Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Leaver]

I apologise in advance for a bit of a long rant but I need some advice.

I've been at my new job for almost 4 months and about 2 months ago, as I was coming out of the bathroom after a shower, I noticed somebody was looking in my window. (I live on the ground floor). I notified my director about what happened. I told him that my windows would not lock properly and I wanted to replace them immediately. He said he would look into it.

In the next week or two, I would come home to noticed my window had been opened when I know I had shut it before going to work. Every day I was asking my director to fix the window or to give me the number of somebody that could do it for me and I would call them (using broken Korean of course). In the meantime, things went missing from my washing line. Once again, I kept being assured that they were going to fix it and to not do anything until they had. And me being a sucker, I didn't. I feel like such an idiot, because I'm not a newbie and know that things don't get done here unless you do them yourself.

Then last night at about 1:30am, I noticed it was getting cold in my apartment. I went to my laundry and noticed that my window was open once again. I went to shut it and noticed there was a shadow next to my window. I took a step back and someone tried to reach into my apartment and grab me. I shouted at him and closed and locked the sliding door to the laundry and double checked that my doors had been locked properly. He was shaking the bars on my windows and kept looking in. I turned off my lights so he couldn't keep looking in.

I considered calling the police, but having had to deal with them before, I know that not much would or could be done so I called my coworker (foreign). He came around and was checking around my building and helped me secure my window so no one could try to open it again. He then stayed for a while ( I think he could tell I was quite freaked out) and helped me take my mind off of it. When he left, I was too terrified to sleep.

Now when this first started to happen, I told them I wanted to move to another building that was secure and not on the ground floor. They said ok but I would have to pay the extra rent and basically were being a*holes about it. They said I couldn't move apartments until my current apartment is sold. My course of action today is demanding that I be moved ASAP and in the meantime, they will have to ensure my safety. My co-worker also said I should file a report with the police because if something does actually happen to me, they'll have on file that I had already made a complaint.

So that's what has happened up until now. I hope I haven't left any important details out. I'm quite the wary person here, having dealt with creepy Korean guys before. So I'm asking for any advice on what my next course of action should be. Is there something I've overlooked? Thanks for your help in advance.

[waseige1]

Can you buy a locking rod like they use on sliding glass doors? I know this probably does not solve all the fears, but it might be a short term fix and is certainly better than nothing.

I recently put two in my sister's house on windows she uses with air conditioners.

It is a rod (much like a shower rod only shorter) that extends between two sliding parts.

Just an idea.
Good luck.

[RACETRAITOR]

Refuse to work until your boss starts taking your safety seriously. You could've been murdered in your sleep. It should be your priority to go home, pack up everything you own, and get it out of there. I recommend taking it to work, so your boss will have a reminder that you demand immediate action. You have every right to be freaked out, traumatised, and making a scene over this.

Don't bother trying to secure the window. Get the hell out of that apartment. Living on the bottom floor is a bad, bad idea.

Oh, and forget about the police. They'll just ask you if you were inviting the intruder in, or if you like rough sex with anonymous intruders.

[Leaver]

Thanks for your replies so far. I've already torn my director a new a**shole for not moving me sooner, but I'll definitely be taking your advice. I'm off to work now (and taking anything of value with me) and I'll let you know how it pans out. Thanks again!

And to all the other ladies out there, please be careful. Please. I've had too many bad experiences all because I thought it could never happen to me. I now know better.

[plynx]

[cazzy3]

demand that they find you a new place. if you have to, stay in a hotel for a week or with a friend for your own safety and mental health.

i had a somewhat mentally challenged stalker/intruder at my place and your right about people not taking it too seriously. out on the streets i would let him pet my belgian shepherd and then he thought he'd come to my house and see the dog. at first he would knock slowly and the dog would begin barking...i told him in korean not to come to my house...he continued. i saw his parents (he's probably 22), and told them to keep their child from coming to my place, but like many mentally challenged people, they don't seem to have any facilities and just let him roam. (sorry for the term).

final straw was the fact he began looking in my windows and even opened the door once when i had left in unlocked...i really had hoped my dog would bite him. i had to physically push him out of the stairway and told my school i was moving out by the end of the week.

sorry for telling my story, but if it's a 'crazy' person, you need to get out because it will only escalate.

good luck.

[Mix1]

[Leaver]

Thanks for your kind wishes guys. Have a bit of a break here at work so I thought I'd update. I talked to my director and he said he "understood my situation" and that the only problem is that because the lease isn't finished yet, I can't move until they sell my current apartment because they'll have to keep paying rent on that apartment until it's sold (Something which he can't afford and he just bought this school from my previous director). I told them that's not really my problem and they would have more problems than just the rent if they tried to ignore this.

I tried to be fair and come up with a solution. The only one I could think of was moving in with one of my foreign coworkers, thus sharing the key money and rent that the director is being so precious about. But it's still not ideal. The only apartments I looked at (when this all started) were 5 times smaller than my current apartment. I told them that it's not about having a massive apartment, it's about coming home to a place I feel comfortable in and satisfied with. Because until my contract is finished, that IS my home, not just a place to crash. But I think they would rather see me murdered or raped than to be "inconvenienced". I'm going to talk to my coworker and see if he would be up to the idea of sharing an apartment but I won't force it because it's not fair on him. I've also told them I'm not going home until a solution is found.

I am considering leaving this job. It's sad because I really do like my school and my coworkers. But if my director is willing to risk my safety (and my sanity), then I wouldn't be comfortable staying here. This has affected me so badly, I can't eat and I haven't slept in 36 hours. Another thing that I think is really stupid and hard to believe is that if you leave a lease early, you can't leave until the apartment is sold. It seems pressuring to find another apartment so quickly.

Well, back to work now. I'll let you know how things progress from here. Thanks again for your help.

[RACETRAITOR]

I'm trying to leave an apartment right now and having the same trouble.

Tell your employer that you'd be happy to stay in a hotel until the problem is taken care of, on his money.

[Mix1]

[Faunaki]

What a horrible situation. I would stay with a friend and quit the job you are at. Wait until payday and then never go back to work. Do a runner. Your safety is first.

[ChinaBoy]

Leave IMMEDIATELY. Stay in a hotel if you can until payday and then LEAVE. You get one life. Don't blow it. You're obviously in grave danger and I can not stress that enough.

It wasn't a one-time thing, it's a history of stalking. It will only get worse. There are many, many examples of waiting going horribly, horribly wrong.

[Draz]

Ugh, that's creepy.

[OiGirl]

I have a foreign friend who has never moved on less than twelve hours' notice. She wakes up in the morning and decides she will sleep in a new place that night. One move was when our home was broken into. You do not need to stay in that apartment one more night, and shouldn't.

[sojourner1]

That's like something out of a horror movie. What a bold move for him to reach in and grab you. It would be awesome to have had a big knife handy and you just wacked that perverts hand right off in a second. What could he do? Nothing since he was attacking you through a window. If you're a man, challenge him for a fight if he confronts you again or if you know he's present. Show that you will use weapons such as a knife or a crowbar as well as a terrible anger that could result in someone getting hurt or worse. If you're a woman, you can still do the same thing to defend yourself should you be in the grip of a maniac, but you gotta act and move very quickly. I'm not afraid to stand up and fight for my rights and my living space. Usually people will back down or never confront you again if you're quite serious. This is just absolutely ridiculous, but there sometimes comes a time that you have to fight people that throw nonsensical BS in your face.

Since Dark Shadow is trying to get at you, then he is probably stalking other people. I wonder what Koreans do when a threat like this is going on in a neighborhood? Probably stay quiet, not talk about it, and act like nothing is happening.