Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Rock]

What do you think about your focus here in Asia and the fact many of your family and relatives back home may have no clue as to your interests here and a completely biased opinion about Asians in general?

Do you sever all contacts? Tell them you're no longer keeping in touch?

I say this so as to avoid double discouragement: the fact you may feel unwanted here and that family also thinks you don't belong, are foolish for making such a venture.

[chris_J2]

Hang in there. Although your students & co-teachers may not appear to appreciate you, deep down, they really do. Why not treat one of your closer family members to a return flight to Korea in Spring or next Fall? They could judge for themselves.

[Bibbitybop]

[Rteacher]

Phone cards are so cheap that there's no excuse not to keep in touch with family members back home to regularly update them on what you're doing and what it's like living and working in Korea.

[caniff]

[anyway]

I hear you OP. It's tough. I've lived abroad for almost 9 years in a few different countries and my family has never really expressed much interest. It is especially difficult to connect with my father when I visit now. We end up talking only about him, his city, etc. It is really kind of sad, but we were never close. My mom makes a better effort to ask questions although she usually doesn't remember the answers. haha

To be honest, it doesn't bother me what people say or think of me, even my family. We all make decisions which can be questioned. The problem with the folks back home is they never question because almost everyone thinks and acts in exactly the same ways! The most important thing is to think your decisions through (and through!) and stand by them. Of course, if one turns out to be a mistake, admit it and learn the lesson.

The problem of finding acceptance or at least a niche in a foreign country is very very difficult. It requires the utmost self-confidence, positive attitude, and luck - a thick skin doesn't hurt either. Remember, it is usually a job or a spouse that gives ex-pats the root they need to stay put for the long haul.

My advice is lower your expectations of others - don't give up on them. I guess I would ask you to contemplate once again why you have gone abroad, etc. Reflect and count your blessings.

[blaseblasphemener]

I have a blog where I post pictures periodically. I sent out a mass email to friends and family to let them know about it. If they want to check in on what I'm doing, or want to see pics of where I live, they're welcome to it. If not, that's fine. I'm not really interested that interested in life back home, to be honest. But it's a mistake to severe contact with people, especially family. They are the ones you can count on in the really tough times, even the sh@t ones can sometimes surprise you.

[pest2]

Yeah, actually, my parents do alot more to try to stay in contact with me than I do with them. If its been a month or something and I've been too lazy to communicate they'll send an email asking what's up. My mother sends these annoying long emails in which she rambles on about her trips to the grocery and/or some meeting she had at work or some other unexciting thing. But its good they try and I sometime feel guilty for being so lazy.

As someone else suggested, I keep photos on blog on a website mostly for them to see.

[PeteJB]

You have to work at it. I was able to bring my folks entirely around from their narrow attitudes.

[nobbyken]

Probably closer to my family now than I ever was back home.
MSN chats with webcam and mic have been excellent, even though sometimes it is very tiring because of the time difference.

They also have a new grand-daugter to look at. Sometimes just leave the cam on her cot for them to look at.
Posting movie clips and pictures on esnips, nearly daily, also helps.

EDIT: Some movie clips showing the street and traffic/parking round our home also give a better picture of where we live.

[Captain Corea]

[safeblad]

i keep in touch with my immediate family but beyond that nothing

they're not interested in me nor i in them fvck'em

[boatofcar]

[endo]

[Atavistic]