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there's no explaining this...
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mr.bojangles



Joined: 06 Feb 2004

PostPosted: Sat Feb 28, 2004 11:34 pm    Post subject: there's no explaining this... Reply with quote

Does anyone else experience this? I've been in Seoul for about 6 months now, and the time has been pretty up and down. I feel like I often want to explain what I'm going through, the bizarre and unhealthy working environment, the stares and sidelong glances on the subway, the seemingly thorough lack of cause-and-effect logic, and the eery hypocrisy exhibited by koreans whenever they are questioned about pollution, drugs, homosexuality, America, Japan, etc. Shocked
Don't get me wrong, I also spend a lot of my time admiring parts of the culture and the people, and trying to put things in the perspective of war and colonization and simple cultural differences. So, in short, I'm trying to keep a balanced perspective. But whenever I try to explain the stranger parts of Korea to my folks or friends back home they just tell me that it's different and imply that maybe I'm being a bit racist.
Even in my worst moments, I would never consider myself a racist, not because the title isn't a flattering one, but because I believe that there is a difference between being deeply frustrated or annoyed, and having an actual, rooted hatred for a people. What's funny is that it's only here (on these forums) where I can see that it's not just me- almost everyone feels this way! So my question is: does anyone else find it next-to-impossible to even begin to explain life in Korea to people back home? Some reassurance would be much appreciated...
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just because



Joined: 01 Aug 2003
Location: Changwon - 4964

PostPosted: Sat Feb 28, 2004 11:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

mr.bojangles wrote:
So my question is: does anyone else find it next-to-impossible to even begin to explain life in Korea to people back home?


Yes. Smile
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Alex Buffa



Joined: 31 Jan 2003
Location: South Korea

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 12:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cities and countries are representative of the values of those individuals within their society.

If their cities are dirty, poor and poorly made it symbolizes an unadvanced society that does not consider health an important issue.

The fact that they are leaving in droves to goto more "advanced" countries may suggest that Koreans are unable to make their country succeed. So the few that can, get out.

I've always said that you make the bed you lie in...if that bed is noisy, polluted, dirty and surrounded by undrinkable water in your pipes..you have no one to blame but yourself. The Americans had NOTHING to do with it.

(they haven't figured that out in the last 50 years... and still can't drink the tap water)
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in_seoul_2003



Joined: 24 Nov 2003

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 3:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

...

Last edited by in_seoul_2003 on Fri Mar 05, 2004 5:06 am; edited 1 time in total
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Bubbliee



Joined: 03 Jul 2003
Location: Kelowna, BC Canada

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 4:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mr. Bojagles I so much know what you are talking about. I don't so much get accused of being racist, just of hating Korea. I don't hate Korea. Anytime I make a comparison between Korea and home about anything I get told that I should never say I hate Korea. I don't know what it is, why people assume that I hate korea, because I certainly don't.
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Derrek



Joined: 15 Jan 2003

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 5:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dude, I've had a bad week.

I try to get on the bus to Bundang in the evenings, and it sickens me to see people of all ages jogging and pushing each other with this #(*(#($-grins on their faces as they fight to be "first" so they can possibly get a seat. No one wants to stand, so they fight to be first in line. Same problem on the subway when you go from the Yellow line to the Orange line.

On Friday, an ajumma sprinted, pushed, and jumped in front of me to get on the bus first, and it was all I could do to keep from pushing her off into the street.

Some days, I just want to kick the living heck out of a Korean who rubs me the wrong way -- make him a martar for all of the crap I've been through here. Obviously, I don't, but scene's of what I'd like to do in given situations run through my mind all of the time.

I had to force myself to take a step back and think about every nice person that I've encountered in Korea just to cool off.

It's been a bad week for me, too.
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desultude



Joined: 15 Jan 2003
Location: Dangling my toes in the Persian Gulf

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 5:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Three weeks ago I was on the subway with a friend. We were on the way to the airport, so we had big bags and packs. My friend is a 30 year old, healthy woman. I'm not so young. We were standing on the crowded rush hour train. My friend looked miserable- upset stomach, a bit too much travel and too much to carry.

This ajuma, who had to be at least 60, looked at my friend, stood up and gave her the seat. She refused to sit back down. The seat was for my friend and there was no argument (as there is no arguing with ajuma.) I actually appreciate the hell out of ajuma. They do push, but they also take your bags and carry them on their laps, on busses. They are always trying to help (like it or not.) They are take charge people. They sure aren't your American grandma!
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peppermint



Joined: 13 May 2003
Location: traversing the minefields of caddishness.

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 5:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

desultude wrote:
I actually appreciate the hell out of ajuma. They do push, but they also take your bags and carry them on their laps, on busses. They are always trying to help (like it or not.) They are take charge people. They sure aren't your American grandma!


Technically "ajuma" refers to a woman between say 30 and 50, so they shouldn't be like a grandma, anyway. I tell my students that if they want to see North American "ajuma" they should go and watch a sale at a big department store- particularly after Christmas. Wink

I agree though, they can be very, very kind, and are consistently among my favorite students in adult classes, because they tend to be free of the conventions that apply to younger women here.
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ajuma



Joined: 18 Feb 2003
Location: Anywere but Seoul!!

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 7:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree with "just because". It's IMPOSSIBLE to explain "Korean style" to the folks back home. The FUNNIEST question that I was asked by a relative was "Are there many cars there?"
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The Hammer



Joined: 18 Jan 2003
Location: Ullungdo 37.5 N, 130.9 E, altitude : 223 m

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 10:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

desultude wrote:
...They sure aren't your American grandma!


Hmmm... American Grandma... I remember her.

Gentle smile, kind heart, bakes cookies, pies, and cakes. I love her!

'nuff said.

The Hammer
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Ya-ta Boy



Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: Established in 1994

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 3:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I don't think I've ever succeeded in describing life here in Korea. In my opinion, it would take a world class writer/film maker to do it. Us regular folk just don't have the talent for choosing the right examples and then describing them right.
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djsmnc



Joined: 20 Jan 2003
Location: Dave's ESL Cafe

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 8:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

In my hip and modern hometown, full of people who consider themselves to be all-knowing gurus on every facet of life, I've heard all types of intelligent questions from adults...

Let's see,

"How can you live there without any Western food? I'd need a hamburger every once in awhile..."

"Do they even drink alcohol there?"

"They all speak Chinese there, right?"

"They don't have phones and tv's there yet, do they? How will you call home?

I even had a girl, a UNIVERSITY SENIOR (this one's the kicker), upon finding out I could speak a few words in Korean, say:

"Man, he's talented! He can speak other languages! He even speaks Hong Kong!!"
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Kwangjuchicken



Joined: 01 Sep 2003
Location: I was abducted by aliens on my way to Korea and forced to be an EFL teacher on this crazy planet.

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 8:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

just because wrote:
mr.bojangles wrote:
So my question is: does anyone else find it next-to-impossible to even begin to explain life in Korea to people back home?


Yes. Smile



Dear friend back in Ohio,

Well, Korea, it is like, well, I I, Crying or Very sad I mean, well, it is sort of like, no, not really, but more or less, let's see, how should I put it? Well, you know. Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad
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Tiger Beer



Joined: 07 Feb 2003

PostPosted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 11:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I usually describe Korea like this:

Well, they have really cheap internet cafes all over the place.. probably a dozen in your view at all times wherever you go.

They also have cellphones with cameras on them.. and everyone takes pictures of themselves before and after every meal. Its also obligatory to send a text message before meals to let your other friends know you are indeed eating and doing alright.
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mr.bojangles



Joined: 06 Feb 2004

PostPosted: Mon Mar 01, 2004 4:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

oh, how i love you all!
here i was thinking i was this horrible person ..it's so frustrating to go through the ups and downs here and just not be able to explain ANYTHING to people back home. and hell, it's not like i don't try. my poor folks, every time they call me to see what's up, they get an earful of the latest random crap that's happening here.
incidentally, did anyone know about the holiday today (mar.1st) ? i think it is the day that korea got independence from japan...think this would be a big thing, right? but none of the teachers at my school even bothered to tell me. and it's not like i don't show an interest in Korean culture- i've gone to plenty of temples and palaces around seoul, and have read a ton on the internet, talked with lots of koreans about their culture, and tend to know about as much as the teachers at my school about the basic history and stats...but still, despite these facts, they tell me s#it all about what goes on here! i can think of only 2 reasons that this would happen:
1) they don't know and/or don't care much about it, just like we don't do "tourist-y" things in our home countries...or they think i don't care (despite clear signs of the contrary), or,
2) they're protectionists about their culture and think that while it's okay that they borrow liberally from american and japanese culture, don't want to give up any of their own...it's like the "you show me yours and i'll..oh, wait, no i wont."
hmmm...
any thoughts?
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