| View previous topic :: View next topic |
| Author |
Message |
cert43
Joined: 17 Jun 2010
|
 Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 4:06 am Post subject: |
 |
|
No, that is another kind of shop and no one is blaming. She is going to continue to feel even more uncomforable, as the days go on and he gets more and more ampt to this. He almost sounds sensitive to to the point of pity ( and that is how he'll get you),so lets hope he leaves you alone.
Urg..so much drama.
Well, let us know what happens, Illy. |
|
| Back to top |
|
 |
some waygug-in
Joined: 25 Jan 2003
|
| Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 5:27 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Illysook wrote: |
A married man drunk dialed me repeatedly.
His apologies were riddled with excuses. and even an invitation to "go out with me" mentioning nothing about his wife or family.
In his final apology, he "explained" that he meant to have me over to his apartment for a home cooked dinner with his wife and children so that we could be friends and so that I would not be homesick. This was another crazy excuse. However, he also asked for my forgiveness and I gave it to him. I hope that he will not bother me anymore.
8 more teaching days! |
Ignore him as much as possible. He's apologized (sort of), so just leave it at that. If he bothers you again, just ignore him. Turn off your phone before you go to bed. I've seen this kind of behavior before and it's just as repulsive now as then. A lot of Asian males feel that they are entitled to extra-marital affairs as an inate right just because they are men.
Not saying some western males are any different, but it seems at least in the West there is a sense of shame about it. (at least sometimes)
Also, ignore some of the other posters on this forum as well. You don't owe anyone here an explanation.
Last edited by some waygug-in on Mon May 09, 2011 6:54 am; edited 1 time in total |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
The Cosmic Hum
Joined: 09 May 2003
Location: Sonic Space
|
| Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 5:27 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Illysook wrote: |
A married man drunk dialed me repeatedly.
His apologies were riddled with excuses. and even an invitation to "go out with me" mentioning nothing about his wife or family.
In his final apology, he "explained" that he meant to have me over to his apartment for a home cooked dinner with his wife and children so that we could be friends and so that I would not be homesick. This was another crazy excuse. However, he also asked for my forgiveness and I gave it to him. I hope that he will not bother me anymore.
8 more teaching days! |
...why does being married having anything to do with the allegations of sexual harassment?
Would it somehow be better if it were a single male that you had an interest in?
Repeatedly drunk dialing...at 2am...meaning twice at 2am...the same day....or at 2am on more than one occasion?
You know he was drunk because you answered the phone and talked to him more than once....at 2am?
Why are you answering a phone call of a married man more than once at 2am?
You are accusing an employee at your school with sexual harassment...a very serious allegation to be making against an employee with roots in the community...an allegation that will remain after you are gone.
They took it seriously...and made that person apologize.
You are upset that too many apologies were given?
They took it too seriously?
So what was the point of the original post?
This thread has so much important factual information missing and yet somehow has drama queen written all over it. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
cert43
Joined: 17 Jun 2010
|
| Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 5:30 am Post subject: |
|
|
Do you want this or not? Maybe he's lying to throw you off..( I mean you've never REALLY seen his wife, right)?
Yeah something is not adding up. Is this man good-looking? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
ZIFA
Joined: 23 Feb 2011
Location: Dici che il fiume..Trova la via al mare
|
| Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 6:52 am Post subject: |
|
|
| cert43 wrote: |
| No, that is another kind of shop and no one is blaming. She is going to continue to feel even more uncomforable, as the days go on and he gets more and more ampt to this. . |
Sorry but your posts are utterly incomprehensible.
Are you sending code messages to your handler? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Illysook
Joined: 30 Jun 2008
|
| Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 6:59 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Too much missing information? For what purpose would I spell out every detail? Are you and the other people here the judge and jury. My original post was on Friday when I was dealing with the worst of this. I gave up a few details this morning after everything seemed to be over. His apology was not very satisfying. In fact, it was full of excuses and lies. He is not a nice person and whether or not I am a drama queen really doesn't change this. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
cert43
Joined: 17 Jun 2010
|
| Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 7:18 am Post subject: |
|
|
ok..whose my "handler"..No Illysook- We are here to help you with this as much as possible. Trust me;as much as you think we don't; we complety DO. 
Just trying to help and want the full truth ( otherwise we wouldn't be here on this forum so much)trying to watch out for your well-being.
After-all, we don't know you or your intent with these accusations.
All I can tell you is not to lie..with ANYTHING. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
hubbahubba
Joined: 31 May 2008
|
| Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 11:33 am Post subject: |
|
|
| this thread was fun...thanks for the entertainment...good stuff |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
winterfall
Joined: 21 May 2009
|
| Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 10:41 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Unfortunately not much you can do about legal restraining orders. There's no enough info to tell whether the harasser is a co-worker, student, or your boss.
Change your number or go into your contact directory and switch his number to silent. You can also try talking to your dept head or a male co-worker (Older is better). Protecting female employees is their unofficial duty. Unless they're the ones harassing you.
On second thought, you can go through the legal system. Unsafe work environment is the employer's responsibility but, you'll need to call the labor board about that and not until you've exhausted & documented everything with your employer |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Carbon
Joined: 28 Jan 2011
|
| Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 10:56 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| cert43 wrote: |
ok..whose my "handler"..No Illysook- We are here to help you with this as much as possible. Trust me;as much as you think we don't; we complety DO.
Just trying to help and want the full truth ( otherwise we wouldn't be here on this forum so much)trying to watch out for your well-being.
After-all, we don't know you or your intent with these accusations.
All I can tell you is not to lie..with ANYTHING. |
Come unglued much?  3 total train wreck posts in a row and judging by the time between, I'd say this guy is chronic! |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Boodleheimer
Joined: 10 Mar 2006
Location: working undercover for the Man
|
| Posted: Tue May 10, 2011 2:52 am Post subject: |
|
|
avoid him.
HUGS! |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Juregen
Joined: 30 May 2006
|
| Posted: Tue May 10, 2011 8:50 pm Post subject: Re: Sexual Harrassment...won't they take it seriously? |
|
|
| Illysook wrote: |
This is not just a matter of my perspective. I've never led this guy on in any way. He only has my phone number for professional reasons. I don't think that I even gave it to him. He must have acquired it from the school. His behavior could not be more inappropriate and I have the texted apologies to prove it. It has come to the point where his profuse apologies are not enough. He needs to leave me alone. My contract will be over in 2 weeks. You would think he could do this.
That's all that I want. No more apologies, just leave me alone. I've told my co-teacher, she told him that I was angry, he called AGAIN to apologize. I told him that I didn't want to talk about it. I don't want to talk about it...especially not after I've left school for the day! I'm so upset over this. I did nothing to deserve it. They should not have told him to call me and apologize, they should have taken some measure to be sure that he would leave me alone... and now I am so uncomfortable about even going to work on Monday! What can I do? |
Print out the log from your phone, go to the police, file criminal charges against the individual, let them do the rest. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
ThingsComeAround
Joined: 07 Nov 2008
|
| Posted: Wed May 11, 2011 6:41 pm Post subject: |
|
|
you could try calling him at 2am and telling him you are in Busan but you want to meet him right away...  |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Daniel_D
Joined: 29 Dec 2008
|
| Posted: Wed May 11, 2011 8:39 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| You shouldn't live your life in fear. Send a note to his wife. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
The Cosmic Hum
Joined: 09 May 2003
Location: Sonic Space
|
| Posted: Fri May 13, 2011 9:32 am Post subject: |
|
|
| ...best of luck with this situation. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
FAQ
Search
Memberlist
Usergroups
Register
Profile
Log in to check your private messages
Log in
