Korean Job Discussion Forums

[rhinocharge64]

What's your thoughts on Korean parental skills? I was having dinner last night and whilst four yacking ajumma drank beer and ate like there was no tomorrow their kids ran amock. Returning for glass of coke and being given food to yes run around with. Now I was taught to sit at the table whilst eating, good manners always reinforced. I also see kids throwing a tauntrum and mothers giving in. It's not a particular could strategy of showing no means no!!!

I'm from the U.K. and I've seen the effects of poor parenting skills and it aint pretty. I think it explains the current situation regarding British society. I taught key stage 3 and 4 and the courses I went on for the main part focused on behaviour strategies. It was obvious from my time in teaching that their parents hadn't inforced behaviour. Stabbings amongst youths is now at chronic propotions and the good people are emigrating on mass.

So, what's the future for Korea!!! Will the lack of parental skills result in a similar situation. It would take a good number of years but I fear for the current generation right now in Korea!! Your thoughts.

[Underwaterbob]

I would say no better or worse than anywhere else. I've seen some atrocious parenting everywhere I've ever spent any time.

To quote Keanu Reeves in one of his best roles ever:

"You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car - hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father."

[rhinocharge64]

Indeed fella, I couldn't agree more.

[crescent]

Canadian hockey parents are comparable.

[Whistleblower]

My wife is a great mother so I don't like the way you decide to put every group into this self proclaimed package, for example "all Koreans are bad parents", as you ask about the thoughts of "Korean" parental skills.

However, like everywhere, there are good and down right bad parents. I remember catching the bus in Southampton in the UK, and the teenage parents had just put their kid in one seat whilst the parents sat in another seat. The kid had nails like Wolverine and scratches all over it's face. The parents had failed to cut this kid's nails for months (perhaps a year). Thus, I often think that UK parenting sometimes is poor. Meanwhile the parents in the seat in front were swearing, showing off and smoking in a bus. Great.

So to answer your question, the UK does have some slightly questionable teenage parents who would rather get stoned, spend time sleeping around and bouncing from one relationship to another. How does a kid have any stability? No wonder the kids don't have a role model and any desire to succeed in their life.

Meanwhile in Korea the mother often gives the kid to the grandparents and then she is off shuttling around the shops to get her daily manicure, shopping fix and meet some single man for oral exchange quietly mentioned as English lessons. The father spends most of his life at work and drinks huge quantities of alchohol and rarely spends 10 minutes with his child. The child grows up with no attachment to their father, as they are not around, and with some really over protective mothers. No wonder kids in this culture are so shy.

So, which is best. Well no one is best as each country has their own way of raising their kids, whether it be good or bad. But the good thing about Britain is the fact that there are protective services available for children in case they have bad parents. In Korea, bad parents just raise their kids however they see fit. But chalk and cheese really.

[rhinocharge64]

To the last poster I'm not grouping all parents in the same category. I'm sure your wife is a great mother and countless others, but I do see on a day to day basis lots of poor parental skills. I think you made a valid point in regards to absent fathers here, and I do think this is a detrement to the child, indeed just like the U.K. The difference is they aint working, but lots of these youths are just taking the dole!!!

[Newbie]

There are some definitely questionable things I see a lot of:

No car seats
Kids running in and out of busy streets
Smoking around kids
Beating kids
Parents frequently coming home drunk


Yes, komerican, the West is worst. We know.

[polonius]

I believe that parenting skills are learned or passed down from parent to child. I have always said that if I could be 1/4 the father to my son that my father was to me, I will be in good standing. I learned so much from my parents, and those are the lessons I want to pass on to my son. I love being a father and spending time with my son. It is too bad that I don't get as much time to spend with him as I would like, but my wife is doing an excellent job. We are both Canadians, but I really don't believe that country of origin has anything to do with what kind of parent you will be. I understand that this is not what you are saying.

When I went back to Canada last month I witnessed one of the major downfalls of parenting skills. There are many youth that have a lack of respect for others, and therefore have no respect for themselves. A lot of parents expect the schools to educate their children in all areas. However, it is very evident that the well balanced youth are those that receive life lessons from their parents. Honestly, I don't want the school system to be the lead role in teaching my son morals, that is my job, and something I look forward to.

I perceive the major issue being that parents don't spend enough time with their children. Workplaces are placing more demands on parents, and the children are the victims.

[Kiarell]

oh no, bad parenting, this is the end of civilization. I know how you feel, OP. I'm not a Brit, but the US is facing a huge economic crisis and if it's anything like yours it's from bad parenting. Why do non-whites have to be such deadbeet fathers?

On a serious note, though, I don't htink it's alack of caring so much as ignorance that lets Koreans put 2-year old children on their lap when driving. I mean, c'mon, a fender bender would send the babies flying headfirst into the windshield. They seem to care about the health of kids and my PS gives special exercise programs to the fat kids. I also like to point out that late sleep, high salt, purely white rice, and stress add to the weight problem, but people just seem confused by these suggestions. There's just so much misinformation flying around, like fan death and this bit that "It's not healthy to drink a lot of water within half an hour of lunch". It's not stupidity, it's just there's no way of knowing. And I don't expect much help (like PSAs)--or honesty--from a government that lists fan death statistics every year and puts out warnings.

[Yu_Bum_suk]

I've been back in Canada the past week and a half, and I have to say that there is a bit better effort by Canadian parents to keep kids in check in public, but like everywhere, some kids seem better in public than others. I have to say that there are a lot of Indian parents whose 'who cares' attitude about their children disturbing others seems similar to many Koreans. Thankfully at restaurants most parents in Canada seem to see kids running around as a major no-no. Not sitting on the floor where little kids can easily go exploring other tables probably helps.

[buttons]

last week i was in a pizza restaurant in suwon when i witnessed a 4 year old with his pants down and his father holding a bottle for him to piss into in the middle of the restaurant. the toilets were only around the corner! i understand that it may be cultural, but c'mooon.

what's that teaching the boy?!

[rhinocharge64]

Polinous a good point regarding learning from your parents. I'm not saying it's the end of civilaziation, but these whipper snappers are the future!!! In the U.K. the kids no all about their rights, but nothing about their responsibilities, hence the decline in society. This goes way back to the eighties when divorce and general neglect in large proportions began to take place. Now for me here in Korea, I'm seeing lots of neglect and the divorce rate is high. Kids like boundaries they just aint been set!!! They certainly don't get given boundaries in hogwons, which is where most spend their time.

[nautilus]

[Kiarell]