Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Adventurer]

Sometimes, I get people asking me my religion. I am not religious, I am spiritual and secular. I respect if people are religious. I don't really put myself in a box. I wanted to know if people consider it rude if someone asks you their religion and you don't know them well.


This fellow was asking me my religion. He's an acquaintance, not a friend. I replied that I am not religious and wanted left at that. I am not religious, I haven't entered a temple of any sort for some years. I do respect various forms of worship and religion, but I don't necessarily feel I would be doing a religious group a favor by saying I affiliate with this or that, because I don't do anything to demonstrate affiliation. Anyway, when I said I am not religious, he asked me if I believe in God? I said I do. He thought also that I am agnostic since I have no religion.

Then, I brought this guy at the cafe into the conversation and said what he thought the term agnostic mean (No, I didn't ask this guy his beliefs).
The guy looked friendly, and the the guy who asked me the question, his girlfriend, who is a colleague at the univ. I work for said why was I bringing this guy into a conversation and asking him about agnostic. I was thinking maybe her bf shouldn't asked me all these questions.

Back to top

[On the other hand]

I would say that, at least in the west, it's CONSIDERED rude to ask people about their religion. And I think that's basically the same thing as saying that it IS rude, since what's rude and not rude is determined by social convention.

That said, I do enjoy discussing religion with people, and I'm always curious about their beliefs. But I can understand why religion is a taboo topic in casual conversation, given that, at least in the west, we have a whole history of sectarian conflict and strife, starting in Europe and continuing all the way into 20th Century North America, and possibly beyond.

The Religious Riots of Philadelphia, 1844

The Manitoba School Question

The 1928 American Presidential Election

As well, on a more personal level, there's always the worry that your interrogator is asking you about your religion as a prelude to converting you to his, which can be a very tedious experience for people whose religious beliefs are long settled.

These days, I don't know a lot of people who are firmly religious. So I discuss religion mostly on a particular message board dedicated to that topic, plus with a few of my more broad-minded Christian friends back home in Canada. I also enjoy chatting with the Mormon missionaries who come to Korea, sometimes about their religion, but also about their experiences in Korea etc.

[On the other hand]

One interesting thing I've noticed is that, among Koreans I talk to, the taboo against discussion religion is something they're not really familar with. Several times I've asked my students if it's rude to ask about religious beliefs in Korea, and they usually reply that it's not.

Possibly this has something to do with the general absence of western-style sectarian strife in Korea, which in turn relates to the absence of a religious-based "caste system", such as outlined in my linked articles. As well, I've heard it argued that the comparative tranquility of sectarian relations over here is linked to Confucianism: ie. it doesn't matter if your senior is a Buddhist and hence going to hell according to your Bible. He's STILL your senior and you have to respect him for that alone.

Plus, the overarching hypernationalism over here probably plays a big role in keeping religious conflict at a low simmer.

[asams]

I enjoy discussing religion, also. However, when someone asks about my religion I reply that it's complicated and for me to explain it would probably take days, and at the end of my explanation I would probably change my views a bit. The more I live and learn the more I believe there is some sort of force that dictates the flow of the universe. Call that force God, Allah, deceased ancestors, whatever, but that's what I believe. With that being said, most of my study is of the Bible so I tend to lean toward Christianity but I'm not entirely sure I agree with everything in the Bible and I don't believe I would call the Bible inerrant and infallible.

Guess I gave a brief idea of my beliefs, but there's plenty more I guarantee. Anyway, I wouldn't necessarily say it's rude but it is a complicated question and one that mere acquaintances should steer clear of. Koreans differ in that they ask very personal questions when they first get to know you, whereas westerners questions are more superficial and less intrusive.

[Adventurer]

I wasn't speaking about Korea particularly, because I've dealt with people in the US asking me what my religion without knowing me very well.
I am in the US right now, and one fellow asked me my religion, and I tried to be evasive and said I am not religious, and then he asked me if I believed in God. He was from a very large Latin American country.. A personal from Southern Europe also asked me that question, and also I had that from an Anglo-American woman. She assumed my beliefs based on something I did and said, "I assume you must be because..."
I politely said I don't differentiate people based on sectarian affiliation or ask.

Two of them later apologized for asking that question when I basically indicated it wasn't appropriate to ask that kind of question. I have been guilty of this same thing long ago in the past when I was a lot younger and didn't know better. I just think it's something you don't ask like you don't ask someone their salary unless you are both colleagues of some sort, and he or she seems okay with sharing the info.


I do believe in a higher power, but I don't see a point in going around saying I am this or that religious club member so long as I am not worshipping or attending any services of some kind.
As a poster brought up, for me differentiating based on religion led to the deaths of so many people in Europe and the Middle East and also Latin America.

I suppose I could humorously answer that I am a Liberal or a Democrat to make a point or say my nationality. What's the best way to humorously to get people to understand that it's not something you wanna have probed.

[On the other hand]

Adventurer wrote:

[Gibberish]

I think everyone should just answer it Daniel Plainview style. "Well... uh.. well I enjoy all faiths!"

What a great way to dodge the question.

[Adventurer]

Yes, you could say I am a theist/deist. I do believe that a strict empiricist can ask the question "Who created God", but one can still go back to the question, "Who created the universe". The idea that it simply came on its own is difficult to fathom. However, I do not believe in focusing on dividing people from the nations of the world based on how they may differ from me based on confessional upbringing or affiliation. I also am cognizant of the fact that our ancient ancestors believed in something different, and I am not sure what makes believing in another religious persuasion better than them per se.

I think sometimes we want to put people so readily into categories. Yes, the asking about someone's salary is not the same as asking the private question regarding religious affiliation. It's more universally considered rude to ask a question regarding salary unless there is a certain context where it's made okay.

With religion, still like salary, it's one of those taboo subjects. We have separation between church-and-state in our countries because of the danger of one religious group trying to impose its will on others, which should also translate in not wanting to get into the privacy of others when it pertains to confessional differences?

I like that quote "I have a firm position about not talking about religion unless I am getting naked with that person". I wouldn't use that, personally, but I thought that it's funny.

[Adventurer]

[Draz]

It's rude to ask, sometimes I want to ask about someone's religion (so I can see how well they fit in the mental box I've created for them) but I don't, because it's rude.

I like how easy it is to avoid the whole conversation in Korea though by saying you have "no religion".

[peppermint]

I used to enjoy befuddling Koreans by telling them I was a heathen.
As for the question, I think there are ways to broach the subject inoffensively, but it's tricky to pull off, and about 95% of the time, the person asking just comes off as nosy.

[giraffe]

Yeah, I've been asked if i believe in jesus in my time in korea. Usually the conversation that takes place after that is me explaining why i cant take a book written by men and edited for 2000 years as truth... Then they give me some talk about jesus and love and if i want to teach english at their church... good times..

I dont get religion though. Although im born/raised catholic Its not something i practice and its definitely not part of my life at alll. Never once in my life have i been curious or even bothered asking about someones religion. I just dont care about that stuff.

On that note, I dont think asking about ones religion is rude or nosy at all. Its just a question. Then again it depends what the asker's intentions are.. I do think however its rude to try to sell/pitch your religion to a strangers. Try to recruit people onto your side Now thats annoying.
Usually when that happens i always try to make up funny stories with the mormons that bother me on the bus.

[proustme]

Countless times I've been approached by absolutely gorgeous women...who asked me "Do you believe in the mother of God?"

[tomato]

When I was in South America, I found that people ask that question the minute they first meet.
I'm glad they don't do that here.
Instead, they ask how old are you!

[Adventurer]