Korean Job Discussion Forums

[JAWINSEOUL]

While I was walking through a subway corridor last night I witnessed a guy beating the snot out of his girlfriend. Full on pushing, screaming and some fierce open hand hits to her head. A crowd of Korean stood by and watched the entire thing. At one point a single man briefly intervened, but walked away after a failed attempt to diffuse the anger of the younger man.

Which brings me to the poll, what would you have done if you were there. I just stood by and let it all unfold like everyone else. I�ve been in Korea for three years and I know all to well how we are treated when we stick our nose in the business of native Koreans. It was difficult to not jump in, but considering I�m not Korean and it was a domestic issue I felt I had far too much to risk getting involved.

I did pose the obvious rhetorical question to the crowd. Asking them if anyone was going to help out or just stand by and watch.

[Otherside]

Perhaps this has alot to do with my being relativly new to Korea.
I would have tried to stop it, maybe pull him away, maybe get between the two of them. I wouldn't have thrown a punch unless one was thrown at me first... All that being said, I havent actually been in a situation of witnessing guy on girl violence...

[Ginormousaurus]

It's a tough situation for sure. And one I've only had the misfortune to be in once. A friend and I were having a beer one night outside of a convenience store. We were having fun watching a young couple (mid 20s) having an argument. Things really started to heat up and she tried a couple times to walk away, finally attempted to run. He grabbed her and threw her to the ground, wound up and kicked her in the head. I then jumped up, walked up to the guy and beat the crap out of him. As soon as I laid off, he started shouting about how that was his girlfriend (as if that justifies it) and she starts shouting at me that he was her boyfriend. A bunch of people saw it go down and one Korean woman suggested I leave before police come. I ran off and that was the end of it.

Had you hit the guy, it would have been on camera and you would have gotten in a lot of trouble. So you probably did the right thing. I suppose that if I were to see something like that happening in a subway station, I'd do the same as you.

[Scotticus]

[jvalmer]

I once saw a scuffle between a man and a woman in the very very early morning. I told my friend that we should intervene. But, she said not to. Apparantly, the woman, was trying to stop her husband from driving off in their car drunk. The scuffle lasted maybe 30 seconds, mostly pushing and shoving and ended with the woman dragging her husband off somewhere else. All on a busy street and nobody got involved.

Before being told why it happened, I just assumed it was just some guy beating on a girl. But because of my lack of Korean, I assumed wrong.

I'd say don't get involved, because in most cases both would probably turn against you. And I think most of these Korean women are pretty violent creatures that can take care of themselves.

[thegadfly]

You need an "other" option.

In the past, I would have physically interposed myself between them, but now I am a bit nervous about actually touching an angry drunk guy first (from a strictly legal perspective -- don't understand the laws governing self-defense, if such a concept exists in Korean law...I just know approximately how much damage I can do before being deported, and that some doctors will "doctor" the report to make the fellow look like he was more hurt than is true...).

Two nights ago, two guys were going at it in the parking lot of my building, with a screaming woman being flung aside and a toddler walking around, crying, unattended, about 10 feet from the road. There was a crowd of onlookers, but no one helped the woman, child, or tried to stop the guys. I put my face about 2 inches from theirs and screamed "ya," then proceeded to scream at them in my broken Korean about how bad they were, how bad they looked, how they needed to straighten up and act right, and to be careful of the woman and the child. Shocked them into a momentary lull in the fight -- maybe 5 seconds, but when they went right back at it, a bunch of the onlookers jumped in and pulled the guys apart...I couldn't shame the morons into not knocking over a woman and kid, but I could shame the gawkers into doing something....

[Bibbitybop]

Knock the man out, or down, or both and run like hell before the cops show up.

[Julius]

I have interevened and tackled the guy twice in such situations, however after being here for so long I'm not sure if I could really be bothered anymore. Its a high risk for you as a foreigner to do anything.

The satisfaction from doing something to help is great, however.

[kermo]

A couple months ago, I walked out of my apartment at about 8 in the evening, and ahead of me on the sidewalk I saw a man with a woman in a headlock. She slowly crumpled to the ground. She was whimpering and looked unhappy and lethargic, possibly drunk. I was with a Korean girl and two foreign guys. The two foreign guys walked by-- this surprised me as laying hands on a woman is normally cause for chivalry in their culture, but they said they didn't recognize that it was woman (maybe they were trying not to look.)

Anyway, I couldn't walk by. I approached the woman, and said (in Korean) "Are you okay?" She was weeping, but she said she was okay. I said to the man, gently, in English (I was a bit shaken up) "Please stop... please stop." He told me (in Korean) to just go away.

I consulted with my Korean friend, explaining that I couldn't just ignore this bullying, but she couldn't think of a course of action that was both helpful and safe.

Finally, I decided that I might do some good by just standing there looking concerned, so the violence wouldn't escalate. He was apparently embarrassed, so he let her go and she shuffled away. He followed a few steps behind her, and she turned, yelled at him, and started slapping him.

At this point, I gave up. She had a chance to get out of the situation, and she chose to create further drama instead. I was disappointed, but my conscience was clear.

[Hank the Iconoclast]

I will not tolerate seeing a woman getting the snot beat out of her. At least not in Korea.

[Tony_Balony]

[VanIslander]

[yingwenlaoshi]

The blood money thing is maybe one of the things I hate most about Korea.

[aarontendo]

Just let it ride. Not a popular opinion on these boards but not much to be done about it. Truth of the matter is the girl will probably just run after her oppa after it's all said and done.

You might even make it worse by stepping in.

[OneWayTraffic]

If you have a camera you could take some pictures of it and say it's for your blog.