Korean Job Discussion Forums

[GreenlightmeansGO]

My wife and I were walking home when I noticed a car on the opposite side of the road stop, and the window rolled down. I looked at the driver, then he rolled up the window. We hadn't walked 5 metres and he wound down the window again.

He pulled off, and I thought it was a bit weird the way it happened, but at least it was over...until I saw the same car coming back up the road, on our side.

At the corner, we turned towards our building, and I noticed the car was in the lane to go straight...then he suddenly changed lanes and proceeded to drive slowly up behind us, pulling up next to us and keeping pace with us as we walked.

Eventually we got to the crosswalk, but it was red for us and green for traffic...but the car still stopped at the lights, just sitting there.

Thinking it would be best to get away from the guy as quickly as possible, I took my wife and we walked behind the car, dodging traffic on the other side of the road as we crossed it.

Still, the guy sat there, moving slowly as we walked. I knew it would do no good, but I told my wife to call the police. While we stood there (outside a restaurant, with people inside), he remained, not moving, for about 2 minutes, but eventually pulled off.

I would think that would be the end of it, but we were less than a minute from our house, and if this guy ever waits around, he is bound to see my wife or I, and I am scared what someone like this could do to my wife if I am not around (or even if I am around - I have no idea how many people were in that car or what their intentions were).

What can I do? I have the license plate number, but I don't know what good that will do. I want my wife to put it on the internet, for some netizen justice, but in Korea we could very possibly be sued for that.

[McGenghis]

A similar thing happened to me and my father about two weeks ago out in the Gyeonggi-do countryside. We were walking along some irrigation dikes in the remote hinterlands when a car drove past and stopped about 20 yards ahead. The driver got out and stood by his car, smoking (and fuming) as my father and I walked slowly past. Then, as we proceeded to through a small tunnel under a highway, he got back into his car, and followed us slowly the length of the tunnel.

I wanted to give the guy the benefit of the doubt. I wanted to think that he was only driving slowly behind us because he didn't want to noisily pass us in a confined tunnel. So, upon exiting the tunnel, I pulled my father off to the side to let the man pass. He did. Then STOPPED again about 20 yards away. We had to awkwardly walk past him again and I directed my meanest glare into the opaque driver's window. He stayed there for a minute then pulled ahead and drove off.

Five minutes later we pass the guy again as he is parked outside some warehouse, smoking and glaring at me and Dad. It was one of the few times in my life where I felt my adrenaline surge to a point where I was either going to toss the guy into the river or pound on his window a bit. Fortunately, we just continued walking and came to a rather busy road. Very unnerving, OP.

[West Coast Tatterdemalion]

Were they wearing black suits?

[decolyon]

Don't call the police. Go to a regional police office (Gu office.) Demand to see someone with authority (don't take your wife, it will only cause her to lose face.)

Make a big scene. Raise your voice, bang a table, point a few fingers... really play up the "crazy mad foreigner" bit. There will be other civilians there. To avoid looking like they don't give a crap about their job and to get you out asap, they will leap into action. They will take on the appearance of "we are diligently doing everything we can to accommodate this troubled foreigner" routine and expedite you through filing the claim and might even send a beat cop to the guy's house to interview him. Make sure you express how unsafe and in danger you feel that this person could harm you or your family at any time (stress "family" instead of "me and my wife", or stress "kids" if you have any.)

Something will get done with the tactic and it may even freak the guy out enough he avoids you at all costs.

Now, the belligerent foreigner bit shouldn't be overused or abused, but it is a handy tool to use in Asia for Western people. It works even better if you wear a suit and are clean cut when you use it, as that looks like you are otherwise a successful, well adjusted person, who do to the failure of the person or group you are using the tool on, has been sent over the edge. It actually reflects more poorly on them than it does you. Of course you lose some face, but they will lose more as it appears that they are incapable of satisfying an otherwise successful person. Therefor, they have to work much harder publicly to retain any ground you just caused them to lose. It's a lose-lose situation, but they're the bigger loser.

Mind you, this routine usually only works on public servants. The police, government officials, etc. As they are there to serve you and you have obviously not been served adequately. It does not work for private sector as well. As a business owner would be more likely to return your harsh nature with even greater aggression to show that he can not be pushed around.

Asia culture. It's deep man.

[Radius]

[Jane]

If it happens again, pull out your phone and conspicuously take photos of the dude and his car. At least then you have something to show the police.

[GreenlightmeansGO]

I thought about taking a video as soon as I got home (too late, I know). However, take into account the fact that I had no idea who was in the car - could have been one guy or many. If they were up to no good and saw me recording a video for evidence, he/they could feel more compelled to follow through with whatever he/they wanted to do originally or to attack me and take the phone.

I didn't approach the car because I had no idea what was waiting inside.

[Radius]

[cert43]

What was your wife wearing? Maybe they were trying to pick her up..anyways, sorry that is terriable.

[Jeonmunka]

Look, I'm a little guy but I agree with Radius.
For the protection of your wife, you do that sort of stuff.
It's actually quite fulfilling because you gain face, in front of your wife, and with that wierdo following you.

I confronted a crazy guy and we nearly, nearly fought in the street. Few times I came close to a fight in Korea but inn many cases I didn't have the right to strike someone because we are all different etc etc. It is not worth it to fight over trifles. But, you could make your point a bit stronger than running away.
However, it is interesting and I reckon, too that that guy in the car was a scaredy. I say that because he just seems pimpy. He was the creep and he knew it. Cars are good to confront because the driver has to protect his car as well as himself. That said, I wouldn't take on two people ina car, that is silly as you are outnumbered.
But, in your case, just one guy, you are protecting your wife, so it makes you stronger in the case of dealing with the law and you might get onlooker support.
Also, as seen, even when you are anxious about an impending fight, even tempers flying may not mean an actual fight. 19 times out of 20 pple avoid the scene.
Kicking the car door would have been a wise move when confronting that man. Because it makes a strong noise ... makes you sound super tough even with a light kick.

[cert43]

Does your wife travel alone? Do you think he would try to abduct her?

The act of just following someone seems like a pretty harmless act in itself. , so I wouldn't go kicking him just yet.

[NYC_Gal 2.0]

[cert43]

Yes indeed.; think it is more fear-based though.

Anyways, How are you these days?!

[catman]

Was followed by a car in a small Korean city once. He finally pulled up beside me, rolled down his window and asked me if I could work at his hagwon.

[northway]