Korean Job Discussion Forums

[bjonothan]

Actually I would listen to the latter options...In the end you have documented evidence to show that you were just giving friendly advice to her. No repercussions for you in the long run......

[Ya-ta Boy]

I think a lot of the posters here are forgetting that they are not back home. The cultural norms/rules are not the same here, especially about teachers. (I was invited to spend a night at an adult student's home. Guess where I slept. With two kids: the boy was 12 and the girl was 10. And I don't mean we slept in a room with beds. The three of us shared a yo on the floor.) I asked my student if this arrangement was normal. He said it is a kind of 'honor' for the kids to share their bed with a guest.

On to the situation at hand:

Since this is a one-on-one class, I don't see any problem with discussing this issue with the girl. Younger Koreans are constantly asking for 'advice'. I suggest you do use your best common sense when discussing the topic. Since she is 15 (which probably means she is 14) I think you can suggest things like group movie dates. Some posters suggested she also talk to her mother and her friends. I think that is positive advice.

I would also come to class with several other topics in mind so her teenage romance doesn't become the only topic discussed.

[peppermint]

I think, if anything, thre would be more reason to worry here. There is a perception that many male teachers come here for the women, and schoolgirl/teacher crushes seem very common place. It's not uncommon for me to hear girls say they met their boyfriend when he was tutoring or teaching them.

[Ya-ta Boy]

I think we'll have to agree to disagree on this one, Ms. Peppermint.

[Guest]

As for me, I'm not forgetting where I am ... whether that means I know or don't know, or accept or ignore the cultural norms aren't relevant. The information is still what I think or believe. I stand by my opinion. As for teachers coming here for women. I will go out on a limb and say that the great, extreme, high-end, upper peer majority of people coming here aren't here to date or "do" the 14 and 15 year old girls. Yes, I have had the girls with the crushes on me with gifts, e-mails, and so on, they are short lived, easy to deal with and clear up, and the like. Despite the fact that I have seen some teen girls here that certainly look well over their age and are are actually very beautiful ... I'm not a moron pedophile. I've not "had to control an urge" or this or that ... so to suggest that is why so many come here .... umm yea, sounds like transference maybe ? A teacher is a teacher (yes, there are exceptions) and you, as a teacher, have a responsibilty, to, hmm, uhhh, what's the word ? .............. educate ! That's it, educate.

Education and the role of the teacher has never been confined to the subject or focus of the class. A teacher should be and always has been there to mold the mind, morals, instill ethics, and protect the student (through edcuation) as it relates to drugs, sex, culture, abuse, etc. That's always been an accepted and should remain, and accepted role.

[TheUrbanMyth]

There is a difference between being a fear-monger and putting yourself in a situation where you could be deported and banned from Korea...or worse. It is inappropriate, clear and simple.