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Blockhead confidence
Joined: 02 Apr 2008
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 Posted: Sat Feb 20, 2010 3:34 pm Post subject: Chinese layfolks' arguments against democracy |
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Anyone interested in this? It's a translation done by Chinageeks from the Chinese website Anti-CNN. Anti-CNN was set up by Chinese netizens during the protests in Tibet and Xinjiang.
| Anti-CNN wrote: |
First item: This egg tastes great, because it is a democratic egg.
Second item: All democratic eggs taste good, there is no such thing as a bad-tasting democratic egg.
Third item: Undemocratic eggs are definitely disgusting, because they are undemocratic eggs.
A: This egg tastes great.
B: Why does it taste so good?
A: Because it is a democratic egg.
B: Democratic eggs are definitely good?
A: Of course! Please see the second item [above].
B: So how is it that the eggs of democratic India taste bad?
A: Well�you�re making a messy comparison there.
B: But India�s eggs really do taste bad.
A: I�ve already told you, please see the second item: All democratic eggs taste good, there is no such thing as a bad-tasting democratic egg. Even if it did taste bad you can�t say it tastes bad, making comparisons with India is messy, you should make comparisons with America, remember political correctness.
B: So democratic American eggs definitely taste good?
A: Of course! Because they�re democratic eggs.
B: But democratic America also has some bad tasting eggs.
A: Please refer to the second item [above].
B: I think Chinese eggs also taste good.
A: Please look at the third item [above], undemocratic eggs definitely taste disgusting, and even if they taste good you can�t say they taste good, please remember political correctness.
B: So what must Chinese eggs do to become good?
A: Become democratic.
B: And what is �democratic�?
A: Democracy is one-man-one-vote elections, separation of powers, the right to own guns, etc.
B: If there were elections, would everyone choose you to be the president or a legislator?
A: Well�hmph! I don�t have that much money, and I don�t have a grip on public opinion, so they can only choose someone else. Whoever has the most money, the most speeches, the most honors, and the fewest scandals will be elected.
B: So do you understand the person you want to elect?
A: For that all you have to do is watch the media.
B: Who is qualified to be a candidate?
A: That�s not for me to worry about, those capitalists and financial groups will pick two candidates and the public will select one of them.
B: So you�re saying you can only choose your own boss from the representative agents chosen by financial groups. How is that democracy? It�s clearly just choosing your own emperor.
A: #$#@%
B: Those three items you said are definitely correct?
A: Yes of course, I learned this in America, the media is always howling about democracy, people are always talking about democracy, and the internet is also influenced. There is no need to doubt the correctness of those three items, if anyone raises doubts about their correctness then they are anti-democracy. |
In case it's not clear, this is a parody of those who argue for democracy on Chinese message boards.
Last edited by Blockhead confidence on Sat Feb 20, 2010 10:05 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Street Magic
Joined: 23 Sep 2009
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| Posted: Sat Feb 20, 2010 6:48 pm Post subject: |
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I will send $5000 to anyone who can find the word "democracy" written anywhere in the US Constitution.
Also, what does the right to bear arms or the separation of powers have to do with democracy? I know they can technically claim anything wildly inaccurate written in that exchange was just meant to parody other people, but I somehow doubt there are a bunch of Americans going around citing "democracy" as the reason for the 2nd Amendment or the judicial, legislative, and executive branches.
And what was the point of the egg metaphor when they just talked about literal policies anyway? Had they simply replaced "egg" with "government," "tastes good" with "is effective," and "tastes bad" with "is ineffective," they'd have been left with an entirely metaphor-less discussion. What they did is akin to if I started this criticism by calling their discussion a car only to insert two or three non sequitor instances of "the car broke down" into the text I already have written.
PS: Most confusing of all, what does "political correctness" have to do with advocating democracy or denouncing China? It's a phrase used for how to properly refer to disabled people and minorities. |
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Blockhead confidence
Joined: 02 Apr 2008
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| Posted: Sat Feb 20, 2010 10:21 pm Post subject: |
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| Street Magic wrote: |
I will send $5000 to anyone who can find the word "democracy" written anywhere in the US Constitution.
Also, what does the right to bear arms or the separation of powers have to do with democracy? I know they can technically claim anything wildly inaccurate written in that exchange was just meant to parody other people, but I somehow doubt there are a bunch of Americans going around citing "democracy" as the reason for the 2nd Amendment or the judicial, legislative, and executive branches.
And what was the point of the egg metaphor when they just talked about literal policies anyway? Had they simply replaced "egg" with "government," "tastes good" with "is effective," and "tastes bad" with "is ineffective," they'd have been left with an entirely metaphor-less discussion. What they did is akin to if I started this criticism by calling their discussion a car only to insert two or three non sequitor instances of "the car broke down" into the text I already have written.
PS: Most confusing of all, what does "political correctness" have to do with advocating democracy or denouncing China? It's a phrase used for how to properly refer to disabled people and minorities. |
[Background info] The egg metaphor: sorry this piece was actually a response to another which parodied those who log on to Chinese message boards just to (attempt to) refute any negative comments about the Chinese government. These people are called '50cent police' because of the supposed fee paid to them for posting such comments. The original is here, if you want to read it.
Don't take it too seriously. It's just bozos like us posting, not the Communist Party. A lot of what is written is just them imagining what China might look like as a democracy, supposing the right to bear arms having something to do with this. |
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