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What is the point of marriage?
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Nomadder



Joined: 16 May 2008

PostPosted: Sat Jun 14, 2008 10:45 pm    Post subject: What is the point of marriage? Reply with quote

I don't get it. Anything you want from a relationship can be attained without legally binding your existence to that of another human being.

Sex? If this is the case then either your own desperation, or your religion is driving you to this. I won't comment in either case.

Love? If you want to be with someone then be with them. Why write up a contract about it to punish each other if you have a fallling out further down the road?

Financial reasons? Hm... This seems to be the most valid reason. (not saying its a good one...) Whether its your stereotypical gold digger, or someone who wants a better visa or citzenship in another country.

Other "security" concerns? If this is the case then maybe you should endeavor to figure out how to overcome your fears/security reasons on your own rather than cast your fate with someone else. (Whether its "I need someone to take care of me" or "I'm afraid to be alone".)

Biology? The need to get and rear offspring? Again, do we need a contract for this? Perhaps some see this as a means of insuring against single parenting? Maybe the marriage contract is seen as making it more difficult for one partner to leave the other to raise the child(ren) by ones self? That may seem a little calculating, but perhaps it's not as deliberate as that...

Just to make it clear I'm not anti-relationship. I'm not even anti-long-term relationship.
(Also, hopefully it is immediately obvious that this post isn't directed specifically at either sex.)

I just don't understand why people have allowed themselves to become so conditioned, as to automatically equate love with what is essentially a legal document. It seems somewhat perverse to me.

I'm interested in reading posts from all sorts. Whether you've sworn off marriage (something I haven't done... who knows...), are married, or are planning on getting married...

Why?

What does marriage mean to you?
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Bearach



Joined: 12 Mar 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'll never get married, but if someone else does, it doesn't particularly bother me.
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curlygirl



Joined: 26 Mar 2007
Location: Pundang, Seohyeon dong

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Seconded. Bearach, assuming you're a guy, wanna not get married to me?
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dmbfan



Joined: 09 Mar 2006

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
What does marriage mean to you?



To begin with...........um...............on that note...........er..........well.......so I think it should be said that................

phuck.


I've got nothing.


dmbfan
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Bearach



Joined: 12 Mar 2008

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

curlygirl wrote:
Bearach, assuming you're a guy, wanna not get married to me?

I'm a guy, and I'll have to think about it!
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dmbfan



Joined: 09 Mar 2006

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
I'm a guy, and I'll have to think about it!



Can of worms has now been opened.


dmbfan
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nautilus



Joined: 26 Nov 2005
Location: Je jump, Tu jump, oui jump!

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I kind of agree with the OP.

most single koreans i know are desperately trying to get married. most married people wish they were single. its stupid.

However the best reason for legally binding marriage I can think of is: it provides a secure framework for the children to grow up in.
kids need the committed attention of both parents.
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crescent



Joined: 15 Jan 2003
Location: yes.

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The reasons are all financial. It's been that way since the days of arranged marriages.
Money.

Only now, instead of merging two estates, we get a plethora of tax breaks, reduced insurance rates, and lower loan interest.

In Korea, we get more employment freedom.
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nicholas_chiasson



Joined: 14 Jun 2007
Location: Samcheok

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

if marriage is all about money why do the poor get married? they used to. In fact women have married men who could barely provide for themselves.
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nautilus



Joined: 26 Nov 2005
Location: Je jump, Tu jump, oui jump!

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 12:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

nicholas_chiasson wrote:
why do the poor get married? they used to.


Did they stop?
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crescent



Joined: 15 Jan 2003
Location: yes.

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 1:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

nicholas_chiasson wrote:
if marriage is all about money why do the poor get married? they used to. In fact women have married men who could barely provide for themselves.

You're not getting it. Married couples are financially better off. Poor or not.

I'm not saying it's THE REASON that people get married, but it is a reason why marriage can be a good idea. It's a reason why I would consider such a thing.
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Stormy



Joined: 10 Jan 2008
Location: Here & there

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 1:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It keeps marriage celebrants employed.
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peppermint



Joined: 13 May 2003
Location: traversing the minefields of caddishness.

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 1:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I don't really get the big marriage ceremony thing, but getting married provides lots of legal rights too. Stuff like being able to adopt children, ability to have a say in treatment if one partner were very ill etc
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tigerbluekitty



Joined: 19 Apr 2007

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 1:58 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think marriage is for the sake of children.

Really sick of hearing stories of men who run off leaving women to take care of and provide for children themselves.
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nobbyken



Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Location: Yongin ^^

PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 2:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

As a single guy I always felt incomplete, something missing.
I felt I had another half so when we met it was a natural progression to marriage.


Genesis 2:18
The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
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