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Chuck Norris
If I am elected president

I was wondering the other day, if I ran for president, what would be my campaign promises?

I made a list I'm certain can get me elected.

If I'm elected president, I will...

Require members of Congress to work out on the Total Gym 15 minutes each day � or else they can't vote on anything.

Cut spending by dismissing the Secret Service, at least for my eight years in office (why would I need them?).

Resurrect Bruce Lee and appoint him head of homeland security (OK, the CIA and FBI too).

Give a presidential pardon to no one, ever. Baretta was right in the '70s, "Don't do the crime, if you can't do the time. Don't do it!"

Turn the Rose Garden into a new fighting ring for the World Combat League, in which liberals and conservatives will fight for legislative leadership and priority. (For fun, Saturday night fights will feature a recurring bout between Hannity and Colmes). "American Idol" already told me they will provide the entertainment.

Require Bill Gates and Warren Buffet to personally pay for national, comprehensive medical coverage for every American (or meet me in the Rose Garden).

Increase jobs in America by sending ninja teams to sabotage and steal them back from other countries.

Tattoo an American flag with the words, "In God we trust," on the forehead of every atheist.

Give a tax credit to anyone naming their children Walker or Texas Ranger (excluding Will Farrell).

Resolve the Iraq war by bringing all of our military personnel home immediately, then going over there by myself for "martial arts negotiations."

Hang Saddam Hussein (Whoops � scratch that � already did it undercover).

Convey my plan for world peace to the United Nations: taking the governor of California with me on our "kick butt and ask questions later" USO world tour.

Give every new military enlistee abroad a copy of my upcoming new book, "The Threat of Justice," with the words, "Arnold and I will be back to pump you up!" above my autograph.

Bring on Donald Trump as my apprentice. When my presidential term is complete and he has obtained his black belt, or whichever comes first, he can buy the White House and of course rename it (to, what else, "The Trump House").

Create new immigration legislation: to deport all liberals (then force them to listen to Bill O' Reilly every day for five years, at which point they may return).

Ask producer Mark Barnett to film "Survivor � Camp David," where world leaders will meet annually, for an all-out cage-fighting championship. The winner will take home $1,000,000 in Disney Dollars, good in Europe or America.

Send an autographed photo of me and my horse (no dogs in my White House) to everyone who commits to read my new WorldNetDaily "presidential column" and blast a blog who dares to disagree with me.

Complete the plan to bring Tony Blair to the U.S. as my vice president.

Expose the real WMDs � my fists and feet.

Replace Letterman, Leno or Conan once monthly, since stand-up comedy is what most governmental officials do anyway.

Ask Al Gore to provide me with a special governmental study on the connection between spotted owl extinction and global warming. (I'm pretty sure Michael Moore will film the docudrama).

Help Rosie transition from "The View" to the pew � it might help her get over that anger problem. If the pew doesn't work, she can spar Trump in the Rose Garden.

First and foremost, however, my greatest priorities will be to...

Personally smoke out bin Laden by myself and round-house kick him all the way back to America, where my United Fighting Arts Federation will handle the justice issues.

Make all Chuck Norris facts come true (well, not quite all of them � I'm a happily, married man!)

Looking over my campaign promises, I'm sure my liberal friends are even now rejoicing that I'm not really running for president.

[Len8]

Chuck Norris was in Korea with the army or something. He actually joined in with some Koreans on some backwoods street who were practicing tae kwon do or some form of matial art, and got flattened. didn't cry over it of course, but went back to them and practiced with them. I think this episode in his life was a readers Digest Article of a few years back

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Still America's No. 1 threat

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Chuck Norris

As we stand on the edge of a new year, Americans continue to debate the necessity of war, especially in light of the almost 4,000 service men and women who have sacrificed their lives and the $15 billion a month taxpayers give to wage it.

The war on terror began on the day extremists thugs murdered 3,000 innocent civilians on 9/11, and continues with a 2008 Department of Defense proposed budget of $189 billion to carry out global counterterrorism.

Of all the terrorists perching at our borders, however, those who penetrate the barriers of our body are still our greatest threat and cause the highest numbers of casualties � roughly 2 million per year. I'm not referring to biological warfare, but consumption combat.

The casualties of digestive warfare?

Last year at this time I wrote the article, "The biggest threat to America," which highlighted the dangers of obesity and trans fats. Since then, more than 750,000 Americans died from cardiovascular diseases, 550,000 from cancer and 450,000 from smoking.

Studies still show that obesity contributes to the number one cause of death in our nation: cardiovascular disease. It includes "heart disease, stroke, high blood pressure, heart failure and several other conditions [and] has been the leading cause of death in the United States every year since 1900."

Obesity might even be the cause of greater numbers of maternal deaths and automobile accident fatalities.

That's the bad news.

From the battlefields to the kitchens.

The good news is that, if obesity exacerbates these diagnoses and mortality statistics, then it also remains the most preventable cause of American deaths. We can reduce the rates of the 1 in 5 children and 2 out of 3 adults who are overweight in our nation.

If we are as vigilant about attacking our bodily adversaries as we are global terrorists, we can save tens if not hundreds of thousands of Americans' lives in 2008. If we are as tenacious about nutritional education and application as we are about reading and blogging the latest pundit polarities about the presidential candidates, we can reverse the trends of consumption casualties.

The question is: In 2008, will we be as diligent to save American lives in our kitchens as we are those on the battlefields?

And with 46 million adults smoking daily and increasing the odds of heart disease by 2-3 times, we need more of our citizens to take the Great American Smokeout Challenge. With 4,000 more children ages 12-17 beginning to smoke everyday, we need to oppose cigarette marketing through such ploys as flavored tobacco.

3 more ways to improve your health (and keep Uncle Sam out of your health care)

(1) Educate yourself and your loved ones on habits of healthiness � then apply what you learn. The American Heart Association has some fantastic suggestions for reducing health risks and obtaining a more vigorous lifestyle, even for children.
(2) Regularly consume spiritual food. Your body is more than a shell. It houses an eternal spirit, and how you nourish it affects mind, body and soul.

Thousands of health professionals concur, including The National Cancer Institute, The Mayo Clinic and The National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine.

More than 2,000 years ago, the scriptures proclaimed, "[Faith] will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones."

That is why my personal health care plan always recommends regular Bible reading, church attendance and the consuming of the "Daily Bread" devotional.

(3) Vote for Mike Huckabee as the Republican presidential nomination. Mike opposes any governmental intervention and bureaucracy that mandates national health care. We don't need to pay billions of dollars through new taxes to provide universal coverage. Huckabee espouses that we discover more ways to motivate personal responsibility and disease prevention, encourage the states' role as stages for new market-based ideas, and challenge private sectors to seek creative ways to bring down medical costs.

Mike is so passionate about health care that he personally lost 120 lbs. a few years ago and, even now, runs marathons. He leads the way among presidential candidates in living out his national health care plan.

As governor of Arkansas for more than a decade, one of Mike's proudest achievements was signing into legislation ARKids First � the creation of health insurance coverage for more than 70,000 Arkansas children who might have otherwise gone without.

Mike is uniquely qualified to follow through with his presidential promise, "I will work with the private sector, Congress, health care providers, and other concerned parties to lead a complete overhaul of our health care system."

That's where Mike Huckabee stands on healthcare � and I support him for it. One more reason why he's my choice for president, and I believe we should all join his team, spread word about him and support him financially.

Here's to a healthier, happier, Huckabee America in 2008!

[Hanson]

Everything in that post was very informative, but this is where you lost me:

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Why Chuck Endorsed Mike

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORy50ikYw74

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Chuck and Mike Discuss Immigration

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYHfLlJXFsg

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Chuck and Mike Discuss Faith

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTjqEnPFVg8

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Chuck Norris Approved

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjYv2YW6azE&feature=user

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Will Chuck Norris Blend?

http://www.willitblend.com/videos.aspx?type=unsafe&video=chuck

[karma police]

<-- my man-crush on the Norris...

mythical beasts, cannot defeat my body guard
He fights for me in my avatar and wins
the Conan, an admirable opponent
and late night talk show host
the Norris, i hate Conan's goddam face
so kick his gay ass perpetually in my avatar

half man, half amazing
the Norris, He's so my man-crush
i love the man in my dreams
where a myriad of succuba invade my late night desires
He fights them off in my avatar even while i dream
the Norris, He's half man, half amazing...i'd say

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Chuck Norris
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Most overlooked issue in presidential debates

Despite that candidates like Mitt Romney have outspent Mike Huckabee 20 to 1 on the campaign trail, Mike has a 2 to 1 lead over Romney in Iowa and is placing No. 1 in some national polls.

Newt Gingrich said this past week that Mike Huckabee could "absolutely" win the Republican presidential nomination. "People tend to underestimate him. This is a man who got more than 40 percent of the African-American vote in Arkansas, getting re-elected as governor. He has a very attractive personality."

Is this an important issue to anyone but Mike?

While Huckabee and I were being interviewed on Newt's radio broadcast, Mike mentioned two facts about education that shocked me.

The first is in 905 total minutes of formal Republican debate time thus far, only two questions amounting to roughly four minutes of air time have been given to address the topic of education and America's kids. And the majority of that time appears to have originated at the Values Voter debate, where most of the front-tiered candidates didn't even show!

The second is that every day 6,000 students leave the approximately 94,000 public schools in America. By the time you read this column about 12 more will follow.

Both of those facts reveal alarming disproportions. The first should be far more and the second far less. If the first is properly proportionate, the second must not be a problem to those creating questions for the debates. But if the second truly demonstrates an attritional and educational crisis, time for the first should be far better allocated.
Mike's plan to fix our public schools, halt that exodus, and provide citizens with support for alternate sources of education is exactly what our country needs. But to date, he has not been asked one question in any formal debate about it.

Stop the governmental bureaucracy over education

Mike believes the government needs less of a role in running our children's education and more of a role in supporting parents' educational decisions for their children. Children belong to their parents, not the government. And the parents ought to have the right and government support to personalize their child's education as they so wish. And where the Department of Education, unions or any other organizations impede their decisions, they must be stopped.

Mike would shift the emphasis of the centralized federal gridlock on education and place it more directly upon the people of each state. If education reform is going to happen, it is going to happen at that level. As our Constitution grants, "we the people" must have more power to modify, create and expand our educational options. The No Child Left Behind act is a step in the right direction, but we need to go even further.

Personalize education and curriculum

Mike's plan is to raise the standard of education � and he's not merely talking math and science scores. No doubt we must do better and score higher nationally and internationally in those courses, and Mike has the experience to help us. Test scores rose dramatically when he was governor of Arkansas because of his education reforms.

But, if we expect to stop the attrition in our public schools and build a better tomorrow, we must do more than increase students' knowledge and skills of arithmetic and the experimental world.

We have created a left-brain lopsided educational system. We tell kids to sit down, be quiet, and merely attempt to download information into their brains. We've fostered programming not ingenuity. So why is it a surprise that our students are bored out of their minds, unchallenged, and our classrooms have turned into babysitting centers of undisciplined minds and unruly behavior?

Mike believes America's survival and prosperity will be obtained and maintained by creativity and innovation, so that the educational world should create an academic environment that produces those. He believes we should personalize and design a core curriculum around each student, rather than forcing every student into a universally intellectual mold. He espouses that we send into our schools "weapons of mass instruction" to increase the right-side of education again with music and the arts.

We need a complete overhaul of curriculum and the methodology of how we educate. We need education that produces the caliber of people that we want to run our country in the future, with more leadership training, community participation programs and more practical classes on managing homes, businesses, investments, civility, marriage and parenting.

And we must not fear conservative curriculum courses like world religion, ethics, Intelligent Design, and the most overlooked yet embedded text in Western culture and civilization � the Bible � which even our Founders expected us to teach.

Provide further support for educational options

If states continue to oppose conservative curricula and impose overarching liberal educational revisions and law like California recently enacted in SB777, which will in the end reverse discriminate against religious students and students with traditional family values, public schools should continue to expect an increased exodus. (A petition drive has until Dec. 20 to repeal SB777.)

And what if public schools don't change? The minds and hearts of our children are on the line. And if the curricula don't match the values in our homes, then we must seek other alternatives. If it doesn't fit, we must omit! We must remove our children from the public schools and seek private ones, chartered ones or homeschooling co-ops.

As far back as the late '80s, and then as governor, Huckabee has always been a big backer of educational alternatives to public schools. He's always been passionate about children's education, period! That enthusiasm even carried to his daughter Sarah, who attempted to correct academic wrongs when she worked for two years in the Department of Education.

Education that 'shall forever be encouraged'

Lastly, Mike believes America ought to make the profession of teaching much more attractive and esteemed. We need to create a new level of appreciation for teachers. If we believe our children are our future, then we must re-establish that teaching is one of the most vital professions to America's welfare and future.

The fact is we currently don't believe that. That is why we've only heard two questions and spent no more than four minutes in 15 hours of national debate on the issue of education.

When will our liberal media get a clue? The public wants to hear about real issues and how the candidates can improve the future of America, not just about the size of the holes that pundits can puncture or blast in candidates' records.

Education is the next big issue our country and its presidential candidates need to address. Our Founding Fathers still cry out for us to remember its essential constituency in our republic. As in 1789 when President Washington signed into law the Northwest Ordinance, stating, "Religion, morality, and knowledge, being necessary to good government and the happiness of mankind, schools and the means of education shall forever be encouraged."

That's where Mike Huckabee stands on education � and I support him for it. One more reason why he's my choice for president, and I believe we should all join his team, spread word about him and support him financially.

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Chuck Norris Action Jeans

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[karma police]

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Chuck Norris

Our Founders' recommendations for president

Who would our Founders endorse for president today? What would they look for in elected officials?
On May 26, 1790, I believe we were given some answers to those questions, before an auspicious audience such as Massachusetts Governor, former President of the Constitutional Congress and signer of the Declaration of Independence, John Hancock, and Lieutenant Governor and another signer of the Declaration of Independence, Samuel Adams, as well as the then entire legislature of both governmental Massachusetts' Houses.

Rev. Daniel Fosters' inspirational address to these magistrates is a must read for anyone concerned with the future of our country and criteria for properly appointed representatives. Pay particular attention to the end of his message where he speaks to each of those listed above.

A primer for the presidency

Foster was a New Braintree pastor, who was invited to deliver a sermon before the newly-elected officials � a governmental tradition in the founding years of our Republic.

The words he shared that day were not only stirring but reflective of a general consensus and credo of what citizens (not just clergy) expected of their legislative leaders. Its components still contain what I would call a primer for the election of the presidency or any other chosen representative.

Such an elementary leadership text would include, but not be exclusive to, the following:

''Select and prefer Christians''

For Foster and our Founders, government is a ''divine appointment,'' an ordained institution of God, and ''an important mean of delivering us from the evils of the apostasy; and designed to prepare us for the more encouraging restraints the gospel enjoins.'' As such, it too has Jesus Christ, not some nebulous and neutered god, as its head.

He being commissioned by the Father to manage the great affairs of Empire, as well as of Zion. "Yet have I set my King upon my holy Hill of Zion." � "The government shall be upon his shoulders."
Subsequently, governmental leaders are to be regarded as ministers or servants of God, unless they refrain from obeying and executing his laws.

And as magistrates are honored by Christ, and act under his banner, they should be careful to be his glory, and support his religion in the world. ... If they rule for God, and for good to the people, they are to be subjected to, otherwise, "we ought to obey God, rather than men.''
Foster warned, ''If religion is not honored and supported by men in places of public trust, the glory of the Lord will soon depart, and the fire of God be scattered over the city.''

Though the Framers opposed the reign of kings or priests, they advocated and intermingled their Christian faith and politics. As John Jay, the first Chief Justice of the United States, wrote to Jedidiah Morse on Feb. 28, 1797, "Providence has given to our people the choice of their rulers. And it is the duty as well as the privilege and interest, of a Christian nation to select and prefer Christians for their rulers."

Lead by ''wisdom''

The key text of Foster's sermon was Proverbs 8:16 in the Bible, "By Me princes rule, and nobles, all who judge rightly.'' ''In the text, the person speaking is doubtless Jesus Christ,'' Foster unabashedly declared, pointing out that he is Wisdom personified and the God upon whom governmental leaders should lean.

The text leads us to speak of civil government, as ordained of God, in the hands of the mediator; of civil rulers, as holding their commission and authority under Christ; of their duty and dignity as his Ministers, and of the duty and privilege of the people under their administration.
Unlike today, no politician then would have ever even thought of Foster's words as religiously pejorative or prejudice, for Christianity was the only religion upon which our Republic was founded. It was clergy, not imams, who were called to speak before legislatures. Even Jefferson did not propose a separation between mosque and state, just as he could never have imagined a democracy in which its congressmen were sworn into government upon a Quran.

Upholding three primary duties

According to Foster, in order to rule rightly, governmental leaders are to maintain three chief obligations:

It is their duty to uphold the kingdom of Christ, which consists in "righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost."

It is the duty of Christian rulers, to preserve and secure to the people, their liberties and properties. (Which I'm certain included their national borders!)

The Christian ruler will hear the complaints, and redress the grievances of the people he governs.
Can you imagine if our present governmental leaders were obliged to these codes of conduct? Civility just might be obtained by civil government!

Foster concluded:

The attention Christian rulers pay to religion in their hearts, and in their government, will be their support when they are called to lay down their commission, and their lives; it will brighten the scene before them, and embalm their memories when they are dead. ... Religion is, and ever has been, considered the glory of a people; as it insures the favor and protection of Heaven.''
Who should be our next president?

Foster's message was welcomed with a rousing reception among this esteemed Massachusetts' collection of America's Founders, 14 years after the Declaration of Independence and the same year that Rhode Island completed the 13-state, three-year ratification of the United States Constitution.

The spirit of those proceedings, as well as the remaining Founding Fathers, still beckon us to raise our criteria for electing governmental leaders beyond charisma, articulation, education, and background experience. They call us to appoint godly men and women.

In an age where the left are going right and the right going left, we need someone at the helm of our country who holds to old-fashioned values but can still lead into a bold new age. I'll be measuring the candidates by ''Our Founders' recommendations for president.''

In the words of Rev. Foster, ''This is the way to have the presence, and blessing of God with them, and upon their administration.''

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Are We Reaping What We've Sown?
By Chuck Norris
Tuesday, February 19, 2008

On February 14, 1929, five members of the North Side Irish/German gang led by George "Bugs" Moran were shot and killed in Chicago, Illinois, by four members of Al "Scarface" Capone's South Side Italian gang. On February 14, 2008, five students at Northern Illinois University were senselessly killed in DeKalb, Illinois, when a former graduate and gunman dressed in a black trench coat walked into a lecture hall and opened fire with a shotgun and two handguns. In all, I've counted at least 14 different shootings at colleges or universities since 2000, resulting in approximately 60 fatalities and dozens more wounded.

And the question we're all once again asking is, "Why?" Why the escalation of murderous rampages upon our collegiate settings? What will stop the brutal butchering of our youth on campuses across the nation? What will give solace and security to students and parents sending their children away to schools, when they are potential shooting playgrounds? Will we continue to fight to reverse these appalling trends or simply surrender this social crisis to Congress? Will we allow another human hunting to headline tomorrow's news?

While we absolutely need to implement further campus securities to reduce the number of violent incidents (like the 10 mentioned at SecurityInfoWatch.com), we must equally address the deeper needs of individuals and society in order to eliminate these acts of evil from ever breaching the borders of another campus. We need to understand what creates, contributes to or exacerbates these heinous crimes and eliminate those negative infusions.

A decade ago, GOP presidential candidate Mike Huckabee wrote the book "Kids Who Kill," which examines and seeks remedies for school shootings. In it he points to modern day factors that contribute to a culture of killing. Among them are a devaluing and disregard for human life; a greater parental disconnection from and immoral license with their children; a fascination with antiheroes or gangsters that breeds cynicism and selfishness; a false sense of self-worth or a perceived incapability of obtaining status, notoriety or contentment; a thirst for adrenaline and extremes to acquire attention, as well as pushing the envelope of rebellion, chaos and brutality; the impersonalizing of society through such devices as the Internet and frequent transient shifts in employment, living localities and friendships; the legislation of subversive morality; an abandonment of a fellowship and moral center of community like a church; and a complete disregard for moral absolutes.

We teach our children they are nothing more than glorified apes, yet we don't expect them to act like monkeys. We place our value in things, yet expect our children to value people. We disrespect one another, but expect our children to respect others. We terminate children in the womb, but are surprised when children outside the womb terminate other children. We push God to the side, but expect our children to be godly. We've abandoned moral absolutes, yet expect our children to obey the universal commandment: "Thou shall not murder." As James Madison once wrote, "Liberty may be endangered by the abuses of liberty, as well as by the abuses of power."

When asked what a president can do, Mike Huckabee posited amidst his condolences for the victims of the NIU shootings, "I think a president ought to just encourage this country to once again get back to their own moral center."

Once upon a time, churches served as moral centers of a community. Of course, not any longer. And as Theodore Roosevelt once said, "In this actual world, a churchless community, a community where men have abandoned and scoffed at, or ignored their Christian duties, is a community on the rapid downgrade." Our founders concurred.

George Washington said in his Farewell Address:

Of all the dispositions and habits which lead to political prosperity, religion and morality are indispensable supports. In vain would that man claim the tribute of patriotism, who should labor to subvert these great pillars of human happiness, these firmest props of the duties of men and citizens. The mere politician, equally with the pious man, ought to respect and to cherish them. A volume could not trace all their connections with private and public felicity. Let it simply be asked: Where is the security for property, for reputation, for life, if the sense of religious obligation deserts the oaths which are the instruments of investigation in courts of justice? And let us with caution indulge the supposition that morality can be maintained without religion. Whatever may be conceded to the influence of refined education on minds of peculiar structure, reason and experience both forbid us to expect that national morality can prevail in exclusion of religious principle.

Do we now believe we can consider morality and religion optional, without suffering civil and societal repercussions, despite the warning of our Founding Fathers, such as John Adams, "Our Constitution was made for only a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other"?

If Psalm 33:12 says, "Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord," then what will be the state of blessedness for the nation that abandons God and his moral code of conduct?