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Korean Job Discussion Forums
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Died By Bear
Joined: 13 Jul 2010
Location: On the big lake they call Gitche Gumee
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 Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 1:33 am Post subject: |
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An aquaintence that taught at one of the really good prep schools in Kagnam/Daechi Dong got married back in 2000 and took her to a small town in Alabama.
The immigration officer at the nearest location was housed in a trailer (his office) and used to call them regularly to update them on what they needed to do to get going. They knew eachother by first name. Good God, if you only knew what immi was like in big cities or in the SW part of the country. You'd be lucky to get the right information from an overworked and uncaring office. It was horrible for us and took every day they said it would, sometimes a bit more. After 3 years I think it was we got her perm res, but it was a hassle.
Another guy I knew had enough money to hire an immi attorney. Never had to lift a finger or visit the immi office except once I believe. The attorney took care of everything. And they snuck her in via Canada as well. Divorced now. Sad, sad story. |
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dereklee003
Joined: 03 Jan 2009
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| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 4:36 am Post subject: |
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| hack wrote: |
| Modernist wrote: |
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| If you feel the need to get married, find someone who is already a qualified resident or citizen. You're probably still going to split up but you won't get as badly screwed over as you will if you are the reason they immigrated. |
Ah, a romantic! |
LOL No just a realist |
Given that the divorce rate was around 50% last time I checked, that makes you a "glass is half empty" kind of guy? I'm more of the half full type myself. |
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beison
Joined: 28 Feb 2010
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| Posted: Sun Apr 08, 2012 7:23 pm Post subject: |
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All you pessimists are dingeses!
I taught in Korea, found a korean gf that's pretty awesome, and moved back to Chicago with her. I've got a decent job that supports us, she's in America on a 5 year student visa and is going to an English school learning English (her English was quite terrible when we met and we spoke in mostly Korean.) and our life is great. Future plans are either we continue to live together and are happy, or we break up and are happy.
Life is never really permanate, but if you let worries hold you back you won't get anywhere worthwhile. My situation has worked extremely well for over a year, and I expect it to continue to work well. Our life together is great, and if our lives take us in different directions in the future, my GF will have gotten the experience of living in a foreign country and now has lots of foreign friends. If you want to go, and you think it will be fun and enriching living together back in your home country, don't let a bunch of pessimists drag you down with "worries that it won't work."
Just go with a plan, do the proper legwork to make sure you've got that job lined up that you mentioned, and jump in with both feet. Good luck! |
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hack
Joined: 24 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 3:43 pm Post subject: |
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| beison wrote: |
All you pessimists are dingeses!
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I may be a dinges (whatever that is) but at least I'm a realist.
| beison wrote: |
| Future plans are either we continue to live together and are happy, or we break up and are happy. |
Talk about idealistic-that's not how things work in the real world. Tell us in 5 years what happened with your Korean gf experience. Bet you hate her and are still trying to find a way to pay her off. |
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beison
Joined: 28 Feb 2010
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| Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 3:51 pm Post subject: |
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| hack wrote: |
| beison wrote: |
All you pessimists are dingeses!
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I may be a dinges (whatever that is) but at least I'm a realist.
| beison wrote: |
| Future plans are either we continue to live together and are happy, or we break up and are happy. |
Talk about idealistic-that's not how things work in the real world. Tell us in 5 years what happened with your Korean gf experience. Bet you hate her and are still trying to find a way to pay her off. |
Who knows what will happen in 5 years. I know the girl I was dating 5 years ago isn't someone I hate now. If the girl I'm dating now isn't the girl I'm dating 5 years from now, so be it. Bottom line though, is that we're both busy enjoying life together at the moment.
Even if things fall appart with my GF, or the OP's GF when he brings her back to america, so what? What's the harm in trying? After all, if things really get that bad and she decides to go back to Korea, I'm only out a thousand USD to help her with a plane ticket.
I know it's going to sound cheesy, but whatever: If you don't decide to give something crazy a try, you've got no chance of it working out and you getting lucky! There's really not much you can lose. |
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Gorf
Joined: 25 Jun 2011
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| Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 8:28 pm Post subject: |
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| hack wrote: |
| Talk about idealistic-that's not how things work in the real world. Tell us in 5 years what happened with your Korean gf experience. Bet you hate her and are still trying to find a way to pay her off. |
Jeez man, what's the deal? Did you get burned in the past by some love and run bird who racked up your credit card bills and had a keep-a-daddy baby? It sure sounds like you're bitter about some past memory and it's manifesting itself in your responses. Or possibly you're just mad you're eating black noodles on Saturday?
Either way, this thread was made so that I could get advice on the best way to bring a girl to America, and whether or not you think it's a good idea (considering you know next-to-nothing about me, her or our situation) was never a part of the question. And no "don't do it" isn't a valid response.
Basically, get out.  |
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allovertheplace
Joined: 02 Aug 2009
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| Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2012 6:54 pm Post subject: |
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| Adam Carolla wrote: |
| allovertheplace wrote: |
They are indeed very expensive locations. Doesn't take away from my point though.
If you want cheap life why leave korea in this first place? i just think that guys bringing korean gfs of wives back should think much more about their partners happiness over their own desire to live near friends and family.
Also DC and NYC (two of the most expensive cities in NA), are the locations with the most employment opportunities - for you and your spouse. |
First, it's clear you have some kind of issue with foreign men and Korean women, else why would you assume that the foreign man is being selfish and simply wants to "live near friends and family"? Why assume that the foreign man isn't thinking about his partner's happiness? Why assume the Korean woman has no say about where the family relocates to? How do you know they don't come to a decision together?
I've already outlined reasons why moving to a big city might not be ideal. Of course, if you need further proof, there's this:
http://articles.nydailynews.com/2009-02-05/news/17916262_1_new-yorkers-urban-future-expensive-urban-area
The short version is that you need to earn 100k per year to be middle class in New York. Sure, maybe there are more jobs in NYC than in other places, however, I posit that if you were coming from a career in ESL that you would not qualify for a job paying in excess of $100k per year, which makes your jobs point pretty meaningless.
Second, you ask: "If you want cheap life why leave korea in this first place?"
A) Nobody mentioned anything about wanting a "cheap life", and B) there are plenty of reasons for moving out of Korea and I'm quite frankly shocked that you can't come up with any on your own.
Honestly, it sounds like you have issues with foreign men and Korean women. I can't really think of any other reason why you've pigeon-holed the foreign man as being "selfish" and needing to live in his home town to be close to friends and family, while also assuming that the Korean spouse has no say in the matter. |
I don't have an issue with foreign wives. But I have seen too many instances of western guys taking home korean gfs and wives based on very little more than sexual appeal. This is not standard but it exists...if you claim it doesnt you clearly are one of those I speak of.
And I currently live in a big expensive east coast city. Trust me, I know more about western employment options and living expenses than you do.
And I don't take the NY daily news as proof or anything more than how the mets did last night. |
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