Korean Job Discussion Forums

[kimiki]

One day this week a kid basically assaulted me. One of the youngest students I have, and new by comparison in the class, a little bear of a boy who is quite large and loud and seems driven by a little motor of cunning mischief. We were singing a song & doing a dance, moving freely about the room. He caught me at one point with my back turned and pushed me hard with both hands, so much that I almost fell over. I turned around and couldn't be sure who it was, though I suspected him, of course. I stopped the music, asked the class who it was, no one came forward. Everyone looked shocked and silent. The other students were really enjoying the game, so I perhaps foolishly decided to do the song one more time, after getting agreements from all to 'be good.' Once again, he managed to get behind me and this time punched me windmill style a good 4 or 5 times. It was easy then to discover the culprit.

I reprimanded him, but it made little impact, til after I told the head Korean teacher, who apparently counts as an actual human being to him because he listened very closely to her and actually displayed guilt and remorse in his expression after getting a talking to. They did not strike him however, although they routinely strike kids with a long hitting stick for various offences in our school!! & generally presented an attitude of it was not being something to dwell on or be effected by.

Honestly I had put it out of my mind and forgotten about it but I noticed some negative feelings I couldn't shake in the last 48 hours... when I got in touch with them, I realized I'm bothered by it more than I admitted before. He really just attacked me, like he was just waiting for the chance, I did not have my back turned for more than 1.5 seconds, I am quite sure, and he came at me with all the force his little body could muster.

Has this ever happened to anyone else? Or have you heard of K-students assaulting teachers ever? Probably not, I imagine. And wouldn't there be more serious results if a kid did this to a Korean teacher?? Upsetting. I dread seeing his devilishly cute chubby face again. Please offer any wisdom you may have on how to deal with aggressive students.

[OneWayTraffic]

Have him straight in the corridor.

I used to get dongchimed, but only once.

[jlb]

I had a student at a hagwon once that seemed like she was the daughter of satan. She was never physically violent but she turned nice, sweet students who I had good relationships with into kids who made my life hell. And she was the rudest person I've ever met.

I'd been at my hagwon for about 9 months when this all went down, and up until that point had had no major discipline problems. With this girl though, I talked to my boss and asked him to talk to her. I said that I'd give her one more chance and if she behaved herself, she could stay in the class. If she couldn't, then I was not teaching her and I would quit my job before I had to.

Anyway, the predictable ending. The talk with my boss happened, she came back into my class and was evil from the first minute. I went to my boss and told him that it was either her, or me, but one of us had to go. She was not back at the hagwon the next day. I heard from the Korean teachers that my boss called her mom into the office, and refunded her the monthly tuition and sent her on her way.

So if this this continues, I would talk to your boss and say, it's either me, or this kid. Perhaps he could switch to another class? Or be asked to leave the hagwon? But, I wouldn't do this more than once during your year-long contract. More than that, and it will just seem like you can't control your classes. It will cost your boss far more to replace you than she/he would lose in tuition from this kid.

[Ramen]

i would've employed the service of bigger kids

[Bruce W Sims]

In the West there is a way of dealing with behavior-disordered students and a system of referring such individuals to counseling for their mental or emotional problems. Assault, battery, manipulative behavior, asocial or anti-social behavior are unfortunate, but also symtomatic of deaper issues if not addressed.

With no other recourse you did exactly what you needed to do. Had your boss not respected your safety and your position as the teacher you would have been right to let the position go as such things tend to escalate without intervention.

So far, I have not told you anything you don't know. The reason I lay it out for you in print is that you need to let these words sink-in until you realize that I am telling you the truth. Why is this important? Because episodes such as the one that you have shared can fester over time and interfere with your ability to be fair and supportive with students.

You have had a couple of bad apples, but the blessing was that your supervisor supported you and you didn't have to deal with it by yourself. Now make sure you find time to debrief with some fellow teachers and keep it up until you can't stand to mention it one more time. Thats how you will know you have started to heal. FWIW.

Best Wishes,

Bruce

[Ramen]

[koreatimes]

This kid didn't target you, and since none of the other kids called him out when you asked, you are dealing with a classroom dynamic. Bullies tend to hide from teachers so they can continue their bullying.

Putting something up like a point system where everyone is the same "size" might be enough to encourage everyone to look at their actions. If you have more than 15 students, you might want to group them together into teams and reward the team who behaves the best.

[litebear]

[Julius]

[Ninja-Bees]

It was yesterday, that I almost wanted to lay-out a little kid. Please stick with me on this one, I was not in my right state of mind.

This boy is hyperactive as any child I have ever met. When he laughs, its maniacal. He makes all the other kids cry just because he is awake and has nothing better to do.

So, he makes this one little boy cry by kicking him. I take away a sticker and sternly tell him to not do it again. I pick up the little crying boy and ask him if he is okay. He accidentally bumps my face with his head. Seeing this as a good time to cheer him up, I feign that it hurt. He starts to laugh, all is going swimmingly, until I see the bully kid 'crying'.

I go to ask him why he is crying (I figure because he lost a sticker). He makes like he wants me to pick him up. I'm a sucker for crying kids (and they freaking know it). So, with a cup in his hand, I pick him up to console him. Here comes the maniacal laughter and he boxes the h*ll out of my ear. It was so hard, I got dazed. I dropped the kid and all the other kids were telling the bully, "No, don't do that!" I go to grab him, then collect a little bit of my wits and go for his sticker board instead. Oh, the things I did to that sticker board.

After I was satisfied that no one would be able to collect a sticker on that board. I turned to him very calmly and sternly told him don't hit teacher. He started to cry. I hate myself, but it kind of made me happy.

Just to let everyone know, he went to lunch in tears and came back laughing like nothing happened. I actually had to remind him about his sticker board and he took it with a smile.

So, the point to my rambling. I sometimes think the kids see us larger play mates, and some kids like to play rough. Its just sometimes part of the job. Just try to take it in stride.

[alistaircandlin]

The kid is just testing your boundaries. I suggest you might need to make clear what your boundaries are, and make sure their are some sort of consequences if your students overstep them.

This is just what children seem to do, in my experience. It's almost like an unconscious experiment that they are genetically compelled to conduct: what will Mr. or Miss J. Smith do, if I do x, y, or z.

If you don't make clear what your boundaries are, there will always be students who keep pushing to find out what they can do, and how much you will take. You've gotta draw the lines clearly.

[mycamaro]

Is this an elementary? Have your korean co-teacher tell his homeroom teacher. Demand that they call and tell his parents. Hagwon? Same thing, just minus a homeroom teacher. I'm not sure why the other kids didn't rat him out. That's usually the first thing that happens. Does he have that much better control of them than you?
I've done the suggestion a couple times in a year. Usually just if the kid said a swear word outloud to his friend in english. One of them came back to school with a fresh bruise on thier leg. ( 6th grader ) The news spread to the other kids real quick. So, everyone's behavior would get better. So naturally I learned that the parents are the best weapon for you. Truth is, I found this out early on. I taught a gifted english class, this one 6th grade boy who supposedly gave his homeroom teacher so much crap that she had to switch homerooms because of him the previous year. (He never gave me trouble because I let my classes know first thing about bad behavior) Anyway, the class subject was public speaking. I had them write their own top 5 fears in thier notebook. I specifically told them they didn't have to show me or anyone. Then showed them a ppt of America's top 10 fears. #1 public speaking.
End of class, I collected the worksheets that they knew I was taking at the end of class to grade. That kid wrote just 2 fears on his sheet. #1 mom #2 dad . . . .

[Julius]

[repeatpete]

walking the tightrope with an elephant on your nose............
I think I'd quite like to see that actually.
though, predictably, doubtless the elephant part would be 'waived' for those on F2/F4 visas. But then they'd claim that there is an inherent bias towards those who are 'perceived' as having a circus background and that they don't even get the chance to get on the tightrope and wear the leotard in the first place!

But then of course, they are free to go to other circuses whilst the poor old E2s are entirely beholden to their respective ringmasters. Then those who work as clowns would point out that tightrope/elephant balancers all have aids and take drugs.