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jaderedux
Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Location: Lurking outside Seoul
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 Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 3:04 am Post subject: topic two--Jade gets Married |
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Okay BF (Korean) want to get married and I am about to agree. We will marry here in Korea...so my question is.....what kind of paper work will I need....Miss Jade is from America.
Thanks for the help in advance....
Jade the very nervous |
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peppermint
Joined: 13 May 2003
Location: traversing the minefields of caddishness.
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 3:05 am Post subject: |
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Dunno anything about the paperwork, but congrats.  |
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ryleeys
Joined: 22 Dec 2003
Location: Columbia, MD
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 3:07 am Post subject: |
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| I am very sad to hear of yet another wonderful woman taken off the market... c'est la vie... at least she's happy. |
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anae
Joined: 13 May 2003
Location: cowtown
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 9:03 am Post subject: |
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Congrats!
Unfortunately I am a Canadian, so I can't give US advice. However, it will involve going to your embassy getting the inital paperwork and then visiting the Dong office.
It is quite painless really. I didn't even have to go to the dong office. The wedding has no legal meaning, so no need to worry about proper officiators and signing the register. We started the paperwork before we had the wedding and then finished it afterward.
Help and support from fellow women married or going to be married to Koreans can be found at www.iskakorea.com. They were a godsend to me my first year of marriage. |
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crazylemongirl
Joined: 23 Mar 2003
Location: almost there...
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 9:05 am Post subject: |
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congrats jade! One of my kiwi workmates got married to a korean and I warn you they had to get a lot of korean stuff translated, marriage certificates, birth certificates etc.
clg |
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Mr. Pink
Joined: 21 Oct 2003
Location: China
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 12:26 pm Post subject: |
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| crazylemongirl wrote: |
congrats jade! One of my kiwi workmates got married to a korean and I warn you they had to get a lot of korean stuff translated, marriage certificates, birth certificates etc.
clg |
Why's that? Did they marry in kiwiland?
I married in Korea. I had to goto the embassy and get two papers, then we had to goto the GU office, not the dong office. At the GU office we registered our marriage on the Korean family register, and the GU official stamped something on the Canadian documents. Then we went back to the embassy, had some consular come out and stamp our certificate.
So I have it registered in both countries, was pretty painless. |
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anae
Joined: 13 May 2003
Location: cowtown
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 1:52 pm Post subject: |
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Gu office not Dong office! 
Thanks Mr. Pink. |
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hellofaniceguy
Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Location: On your computer screen!
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 4:02 pm Post subject: |
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Well, while I'm happy for you and your pending marriage, I'll get flamed for this but I don't care, why marry a korean male? Especially with all the crap that they do in korea and the way they treat women after marriage. Most of the foreign women who married korean males, end up regreting it after a few years according to surveys that have been done and posted over the years as well as the number of foreign women who have divorced their korean husbands. Secondly, the discrimination of women. And my biggest grip is the two faced discrimination laws from immigration and endorsed by the ROK government with regards to foreign men who marry korean women. A foreign women marrying a korean male gets the same rights as a korean woman marrying a korean male. Not so a foreign man marrying a korean woman. Check it out for yourself. Maybe you have met someone who is different.... hope so. Anyway, good luck. To answer your question...
you'll have to jump through hoops... get this and that document signed, visit your embassy, visit the local offices...
It's EASIER just to fly to Guam, American territory, and marry. No Visa needed for koreans. |
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Mr. Pink
Joined: 21 Oct 2003
Location: China
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 4:30 pm Post subject: |
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| hellofaniceguy wrote: |
It's EASIER just to fly to Guam, American territory, and marry. No Visa needed for koreans. |
Ok put the crack pipe down and get back to reality.
They could register to be married right now if they want. I am sure it is the wedding ceremony that keeps them in Korea. I guess someone who isn't married to a Korean shouldn't be commenting on this thread. If you are married to a Korean, well I feel sorry for her, as you have no cultural sensitivity. |
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peppergirl
Joined: 07 Dec 2003
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 4:46 pm Post subject: |
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Jade, CONGRATULATIONS!
I am also one of those western women married to a Korean guy, and I haven't regretted it for a second yet!!!
Married life has been great, not that different to when we were just living together (in Japan), except that his family consider me a family member now.
hellofaniceguy, do you have any links to those surveys you talk about???
About the different laws for foreign females marrying korean men and foreign men marrying korean women, that was the case but the laws have been changed so both foreign women and men both don't get the same rights as Korean women/men (foreign females could get Korean nationality when they married a Korean man, this was not the case for foreign men marrying Korean women, now neither can get Korean nationality that easily).
And I don't think Jade and her BF will be jumping through hoops to get married, it's relatively easy to get married in Korea! |
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peppergirl
Joined: 07 Dec 2003
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Pyongshin Sangja
Joined: 20 Apr 2003
Location: I love baby!
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 7:20 pm Post subject: |
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| Is this the same guy who gave you hell for talking to strangers in the neighbourhood because it made you look like a woman of questionable morals? Congratulations. |
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jaderedux
Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Location: Lurking outside Seoul
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 7:52 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: |
| Is this the same guy who gave you hell for talking to strangers in the neighbourhood because it made you look like a woman of questionable morals? Congratulations. |
I am trying to keep a civil tounge in my head. Yes, you peice of crap it is....it has been a long hard road but we have been willing to work on the differences. It isn't always easy. The summer was a tough time for us. We broke up for awhile because I was so concerned about his women issues. He has come a long way...all he asks is that I explain these things to him and help him understand. We have worked out a lot issues like this...it isn't always easy but it is always worth it.
Love isn't all hearts and flowers....it is work and learning to live with the good the bad and finding some middle ground. (Something you have no knowledge of) I didn't know if I could but he travelled a long way mentally and emotionally to be with me ...and I try my best to do the same.
There is alot of things I want to say right now but the fact that I have manners (Again, something you are obviously unfamilar with) and they would get censored anyway.
Love is worth the effort....at your tender age I doubt you understand....your politics...your incessant need to be right and be noticed I am sure far exceeds any ability you might have for learning to be in a give and take relationship. Is it easy???...Hell no! But any relationship I had with western men wasn't easy either....just different problems.
| Quote: |
| Well, while I'm happy for you and your pending marriage, I'll get flamed for this but I don't care, why marry a korean male? Especially with all the crap that they do in korea and the way they treat women after marriage. Most of the foreign women who married korean males, end up regreting it after a few years according to surveys that have been done and posted over the years as well as the number of foreign women who have divorced their korean husbands. Secondly, the discrimination of women. |
These things were things I considered before accepting. We have talked about it in great detail. We will have seperate financial entities. He has also signed a pre-nup agreeing that any assets I hold in America are solely mine. Any assets accumlated in Korea will be shared equally. Now this sounds a little cold and harsh but he thought it would be for the best. For my piece of mind. These were drawn up in English and Korean. I had a Lawyer in America review the Korean copy too. (He is Korean expat immigration lawyer)
So now that our financial rights are clear with each other we can concentrate on living a life together. We agreed I will work after we get married and if we have children we will have to learn to share duties. But all of these things we talked about FIRST before deciding to get married. I told him I would do the bowing thing at Chusok and New Year. It is a small price and only showing a bit of respect. I can do that for someone I care about. We will live in Korea for awhile then we will probably live in America.
As for the second part of your post. I agree! It sucks that if a man wants to marry a Korean woman he damn near has to cough up a pint of blood and pound of flesh. I hope this changes. Actually being a western woman it is alot easier for me I think. If he changes dramatically or becomes some horrible stereotype of a Korean adjossi then I have options. This is not the same for Korean women.
For those of you who offered congrats and even-tempered, well-thought out advice...thank you very much all your help and your advice is appreciated.
Will keep you updated.
Jade |
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Blue Flower
Joined: 23 Feb 2003
Location: The realisation that I only have to endure two more weeks in this filthy, perverted, nasty place!
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 9:25 pm Post subject: |
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| Congratulations Jade! I'm very happy for you. Good luck with the wedding, are you doing it in a hall, or going full traditional style? |
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Corporal
Joined: 25 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Sun Jan 04, 2004 11:47 pm Post subject: |
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Good luck and congratulations, Jade, I'm happy you are joining the ranks. You are right; every relationship requires work, so it's largely a matter of discussing and understanding the things that you might fight over--beforehand, which it seems like you've done.
I wish you and your man all possible happiness. |
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