Korean Job Discussion Forums

[blurgalurgalurga]

"When I was a kid, we were really, really tough. We'd walk to school on our hands, kicking the hell out of each other along the way. When we got to school our teachers would whack the soles of our feet with cacti (which is actually why we started being such good hand-walkers in the first place) and then dip us in tar to make us stick to our seats.

"And we were smart, too. We all had all of Plutarch's "Lives" committed to memory, even the missing ones, before we were allowed to graduate kindergarten. Then we'd translate them into Swahili, Sanskrit, Portugese, and Korean, just to stay fresh, and then we'd have a summer camp on Dok-do. We swam there. Students who took short cuts were drowned. I drowned a couple times myself but it didn't take.

"Then I turned seven..."

Ok, your turn.

[uberscheisse]

i'm smart.

[5600]

I spent several weeks on the road with the Ramones circa 85ish. I saw the original Misfits. I rode a few pools with JFA, got high with Suicidal. I know Joe Queer. I go ice climbing at O2. I play a mean guitar and have a big amp. I have a Black Flag tattoo that is older than you. I've survived a hardcore matinee at CBGB's. I know Metal Mike and Ben Weasel. I talked to Joey Shithead not to long ago about playing in Korea. I know Merle Allin. I've been to Russia. I've seen the Cure more times than I will admit. I have a German Iron Cross tattoo on my wrist. Plus I've done things.

[Czarjorge]

I'm smart. So smart I won't lower myself by taking part in this thread.

[warren pease]

When i was younger I had really terrible sex with a very unattractive woman who later bore my child. He's not much in the brains department but he claims that the following is all true. Personally, I think he's a lying sack of dung, but that's just my opinion.

[blurgalurgalurga]

"...and then, when I turned seven, I invented the internet. It seemed like a good idea at the time. I didn't want to publicize it too much though, for that would be boastful. So, I let some dweebs from California take the credit and make the money. Money is not important to me because I already have more than all of you put together.
"On my eighth birthday I got simultaneous PhD's from Oxford, Yale, and Columbia, in seventeen different faculties. This caused an epidemic of shamed suicides...my profs were all bummed because I made them feel so dumb. I brought them back to life, though, with the Resurrector 3000 machine I'd invented during one of my smoke breaks. Yeah, I smoke...what's the big deal? I already invented the cure for cancer anyway."

[flakfizer]

I never have problems with Koreans bothering because I stand over six feet tall, weigh over 200 pounds, and am quite imposing!

I've lived in Korea for many years and have never had bad experiences or complained because I've adjusted superbly!

I got an office job back home and furthermore, the office is situated near a station!

I find Korean comdoms too small for me!

I teach 8 hours a week at a uni, and make 8 million a month teaching morning business privates to boot!

Korean ladies drape all over me at clubs even when they're not yet fully drunk!

I've gotten many articles published by the Korean Herald despite their being inaccurate and poorly written!

I'm the only known foreigner to have experienced "jung!"

I have managed to post at least ten times a day for three straight years despite the fact that on some of those days, at least 7 of the posts were done while I was drunk!

My kid speaks more languages than your kid!

I've been to Thailand way more than you, and what is more, I know the coolest, out-of-the-way places there!

Throughout history, many people from my home country have accompished some pretty impressive stuff!

I have never met a western woman in Korea who lives up to my lofty standards!

I have rebutted more arguments by simply using a "" in the past week than most people have in their entire lives!

[it's full of stars]

My shit does not stink.

[genezorm]

i think an easier way to do this would just be to ask people on this site, who has a good job in korea?

i like reading about the hundreds of people who make over 5 million a month with 8 months vacation and work 2 hours a day

[blurgalurgalurga]

That's true...

My job here's pretty sweet. I work about two hours a year at my world-class University, and the rest of the time is paid holiday. They have statues of me and stuff...

I don't even need to attend class, my students just look into the mirror and say my name three times, "blurgalurgalurgalurga, blurgalurgalurgalurga, blurgalurgalurgalurga," and the day's lesson is telepathically injected into their brains.

They pay me well. So well in fact that I don't even really need money at all any more. Money for me is like air. I roll around naked in my 40 000 pyong apartment, sack-deep in coins like uncle Scrooge McDuck, loving my money and my money loving me...it's all in Krugerands of course. Won is for the poor.

Oh, did I mention that I also own a fleet of luxury helicopters?

[JongnoGuru]

My Maserati does 185.

[blurgalurgalurga]

Yeah, but you lost your license, and now you don't drive.

[cdninkorea]

[pootle]

Everyone is so intimidated by my boasting that this thred died. Sadly before I had the chance to tell you about the time me and my mate Micky Jags were hanging out at Dickie Branson's pad and ...

Neh, won't bother.

[blurgalurgalurga]

Yeah, I remember that party, sort of. I was the one with the entourage of Russian oligarchs' surgically enhanced daughters. It was really more work, though, than party, as they were all paying me in cars and dachas and Faberge Eggs and stuff to be their tutor for the evening...we went to so many parties that night, though; I'm sorry, Pootle, I don't remember you.