Korean Job Discussion Forums

big_fella1 · Joined: 08 Dec 2005

Just a quick question to the F2's who controls the finances in your family?

I have thus far retained control of the finances, I am able to pay all our bills using Internet Banking and I budget 'pocket money' for both my wife and myself.

Am I being a bad husband? Am I making my life more difficult? Am I culturally insensitive?

andrewchon · Posted: Sat Sep 19, 2009 6:02 pm Post subject:

Korean tradition is husband works and hands over the pay-packet to wife.
You don't have to follow the tradition,but your wife maybe suffering silently because she can't hold up her head during ajumma gatherings.

meangradin · Joined: 10 Mar 2006

By the tone of your post, you seem aware that in Korea it's traditionally the wife's job to control the finances. But whatever works for you and your wife is cool. I teach a Senior VP of a major Korean corporation and his wife controls all their money.

I know some will say that it is suicide to let your K'n wife control the money, blah blah blah. Personally speaking, if I didn't trust my wife 100%, I wouldn't have married her.

Changwon Charlie · Joined: 22 Aug 2009 Location: Changwon

We both work and make nice money so "pocket money" has never been a concern.

Basically we give each other 700K a month spending money (ie. lunches, drinks, clothes,etc) and when we go out for dinner we credit card it.

We have put 5 million won into an account for emergencies and basically bank and invest the rest (about 6 million a month in the various investments)

Of course there are exceptions (like birthdays, vacations, special occasions) and sometimes I need a top-up but we both have full access to all accounts and it works very well.

Never had a problem.

redaxe · Joined: 01 Dec 2008

Keep control of those purse strings as long as you can, my friend. Trust me on this one.

NightSky · Joined: 19 Apr 2005

hellofaniceguy · Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Location: On your computer screen!

cornholio1 · Joined: 26 Apr 2007 Location: Bupyeong

I let my wife control it all and I have to say it's not great. I need to hide some from her to save it. I make a good deal of money on my own, the wife stays home and watches our 2 year old. She seems to find uses for everybit of my seven mill a month. I teach some privates on the side and I squirrel about half of that away everytime. Luckily my morning job is a bit dodgy on the paydates so I tell her that I only got half a paycheck and save the rest. korean women, like American women love to spend money, hold on, I think everywoman likes to spend money. So there's no question about racism. It's how you handle it yourself. Korean women in general will be a bit miffed if you don't try to follow the korean tradition. You know what they say"When in Rome." but for the op, I make a lot of money and have an f-2 with a child half-half and still can't get a credit card. how did you get yours?

exit86 · Joined: 17 May 2006

I would also advise new husbands to take care of the main finances yourself. My wife and I both work; I pay all the bills when they come in;
and, I pay for vacations. Why does the wife need to do anything in this type of situation, besides the silly "supposed to" excuse?
I'm a big boy, and I've lived on my own far longer than my wife has; therefore, I have far more experience and am the more qualified individual to take care of such things.
Problem solved.

Mr. Pink · Joined: 21 Oct 2003 Location: China

I've controlled the money for about the past 5-6 years. My wife did a bit of a bad job of it early on, so I had to take control of it. I think whoever takes better control should be the one to keep up with it.

bassexpander · Joined: 13 Sep 2007 Location: Someplace you'd rather be.

Currently, it's a shared thing, but she makes more money than me.

If she were ever to quit work, I'd probably let her do it.

Andrewchon was right... the other ajumma will chide your wife about it if they find out. We never had problems with this arrangement until some coworkers started telling my wife that if she didn't control the money, then I may as well be her roommate.

Real Reality · Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Location: Seoul

big_fella1 · Joined: 08 Dec 2005

winterwawa · Joined: 06 May 2007

I bought into the k-wife holding the money when I was married. I was married and now divorced from 2 K-wives. I also wanted to be a good husband. Total loss, 80,000,000 won. Yes, that's right, I said 80 million. And that is just the cash that I know about. Also lost a car, a house full of furniture and lots of personal stuff.

My vote, let her squirm at the ajumma gatherings.

meangradin · Joined: 10 Mar 2006

I hesitate to believe that I'm the only guy on this forum who has a wife that actually makes and saves money. My wife is, well, for lack of a better term, frugal. Hell, she forbid me from buying a diamond ring for her as she wanted us to put our money in to an apartment, which we were able to buy cash. Plus, she is the one that finds out about all the investment opportunities at local banks that I have no way of knowing about. We just started one plan with a bank where we invest 64 million over 8 years and get 30 million back in interest, plus the principle.