Korean Job Discussion Forums

[afsjesse]

The father of one of my teachers at my school just died. I was just asked to contribute 20k won which I gladly did. I remember reading about this the other day on a different thread and wasn't sure what to think of it.

My coteacher said that because I was a foreigner that she felt aukward (sp?) asking me. I didn't mind and feel really bad for the teacher. Knowig that they probably wouldn't do the same for me that isn't the point.

What ya'll think about it?

[jdog2050]

[Whistleblower]

I used to prefer to go to the funeral (which usually lasted 3 days), and give the money directly to the family members. It is a sombre environment and you do have the chance to have some soju and food.

[Joe666]

If that's the cultural norm and every other K-teacher did it. You absolutely did the right thing. Hats off to you!!

[dean_burrito]

[Michael_75]

20,000 well spent in my opinion. Doesn't matter if they wouldn't reciprocate, it's a significant gesture and it can only improve your relationship with the whole teaching staff. And all for a minimal fee.

That sounds a little selfish perhaps...

[roadwork]

That happened at my school but it wasn't a teacher, it was someone in the administrative office. No one asked for donations, but I bought the office a nice blueberry cream roll cake.

[kasain]

I think Jessie is the bomb!!!!! We should all cheer him on for his act of kindness. I hope you have a great weekend.

[afsjesse]

thanks Dan, but no thanks required. Just was wondering what people thought of the custom.

[Ya-ta Boy]

[itaewonguy]

wow your school sounds better than one of my old ones

I had to go to my wife's fathers funeral!
I never used any of my sick days for 3 years at that school. ! always came to work! and helped the boss anyway I could for her..
all the other co teachers use to use their sick days and more..
and were always paid them for them...
not to mention I even recruited the teachers for the school for free as I could and I never asked anything in return...

my wife's father died! I told the boss I need to drive my wife to her hometown and attend the funeral and comfort my wife for a couple days..
she looked shocked as I was going to miss classes! but anyway said ok!

so I went.. next's month pay day I was missing 2 days pay!!

I asked the boss.. why is my pay short??

she said.. because you missed two days work last month for your wife's fathers funeral!!

I was shocked!! then I said, well I have 3 sick days a year.. so I can use them as that..
she said NO!! you were not sick! you went to a funeral! you were not sick!

I looked at her and then reminded her everything I had done for her, and reminded her of more than 5 teachers I recruited for her in the past.. and that all those teachers I recruited for her have taken sick days and were paid!

she looked at me and said! " they were sick you were not sick"

I quit and walked out right there!!

moral of the story folks! don't be kind to Korean people! they will use you , abuse you and never appreciate you.. don't expect anything back in return! this comes from 12 years of helping people...

[afsjesse]

That's typical Hagwon BS right there. Even if every Korean were to be that way, I would still treat them with kindness/respect (most of the time) just to show them the otherside of the coin in hopes that it would get someone thinking. I have met some very generous people in Korea who would do almost anything for me. I have also met the most cynical and rude also.

In the end I'm a firm believer that you get what you give. Call it karma or just good manners, it's the right thing to do.

J.

[Robot_Teacher]

I got 7 special days of paid leave in my contract in the event I need to go to a funeral.

[bundangbabo]

About 2 months ago - I saw a whip round going on in the office and I asked my co-teacher what was going on and she told me about one of the older male teachers whose mother in law died that weekend. I said I would like to contribute and she started to umm and ahhh and I just put my foot down - the chap is a jovial sort and I kind of liked him - I said if there was a whip round going on, as a member of staff I would like to contribute - my co-teacher asked the lady organizing the whip round and she agreed. It was only 20,000 won but everytime I see the teacher now he is really friendly and nice - because word gets round that the waygook teacher has put his hand in his pocket - when I asked why they have never asked me for a donation before, both my English co-teachers have said that when a native English teacher has been asked to contribute previously - they have always kicked up a big fuss about it - so thank the tight fisted knobbers who proceeded us!

So, two female teachers are getting married this Sunday (both on the same day but at different venues) again - I said to my co-teacher 'if there is a whip round - I want to contribute' and she was like 'oooh - you don't have to' and I said 'Listen, I am putting in if everyone else is also - don't worry about it - I can afford it' so I went to E-Mart and saw the cost of an iron (around 50,000 won) so last Monday I came in with 100,000 won, 50,000 won for each teacher getting married - at least they can buy themselves an iron if nothing else - my co-teacher nearly fell off her chair and said it was too much - after a fair bit of going back and forth - she said 30,000 won each was enough and we agreed on that amount though I wasn't happy about it!

Am I doing it for selfish reasons? Maybe - you know - when I leave and they want to slag off the waygook - they'll be doing it with bad conciense - I hope they can see with my small offerings that I am a human like them and if they are to celebrate something or are in trouble - I will help them like I would help anyone I know. I like to think that after nearly a year - that I can give whatever I can and hope it would be appreciated a little - they don't have to say thank you or make a big deal about it but if they ever think of me in the future - they can think 'bundangbabo was an all right bloke'

[itaewonguy]