Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Panda]

I mentioned my true story in my first thread on Dave's.

Long story short, I met a 25 yo American guy (I am 29) months ago on a dating website and he came to my city to visit me, we both liked each other a lot but he suddenly disappeared for 2 months without any words, later he wrote back to me and told me he went abroad for a mission (he works in a company offerring service for US military), and now he wanted to see me again.


Updated:

We went for a short trip two weeks ago and had great time together. He seems to be a rarely nice guy, he doesnt drink or smoke, he doesnt go to bars. He is a soft guy who doesnt speak a lot but was very sweet when he talks to me. I asked all questions in my mind including how many women he met from that website; if he was seeing anyone else; why he disappeared suddenly after we met; if he wanted a relationship with me or just casually dating.

He confirmed me he wanted a relationship...so after that he became my boyfriend.

We didnt spend Xmas together though, he worked on Xmas day, but I was sure he didnt spend Xmas eve with other women cuz we talked on phone for long time that night.

Things seemed to go very smooth and very well, it was better than any previous one I had......

Last Friday night ( the day before yesterday), he called me and said he wanted to see me on Saturday, here is what happened on Saturday.

07:45: He----Goodmorning sweetheart, I have decided to come to your city, be there around 3:30 since you get off at 3, have a nice day at work,angel~!
07:50: Panda----I love you, cant wait to see you~!
14:57: He----Sorry, sweetheart, Im going to be about an hour late (>_<)
15:30: He didnt show up or call me.
17:25: He----I hate to do this and I hate myself doing this, but I cant see you again. I feel so terrible and I am sorry bt I am doing us both a favor, before things get out of hand, Just tell your friends I wasnt good enough for you and believe its true,thats the best I can do~
17:36: Panda----Do you want to talk? I wont get mad at you, but I think I want to know...
17:46: He----Sure, you deserve to know, honestly there is no specific reaason other than I feel its the right thing to do, you probably think thats stupid, nevertheless its my sudden revelation.
17:53: Panda----I believe and respect you, also I understand you. Best wishes to you and happy new year!
18:05: He----Thank you for everything and understanding, you are amazing woman, happy new year and god bless!

18:32: Panda----OK, I am home now, are you busy now? Can we talk on phone for a while? it will be civil.
18:42: He----Im on my way to my office, surprised? I am not busy. Driving now, can I call you when I get home? I shouldnt be too long, just send some faxes.
18:46: Panda----OK, I will be waiting, You should drive to my city and give me a goodbye kiss at least
18:52: He----You know if I do that I wont be able to stop, clever girl~!
19:08: Panda----Then lets not, Its unfair you thought its a trap, obviously I am not clever enough.
19:16: He----I never thought of it as a trap, in fact I was considering it...I should have said you were sweet instead of clever, that gave the wrong impression, I am sorry.
19:23: Panda----I was kidding you, lets talk after your work.
20:26: He called me, we talked for about a hour, he told me he made the decision because he thought he wanted to concentrate on his work and had no time to take care of a relationship and also he always had to travel and he didnt know how long he would be in Korea. I then asked him if he was afraid of being in a relationship or if we moved too fast, he said no to both.he said he wanted a relationship with me and he desired me. Then I insisted if he liked me, we should not break up, he said yes right after I said so.

22:06: He----I am home but I miss you and want to see you.
22:13: Panda----If you were here, I would cry, you owe me a Saturday and a kiss...I am writing you a letter.
22:18: He----I am so so sorry honey, I cant say it enough... I cant wait to read your letter.
22:19: Panda----You are mine, its all~!! no worry, I act ironically silly sometimes, especially when my period comes. I just realized how much I wanted to keep you around me...if there is any uncertainty,let me know, I am not only your lover but also your friend.
22:44: There is no uncertainty now angel, my heart is yours as long as you want it, I mean that with everything I am, Goodnight~!


Is it a drama, what the hell am I doing? Could anyone help me?

[Tiger Beer]

He's married.

Men don't 'hold back'...they don't think about 'work' vs. 'woman'. They also don't go to dating sites looking for relationships or hookups and then decide work is more important.

He's certainly hiding behind 'work' as an overall excuse. An hour chat on Christmas, means once everything settled down at home, and his wife was doing something else, he stepped out 'to get something' and gave you a call.

--

If he's not married...he's certainly playing one hell of game of 'cat and mouse'...

[Hyeon Een]

Yeah

Either he's married or he just read the book "Game Theory" haha. "Treat em mean and keep em keen"..

[browneyedgirl]

You have to pretend that you don't need them. They love that.

[Panda]

Yes, I need to ask him about the marriage.

I thought there was drama queen but no drama king.

Is it possible guys especially young guys to be that dramatic? How come he changed so quickly...........

It is like: Sunny----> Stormy----> Cloudy----> Sunny within 12 hours.

[tzechuk]

There certainly are drama kings. I've experienced it.

[Straphanger]

[Tiger Beer]

[ReeseDog]

It's possible, I suppose, that he's a defense contractor. It's also possible that he's a priest doing research for the Vatican.

More likely, he's full of sh!t, and you've been taken in by it.

The OP could just be trolling, y'all....

I find that to be the most likely scenario of all.

[Panda]

I would lose a big part of my face (maybe the part around my eyes) if he turned out to be a married guy or somthing, becuase up to now, I stubbornly believe he is single...

Sigh~! I just want a normal relationship, god, please be nicer to me~!

[pest2]

If its the same guy you posted about in another thread a couple of weeks ago, I thought he was married then and I think so even more strongly now.

Why dont you tell him you will come visit him at his home? Have you seen the inside of where ever it is he lives, yet?

If he is married, the longer you go on before you find out, the more face you will lose. Especially around the eyes. Better not wear eye liner and mascara on your trip to see him at his place.

[Yesterday]

[bassexpander]

Follow him. See if he's married. If he's married, then you'll at least know. What you do from there is your choice.

[poet13]

Oooo, he laid OpSec on you. Drop him. He's either married or too full of himself and his job.
If he was a contractor, it's very unlikely that he would deploy with that little notice.
In any case, any decent person would tell those close, "Hey, I'm going to do some training in (pick a state), so I'll be out of touch for a while."

[Panda]