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| If you had to choose... |
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| cat |
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| Total Votes : 82 |
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piratebryan
Joined: 21 Feb 2008
Location: Nonyeon
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 Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 4:03 am Post subject: Her or the cat... |
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Long story short...been dating this girl for the last 8 months. She's awesome and everything is usually great. I have a cat, which she's always sort of disliked. Every few months, we get into it and one of the problems she has is this cat. I'm an animal lover through and through. Today she told me it was her or the cat, she has a phobia of animals and she's fed up. Granted, I could have done somethings differently and been better all around....
But Jesus...taking it out on a man's cat?
I've had this cat for over two years and it does annoy me quite a bit sometimes...but come on, the cat is family. Things could have probably worked out around the cat, but the situation is such that I think its just best to end it...
Anyone else ever had to make a such a choice? |
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Louis VI
Joined: 05 Jul 2010
Location: In my Kingdom
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 4:08 am Post subject: Re: Her or the cat... |
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| piratebryan wrote: |
| I'm an animal lover through and through... the cat is family. |
Then you know what has to be done: turf the girlfriend. You will be MUCH happier finding yourself a gal who at least moderately likes animals.
Note: There might be relationship power dynamics at play and if you put your foot down and draw the line at the cat, the girlfriend might realize she has to accept the pet. YOU don't need to break up with the girlfriend, make it her decision: accept your cat and you go together. It's a package deal. Accept both or neither. |
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Globutron
Joined: 13 Feb 2010
Location: England/Anyang
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 4:12 am Post subject: |
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| Compromise, tell her to get rid of something she dearly treasures. |
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ED209
Joined: 17 Oct 2006
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 4:16 am Post subject: |
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| Globutron wrote: |
| Compromise, tell her to get rid of something she dearly treasures. |
Her family |
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Globutron
Joined: 13 Feb 2010
Location: England/Anyang
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 4:18 am Post subject: |
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| ED209 wrote: |
| Globutron wrote: |
| Compromise, tell her to get rid of something she dearly treasures. |
Her family |
Or her family cat. |
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BoholDiver
Joined: 03 Oct 2009
Location: Canada
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 4:38 am Post subject: |
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Hmmm...which *beep* to choose?
I choose the one that pleasures me. The girlfriend. |
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Vagabundo
Joined: 26 Aug 2010
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:00 am Post subject: |
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| This is easy. Lots of fish in the sea. Not nearly as many cool and beloved cats. I'll take my kitty over her kitty, unless hers is made of gold, which it clearly isn't. It's like every other kitty everywhere else. |
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Radius
Joined: 20 Dec 2009
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:02 am Post subject: |
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| Vagabundo wrote: |
| This is easy. Lots of fish in the sea. Not nearly as many cool and beloved cats. I'll take my kitty over her kitty, unless hers is made of gold, which it clearly isn't. It's like every other kitty everywhere else. |
that is true. is your cat AWESOME? does it love to pet and give you a lot of satifaction? I voted GF, but thats because i actually would choose my gf over this lame cat/kitten i have. dumb thing hates being pet and bites me whenever i try. |
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conrad2
Joined: 05 Nov 2009
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:03 am Post subject: |
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| It all depends on how easy it will be for you to find a new woman. Oh and also is she hot? That will factor in greatly. |
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RMNC
Joined: 21 Jul 2010
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:03 am Post subject: |
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Tough call. The cat will love you unconditionally, but she can love you in ways a cat never could (or shouldn't, yikes). But I guess it's weird for someone to have a phobia of animals.
I voted cat, but I'm suggesting a counter-ultimatum, that she either grows up and learns to deal with things like a big girl or you'll dump her. You gotta put it on her, since it's not your problem. You'll be forcing her to admit she's weak, which Koreans hate doing, so it could work to your advantage.
That, or you could tell her to find someone who will take good care of the cat and love it as much as you do, and if she does, they can have it.
The only bad side to this is that no matter which of you wins in this, one of you is going to have a chip on your shoulder about it, and some deep-seeded passive resentment about it. People don't forget stuff like this.
Good luck.
edit: Forgot to mention: Is she smokin' hot? Like Lee Hyori levels? If so, ditch the cat. If she's humble looking, meh. |
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piratebryan
Joined: 21 Feb 2008
Location: Nonyeon
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:06 am Post subject: Re: Her or the cat... |
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| Louis VI wrote: |
| piratebryan wrote: |
| I'm an animal lover through and through... the cat is family. |
Then you know what has to be done: turf the girlfriend. You will be MUCH happier finding yourself a gal who at least moderately likes animals.
Note: There might be relationship power dynamics at play and if you put your foot down and draw the line at the cat, the girlfriend might realize she has to accept the pet. YOU don't need to break up with the girlfriend, make it her decision: accept your cat and you go together. It's a package deal. Accept both or neither. |
Honestly, I think that could very well be it. I don't deal very well in relationships that are forged with an ultimatum. I'm definitely a give and take kinda guy. I think the cat is just a symptom of some deeper problems we had. Not problems per se, but differences in personalities...I'm leaving on Saturday for a month vacation, maybe we need to stew on this relationship for a month. |
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Louis VI
Joined: 05 Jul 2010
Location: In my Kingdom
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:08 am Post subject: Re: Her or the cat... |
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| piratebryan wrote: |
| I'm leaving on Saturday for a month vacation, maybe we need to stew on this relationship for a month. |
Who is taking care of kitty?  Not the *beep*!! |
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RMNC
Joined: 21 Jul 2010
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:11 am Post subject: |
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| "Oh... your kitty... he not make it..." |
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piratebryan
Joined: 21 Feb 2008
Location: Nonyeon
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:19 am Post subject: |
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She is attractive. But beyond that, she has alot going for her. She's got her Masters, very secure in her company and rising rather quickly for her age (she's under 30 and their offering her a chance to run a language institute). She speaks perfect English, while only spending a year and a half in grad school in the states.
I, on the other hand, am nicely situated above average. Nothing spectacular but I have my moments. And a cat with abandonment issues. |
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piratebryan
Joined: 21 Feb 2008
Location: Nonyeon
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| Posted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:20 am Post subject: Re: Her or the cat... |
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| Louis VI wrote: |
| piratebryan wrote: |
| I'm leaving on Saturday for a month vacation, maybe we need to stew on this relationship for a month. |
Who is taking care of kitty? Not the *beep*!! |
Nah, roommate. I could imagine that phone call once I jumped off the plane
her, "Baby, your cat is gone"
me, "I hate you" |
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