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whome?
Joined: 13 Nov 2009
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 8:17 am Post subject: resume class--- Kim Jong Il's resume |
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Can anyone think of other fun things to add to this? I'm especially looking for something interesting to put in the 'skills' section.
KIM JONG-IL
Phone: 010-6666-9999 E-Mail: [email protected]
EDUCATION
Korea University Bachelor of Arts in Modern Dance and English Education (Completed 2010)
Courses on bootylicious dance technique, wiggle it just a little bit, and interpretive dance. Also took courses in language acquisition theory and syntax.
AWARDS:
North Korean Award for most hole in ones in a round of golf, Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the field of excellence, First class award in weather-mood control.
CURRENT
Mar 2006 � Feb 2010 STUDENT, KOREA UNIVERSITY, SEOUL, KOREA
� Majored in modern dance and English Education. Achieved a GPA of a perfect 4.0 and finished first in my class.
TEACHING AND DANCING EXPERIENCE
Jan 2009 � Present ESL TEACHER, Slave Labour Program HAGWON
� I teach classes on English grammar, spelling and vocabulary. I manage attendance records and parent-hagwon relations.
Aug 2007 � Dec 2008 ENGLISH TUTOR
� I tutored students aged 5-16 in English grammar. I often applied the Chomskyan perspective to Second Language Acquisition with these students
Oct 2003 � May 2005 MODERN DANCE INSTRUCTOR, SPICY PYONGYANG DANCE STUDIO
� I taught modern and classic dance to students of all ages.
� Certified to teach: The Chicken Dance, The Macarena, The Moonwalk, The Time Warp, and the YMCA
SKILLS SUMMARY
Communications Experienced in using English and Korean in the work environment. Also experience in 'dealing' with the public. Well versed in threats and intimidation.
Technical Proficient in MS Office.
Extensive experience with ESL teaching software.
Programming language include: Java, Visual Basic and C++
References Available Upon Request |
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vaticanhotline
Joined: 18 Jun 2009 Location: in the most decent sometimes sun
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 5:41 pm Post subject: |
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I don't know if you should be going down this road dude; I mean, the K's get kind of defensive any time I mention the North. The sense of humour is different here; irony isn't a big thing at all.
On the other hand, if you're happy enough to go with it, you could mention something about Kim being a movie critic, presenting the NK Oscars, that kind of thing. Did you know that he kidnapped the Asian Steven Spielberg a few years back, in order to make a movie? |
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IlIlNine
Joined: 15 Jun 2005 Location: Gunpo, Gyonggi, SoKo
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 5:48 pm Post subject: |
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This really won't go over well. Make fun of 2MB instead. |
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jvalmer

Joined: 06 Jun 2003
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 6:15 pm Post subject: |
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- 20 years in a leadership role.
- Directed foreign operations. |
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hobakmorinam
Joined: 22 Dec 2008
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 6:55 pm Post subject: |
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Seriously, don't do this. |
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whome?
Joined: 13 Nov 2009
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 7:52 pm Post subject: |
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It;s already done and it's gone over just fine.
Man people are sensitive...
I'm looking for refinements and ways to make it better. |
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Kaypea
Joined: 09 Oct 2008
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 8:13 pm Post subject: |
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If you're sure it went over fine, go with it!
If anything, I would do a few minutes research and substitute some of the joke qualifications with his real ones, which are funny enough.
Like the other poster mentioned, there is the time he kidnapped a famous S Korean director (Shin Sang-ok) AND his ex-wife, actress Choi Eun-hee.
So, you could do something like this
FILM PRODUCER, 1976- Present
As well as producing hundreds of brilliant films, one or two of which have won minor awards at Communism's finest film festivals (back before the tragic fall of the iron curtain), Kim Jong Il as also managed to recruit the finest of cinematic talent from the Korean Pensinsula... |
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whome?
Joined: 13 Nov 2009
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2009 9:41 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks, Kaypea. That's a good idea.
I'm also thinking for the skills section I will be including 'ability to walk in platform shoes.' |
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Kaypea
Joined: 09 Oct 2008
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Posted: Mon Nov 30, 2009 3:09 am Post subject: |
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Yes, he has that runway walk!
He also modernized hairstyles in North Korea with his disco Stu bouffant. Maybe we can say that the man-perm is the DPRK's main contribution to life on the peninsula.
And, he was a fashion designer, too. He revamped the DPRK uniform.
And, he encouraged girls and women to wear more make-up, so I guess you could put aesthetician or Commander of Fierceness on the list. I'm reading a book on the man right now... |
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