Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Fishead soup]

How many out there have had this lovely experience. While a funeral in any culture is never pleasent
in Korea it's quite brutal. They usually last two to three days in that time no one is permitted to wash.

It's a massive outpouring of emotion with lots of Igosssss.

[RACETRAITOR]

I have to say I respect Korean funerals far more than weddings. You can't go wrong with nonstop free food and liquor. Also, tradition has been preserved much more than weddings, which seem like they were crafted around a few snapshots from a western wedding with no underlying idea of the traditions involved or traditions of their own.

[Old fat expat]

One of my worst Korean experiences.

A serious WTF moment.

Apparantly based on the idea that those still living are at fault somehow for the persons death - i.e. didn't do enough to stop the death.

Comfort for the grieving ... NOT. Guilt and punishment is the order of the day(s).

If you are close family for the deceased, it is a grinding, sleep deprived hell.

If you are a casual drop in-I suppose its free beer and food.

[RACETRAITOR]

You forgot about all the money they get.

Although I really hate the anniversary funerals they have every resultant year. One guy my wife went to school with killed his girlfriend and then killed himself, and they still have funerals for the guy every year.

[tzechuk]

In my opinion, both weddings and funerals in this country are a joke.

I mean.. where is the solemnity??? While the family of the dead are grieving, the friends and extended relatives go to a room nearby, drink soju, eat whatever and actually HAVE FUN???

[michaelambling]

None of you people should have ever got a passport.

[Mr Poe]

"None of you people should have ever got a passport."
Fantastic! Exactly what i was thinking.
I've been to many weddings and two funerals, found both to be interestingly different from the ones i've been to at home.

[Panda]

[bogey666]

I suppose it depends on the circumstances and age of the deceased.

if it was a long and fruitful and happy life, I think by all means, what should be celebrated, yes celebrated is that life and how that person made others lives" more fulfilling, interesting, funny or whatever.

I also think that even if the circumstances are 'tragic', if the deceased had left opinions/instructions to friends about how they'd want their death to be remembered... then the deceased's wishes should be respected.

I've only been here about 8 months, but I have LONG ago stopped caring about what Koreans think and about their "culture", because to me it's Martian and will always be Martian in many respects.

that said, if invited or having to be there at a "Korean cultural" event, I'll keep my head down, smile and or nod or bow when necessary and count the minutes till I can get the F out of there and back to the comparative "reality" in the solitude of my appt.


I think in my case, I'll make sure anyone that shows up when I croak, tries to have a good time and parties like it's 1999. It's MY death (just like it was MY life) and it plays out the way "I" want it to, not others, not the society around me and not even my family (which learned very early on I will live MY life exactly how I please, regardless of whether they like it or approve of it, or not).

[jkelly80]

So much of this shit is pointless ceremony, co opted for money and ego (especially weddings)

[bogey666]

[tzechuk]

God, I remember why I've almost stopped posting on Dave's - you just can't post your OWN opinion without being jumped on.. by people who virtually know nothing about your background.

Panda, I am guessing you're Chinese. Well, as am I.

When my great-grandma died, she was 104. We used red lanterns instead of blue.. we burned red candles instead of..uh.. whatever I can't remember. We had a red flower on our head instead of the usual white one.

We were told we had to be happy because she was over 100 and lived a full life. BUT the whole ceremony was still digified, people were not crying, but they didn't come to party.

In Korea, people who go to the funeral, to me, seem like they go there to party. And that's just disrespectful.

But whatever floats their boat, it's their culture. Just don't ask me to go another Korean funeral cos I won't go.

[Faunaki]

It's not disrespectful for people to party at a funeral. It all depends on what the deceased wanted. A good friend of mine passed in Canada and his parents refused to have a sad affair of a funeral. Rather they threw a party where people drank and cried and laughed.

Personally, I like Korean funerals. Canadian funerals are lame. They are like going to church on a regular day but everyone is wearing black and there's a dead body in the room. Sucks.

[Xuanzang]

So Korean funerals are like Irish wakes?

[RACETRAITOR]