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What kind of friend would do that? |
A great friend needn't feel obliged to say anything positive, was honest |
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16% |
[ 5 ] |
A good friend might have been having a bad day and friends should have thick skins |
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19% |
[ 6 ] |
A friend perhaps but a *beep* thing to do. He was a bit insensitive. |
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19% |
[ 6 ] |
No real friend would disregard one's feelings like that, except in the rarest of cases. |
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12% |
[ 4 ] |
A bad friend indeed is one who *beep* on one's happiness for whatever petty self-absorbed reason. |
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6% |
[ 2 ] |
*shrug* |
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25% |
[ 8 ] |
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Total Votes : 31 |
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VanIslander

Joined: 18 Aug 2003 Location: Geoje, Hadong, Tongyeong,... now in a small coastal island town outside Gyeongsangnamdo!
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 7:46 am Post subject: How good of a friend is this? |
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I met a 30 year old woman I really like, told my friend of five years about her, how she is the first one I have liked in a long time, told him her age, how I haven't gone to first base yet but had two dates and like her and eagerly showed him three pictures of her and I together taken on the first two dates... and what does my friend do.... he pauses... says nothing... then a minute later I take the pictures away and then he says - all he says on the matter - and his words exactly as they scorched into my consciousness:"She's got some bags under her eyes. What's up with that?"
(I say it's because she works long hours at her job six days a week and I change the subject of conversation.) |
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Tundra_Creature
Joined: 11 Jun 2009 Location: Canada
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 8:19 am Post subject: |
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A friend, but that was a dick answer. And if he's never met a girl with bags under her eyes, then wow. Wtf.
Anyway, whatever. he's not the one that digs the girl, you are. |
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yingwenlaoshi

Joined: 12 Feb 2007 Location: ... location, location!
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 8:19 am Post subject: |
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How big were the bags? Were they big, bulky, bulging, behemoth-sized, brown-colored bags? |
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mc_jc

Joined: 13 Aug 2009 Location: C4B- Cp Red Cloud, Area-I
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 8:55 am Post subject: |
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I have to admit, it was a dick answer, but an honest one. |
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Koveras
Joined: 09 Oct 2008
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 11:44 am Post subject: |
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If you'd been seeing this woman longer, a few months say, and you felt that way, he'd be a shitty friend for saying that and not being glad for you. But you've only been out with her twice. That's why I think in this case he was just blunt, perhaps even accidentally. You can understand why in other peoples' eyes your 'relationship' might seem less than serious. |
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peppermint

Joined: 13 May 2003 Location: traversing the minefields of caddishness.
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 11:46 am Post subject: |
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I'm guessing your friend is just Korean and used to the heavy photoshopping they do to most pictures there. |
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VanIslander

Joined: 18 Aug 2003 Location: Geoje, Hadong, Tongyeong,... now in a small coastal island town outside Gyeongsangnamdo!
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 2:40 pm Post subject: |
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So far one vote for each option. You guys are as split about it as I am!
peppermint wrote: |
I'm guessing your friend is just Korean and used to the heavy photoshopping they do to most pictures there. |
Nobody in this story is Korean. |
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Draz

Joined: 27 Jun 2007 Location: Land of Morning Clam
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 2:56 pm Post subject: |
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It means he wanted to say something else, but was too polite, so he had to come up with something, anything, on the spot. Whatever he was thinking was worse than what he said. |
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rusty1983
Joined: 30 Jan 2007
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 3:41 pm Post subject: |
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That's comedy genius there keep hold of him, well funny. If I were you Id have cracked up. |
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andrewchon

Joined: 16 Nov 2008 Location: Back in Oz. Living in ISIS Aust.
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 4:12 pm Post subject: |
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Dunno, since when is a buddy happy about losing his bum chum to a chick?
He's expressing his sorrow. |
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Fox

Joined: 04 Mar 2009
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 6:54 pm Post subject: |
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When you've been with a woman for an extended period of time, it's reasonable to expect your friends to minimize needless criticism of her. When you are first getting to know a woman, though, I think it's not just reasonable but valuable for your friends to focus on their flaws. |
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JMO

Joined: 18 Jul 2006 Location: Daegu
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 7:00 pm Post subject: |
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Draz wrote: |
It means he wanted to say something else, but was too polite, so he had to come up with something, anything, on the spot. Whatever he was thinking was worse than what he said. |
Bingo. I have a friend who pauses and says "she's cute". I know what that actually means. |
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climber159

Joined: 02 Sep 2007
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 7:03 pm Post subject: |
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Why do you care what anyone else thinks? If you like her, then continue in the direction you're going. |
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UknowsI

Joined: 16 Apr 2009
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 7:19 pm Post subject: |
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I think it's an insensitive answer from your friend, but I think it says more about his social skills than the friendship.
If you asked him what she thinks she looks like, then I think it's just an honest answer. But if he made the comment without you asking for his opinion of her looks, then it was a poor choice of words from his side. |
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eamo

Joined: 08 Mar 2003 Location: Shepherd's Bush, 1964.
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 7:21 pm Post subject: |
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Sounds like a minor throwaway comment that you shouldn't get upset about. |
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