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Konglishman
Joined: 14 Sep 2007
Location: Nanjing
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 Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 4:28 pm Post subject: Re: Rejected as a patient for refusing my K Dr's advances.. |
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| Moondoggy wrote: |
| Feloria wrote: |
I can't believe this--
About a week ago, my Dr. started calling me at home asking me to go drinking with him to discuss his marriage problems.
We had never had any kind of personal or overly friendly relationship before; he just started calling me out of the blue.
About an hour ago, he called again wanting me to cancel my plans and meet him--he was obviously a bit drunk. I told him I wasn't going to cancel my plans. He then said "OK, I gave you a chance-- don't come to my clinic anymore, you are not my patient." He then said "F---- you", and hung up on me!!
What the hell?? This sucks because he is the Dr. that pretty much all of the foreigners go to out here. He's a 10 minute walk from the University where I work.
And of course, I have no recourse...
Has anything like this happened to anyone else? |
do you seriously believe that daves esl forum can offer some suggestions to help you with the situation? or just want to talk about how you feel or know about how others feel? don't you friends to talk to? or just trolling? |
Clearly, you are not a very friendly doggy. You never even try to add anything helpful any discussion... Wow, I had no idea that trolling for trolls could be so fun. |
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Konglishman
Joined: 14 Sep 2007
Location: Nanjing
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| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 4:34 pm Post subject: |
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| Feloria wrote: |
First off--I don't live in a big city; as I mentioned before he is the main doc that 90% of the foreigners go to.
I've already decided to sever all ties, and of course I have friends to talk to about this--but it is a very small community and I'm not into the whole "shaming"thing as a punitive measure.
The truth is, he has some serious anger problems--he told me last night that he was so angry at a family member that he wanted to "blow his (the family member's) brains out." He had expressed how angry he was other times we talked, too, as well as staying out all night drinking binges.
I was a counselor back in the States, and because of this I did agree to meet with him for an hour, but at a coffee shop or something and I would not be drinking alcohol and that he shouldn't either.
He then became very angry that I wouldn't meet with him longer--this was at around 9:30pm--it was at this point he swore at me and told me to never come and see him again.
I find myself genuinely concerned about his well being, and that of his patients.
I do know that his supervisor is American and works at a hospital up in Seoul, (I do know the hospital name)
Other than trying to contact him and express my concern, I don't know what else I can do. Maybe just do nothing.
All of this had just happened when I did the original post, I was shocked and angry--now I just feel sick....... |
Before you take that step, I would suggest giving the guy a little time (maybe a week) to cool off. Then, ask if you can meet him again. Of course, be sure to bring a friend along. Maybe, he will be more reasonable next time. And if not, then your idea of contacting his supervisor would be the only thing left to do. |
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Feloria
Joined: 02 Sep 2006
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| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 5:09 pm Post subject: |
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Of course it doesn't happen only in Korea; but is is happening to me IN Korea-and recourse here is not the same as elsewhere.
Swampfox--I wish I could "like" your comment; oh I guess I just did |
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newb
Joined: 27 Aug 2012
Location: Korea
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| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 5:44 pm Post subject: |
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Unbelievable!  |
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fermentation
Joined: 22 Jun 2009
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| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 5:57 pm Post subject: |
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| Be careful with these wackjobs. A couple days ago a delivery man kept texting and calling my girlfriend that he wanted to deliver the package in person, at 10pm no less, despite her telling him repeatedly to just drop it off at the security office. Cut off all contact. You don't want things turning rapey. |
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cj1976
Joined: 26 Oct 2005
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| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 7:35 pm Post subject: |
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I say you should go for it. He is a doctor so he is probably loaded. Also, think of the free prescription drugs you could blag.
I'm kidding - what you should actually do is try to get some proof of his unprofessional and totally unethical behaviour, and report him. If it isn't you he is coming on to like this, then it will be some other poor lass. |
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nero
Joined: 11 Mar 2009
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| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 7:45 pm Post subject: |
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Stay the f away from him. I have dealt with enough stalkers and weirdos of both sexes to know that he doesn't want to change his behaviour, he wants your attention. Next step (after being ignored) he threatens to kill himself.
Don't make it your problem. You will gain nothing from the situation. You are not his saviour.
I can't believe you met him for one hour to begin with. Again, you gave him attention, now you're pretty much screwed.
BTW, who told you 90% of foreigners go to this guy? I have been in Korea a long time and know a lot of people and very few people I know have one doctor. There are a myriad of doctors in Seoul.
IGNORE IGNORE IGNORE
If he turns nasty..
REPORT REPORT REPORT
Do not talk to him even to see how he his. |
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lemak
Joined: 02 Jan 2011
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| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 8:01 pm Post subject: |
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| EZE wrote: |
| It sounds like he`s a creep and not someone you`d want to have touching your body anyway. Some ladies will still be going to this doctor, so consider yourself lucky he isn`t your doctor anymore. |
This. Better to find out early that he's a creepy scuzzball than to wait until you're in the clinic one day and he's poking around in your nether regions looking for the source of your earache. |
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Feloria
Joined: 02 Sep 2006
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| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 9:52 pm Post subject: |
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I didn't actually meet him. I said I would for 1 hour at a coffee shop or something, but he wanted more than that and that's when he freaked out.
90% of the foreigners around here see him because as I said before, I live in a pretty small city. I do know of an English speaking nurse at a hospital around 25 minutes away; I guess I'll just have to go there. |
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atwood
Joined: 26 Dec 2009
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| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2012 1:10 am Post subject: |
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| Zulethe wrote: |
| some waygug-in wrote: |
Yes, this happens all the time.
Korea Sparkling.
I had an adult student demand that I go play pool with him. He was normally a very polite quiet type of guy and I thought he would undestand
that I really didn't like pool and didn't want to go.
He got very upset and demanded that I go. I didn't want a confrontation
and I did want to keep him as a student, so I just agreed and went along.
If I hadn't, I imagine things would have become very similar to what you
just experienced. |
Wow, you've been in Korea for how long and you still haven't learned how to answer this question. You never say this. You always say you have other plans. It just amazes me at the lack of cultural competence on this board. |
Exactly. You ALWAYS say you have plans when someone asks you a what are you doing type question. |
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NYC_Gal 2.0
Joined: 10 Dec 2010
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| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2012 6:43 am Post subject: Re: Rejected as a patient for refusing my K Dr's advances.. |
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| Moondoggy wrote: |
do you seriously believe that daves esl forum can offer some suggestions to help you with the situation? or just want to talk about how you feel or know about how others feel? don't you friends to talk to? or just trolling? |
One can ask friends and people on an internet forum. It isn't either/or. |
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Stan Rogers
Joined: 20 Aug 2010
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| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2012 6:45 am Post subject: |
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| Swampfox10mm wrote: |
Let me save you all trouble.
1. Story posted.
2. Gyopo or Korean member calls it a lie
3. Apologists list examples of same thing happening in the USA
4. OP denies it's a fake
5. Argument insues
6. Mod deletes entire thread. |
You left out a step.
Silent majority looks at the childish bickering, does not post and looks at another thread. |
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PatrickGHBusan
Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -
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| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2012 6:49 am Post subject: |
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| Swampfox10mm wrote: |
Let me save you all trouble.
1. Story posted.
2. Gyopo or Korean member calls it a lie (because he has to be Korean or Gyopo to have such an opinion)
3. Apologists list examples of same thing happening in the USA
4. OP denies it's a fake
5. Argument insues
6. Wise old hand from Dave's rolls in and sums up the thread with a neat list or snappy acronym.
7. Mod deletes entire thread. |
Fixed it for ya swampie thing. |
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Moondoggy
Joined: 07 Jun 2011
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| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2012 7:40 am Post subject: |
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| dave's esl cafe is truly amazing these days. "i got punched in the face". "racism happened to me when i was with my k lady". "korea dirty i got food poisoning". and 30 something single women come to this forum and complain(sounds more like 'bragging') about their doctors and students hitting on them. don't they certainly know what to do? when i was a kid i was wondering why people would go on the jerry springer show. probably because they got some money and a chance to degrade themselves on tv. although it provided amusement factor for me i always figured for the most part it wasn't real. |
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Scorpion
Joined: 15 Apr 2012
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| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2012 4:04 pm Post subject: |
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Back home you could report the guy and he'd lose his medical license. This being Korea, the doctor knows that, even if caught on tape, little or nothing will happen to him. Doubly so because the complainant is a non-Korean (who probably led the doctor on).
This is, after all, a country where the MBC program on "the dangers" of relationships with foreigners is run of the mill stuff. |
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