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trubadour
Joined: 03 Nov 2006
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 10:06 pm Post subject: Rate My Cover Letter |
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I hate writing these things! Advice or comments appreciated.
It's harder still to write these things when you don't know who is going to read them. Do you think it can be easily understood by someone who doesn't speak English as their first language?
Is it too long? too wordy? too obviously bollocks?! Not bollocksy enough? Wrong sort of bollocks?
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Dear …. ,
I am writing in response to your advertisement for a Full-time English Teacher, which appeared on the [website name] website on [date]. As you can see from my attached resume my experience and qualifications match this position's requirements.
My experience of the last two years teaching in Asia has been a great opportunity for me to prove myself as a teacher. I judge my success on the happiness and progress of my students. Researching, trying and testing teaching strategies in the classroom is key to successful teaching.
It is important for me to do everything I can do help the students improve their English in a comfortable and stimulating environment. I genuinely enjoy working with English language learners of all ages. My students usually appreciate my efforts and together we create a fun, productive atmosphere to work in.
Of course, personal qualities are also very important for a teacher of EFL/ESL. In the classroom, I am astute and humorous, professional and responsible. Outside of the classroom, I enjoy making friends, experiencing different cultures, trying new food and learning languages.
In addition to my normal teaching responsibilities, I have been completing an on-line TEFL and learning the national languages of Korea and China.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to the opportunity to personally discuss why I am particularly suited to this position. I can be contacted by email at ...
Yours sincerely,
Trubadour
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shetan

Joined: 24 Apr 2006 Location: In front of my PC.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 10:58 pm Post subject: |
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Its not bad...
I think none of it really matters without a nice photo. haha  |
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Khenan

Joined: 25 Dec 2007
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 11:59 pm Post subject: |
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I would use fewer paragraphs (i.e., fewer concepts), and expand on the ones you keep. Instead of hammering home on "I am," be explicit about what "I have" done. Make it up if you have to, but with two years of teaching, I'm sure you can come up with something.  |
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spliff

Joined: 19 Jan 2004 Location: Khon Kaen, Thailand
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 1:36 am Post subject: |
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So so...pretty much a sponge job. |
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trubadour
Joined: 03 Nov 2006
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 1:50 am Post subject: |
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Since you mention it..
It's the only one I've got with me looking teacher-y. What'd ya think?
Khenan - I'm working on the 'I have.' I like the idea that it should read more like a record of acheivement, than a declaration of suitability.
Spliff - yeah botch job is right. I got the intro and stuff off about.com. I hate writing these things. You can't be honest, you can't work out what it is you're good at, you can't figure out how to make it readable, etc, etc. |
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zappadelta

Joined: 31 Aug 2004
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:10 am Post subject: |
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Trubadour, it looks pretty good. I woould recommend less paragraph breaks, maybe 2-3 paragraphs at most. Also, I would consider changing the word 'stimulating' to 'energetic' or something like this. I think everything else looks good. |
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Hyeon Een

Joined: 24 Jun 2005
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:17 am Post subject: |
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The content of your letter is good but cut it down to 3 or 4 paragraphs.
Your photo is fine if you're applying to work with elementary age children in a hagwan. If you're applying for a public school position then a photo of you wearing a collared shirt at least might look better; or send both. If you're applying to teach adults or at a uni find a photo of you wearing a suit =)
If you're applying for a job in childrens hagwan then you'll have 0 problems and a job within about 20 minutes; it's a jobseekers market right now. |
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Dodgy Al
Joined: 15 May 2004 Location: Seoul
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:10 am Post subject: |
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I pretty much agree with what everyone else said. Perhaps a little too much bollocks, but as with resumes, cover letters are quite subjective.
I did notice one small typo though:
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It is important for me to do everything I can, to help the students improve their English in a comfortable and stimulating environment. |
Best of luck. |
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chris_J2

Joined: 17 Apr 2006 Location: From Brisbane, Au.
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:25 am Post subject: Check |
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...my attached resume, my experience and qualifications match this position's requirements.
My experience of the last two years teaching in Asia, has been a great opportunity for me to prove myself as a teacher. I judge my success on the happiness and progress of my students. Researching, trying and testing teaching strategies in the classroom is the key to successful teaching.
It is important for me to do everything I can to help the students improve their English, in a comfortable and stimulating environment. I genuinely enjoy working with English language learners of all ages. My students usually appreciate my efforts, and together we create a fun, productive atmosphere to work in. |
There are 2 Typos, & there need to be a couple more commas. |
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Netz

Joined: 11 Oct 2004 Location: a parallel universe where people and places seem to be the exact opposite of "normal"
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:09 am Post subject: |
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The letter is fine, especially considering the liklihood of anyone outside this board actually reading it (and the fact it was cut/copy/pasted haha).
Honestly, I don't think any Korean agency/employer in the children's EFL industry wouldn't strain themselves past the resume, and that's with a good photo. Who knows though, it may show how "dilligent" you are in maintaining your professionalism.
On second thought, skip the cover letter, and get downtown in suit and tie to have some nice 8x10 photoshopped glossies made up. That WILL impress the hell out of them lololol.
I hate to say it, but this is the only country I've ever lived in that a photo-resume was the expected norm.
Say CHEESE! 
Last edited by Netz on Wed Jan 16, 2008 9:27 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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yingwenlaoshi

Joined: 12 Feb 2007 Location: ... location, location!
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:27 am Post subject: |
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Dear Korea,
Me teachee. You pay.
Ok |
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bassexpander
Joined: 13 Sep 2007 Location: Someplace you'd rather be.
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:59 am Post subject: |
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I think the kids are really getting bigger these days, that's what I think! |
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Yu_Bum_suk

Joined: 25 Dec 2004
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 6:17 pm Post subject: |
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What kind of job do you want? |
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PRagic

Joined: 24 Feb 2006
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 6:27 pm Post subject: |
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"Researching, trying and testing teaching strategies in the classroom is key to successful teaching."
You are preaching, and not conneting this with your own philosophy or experience. The sentence is also awkard.
As other posters have noted, though, the odds on anyone reading this and giving it a serious critique are slim to none.
Good luck to you. |
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cbclark4

Joined: 20 Aug 2006 Location: Masan
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 7:18 pm Post subject: |
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OP, are you trying to make us look bad.
I remember when I was interviewed the interviewer asked me if I could
email a writing sample. I said do you have my cover letter? He said yes.
I said I wrote that. |
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