told them to drive another five or six hours north.

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt if you don't know where Edmonton is. It's three hours north of Calgary which is about three hours north of the border.

The Americans paid my friend for their purchases in US dollars. He gave them their change in Canadian dollars and kept the difference.

[ajgeddes]

[ajgeddes]

[lille]

Aag, seriously? I got this in an email forward like ten years ago. Nice work passing it off as an Olympic joke though - real topical.

[mises]

[mole]

I'm reading a book [Awakening the Buddha Within, but that's irrelevant.]
Marked price is US $15.95 / $24.95 CAN.
Why are books so much more expensive up there?

[RACETRAITOR]

[lille]

I don't buy it. I've heard that joke before. Anytime some Canadian needs an ice breaker at the bar, they invoke some Second Cousin Steve to tell that story about.

[NightSky]

[aquaponics08]

Canada, what state is that in?!?