Korean Job Discussion Forums

[ktkt2289]

So its 2 months before the end of my first year in Korea, working in a small hagwon. I thought I had a great relationship with my boss, even asking if I could renew if she was able to negotiate on the hours/pay. She said she would think about it, and came back a week later saying it was impossible. I said, "OK, fine, but please now write the reference letter." I need this for EPIK, and gave her the guideline.
She told me to wait until after Chuseok, so I did, and tonight, I asked again. She told me she didn't want to write it because:

She has been angry with me for one year.
She feels I broke the contract because I don't make all the materials she asks (she asks for a LOT of materials - I made 800 flashcards a couple of months back) AND because I don't clean the toilets

I asked her why she never told me she was angry with me, or upset, and she said she is too busy, or she forgot. Also, she says it it the Korean way to clean the bathroom in my personal time before class, which I didn't know, and was NOT stated in the contract, so I never thought to do it.

She told me maybe I have to leave Oct 10th, when my contract finish date is Nov 30th. Now I'm wondering if she's looking for a way out of flight home and bonus payment, because, although we're not best friends, I thought we were on ok terms.

She said I disregard her, and think I am boss and she is employer, although I never meant that way (which I told her). She said I am menace to her, by asking for reference letter.

PLEASE HELP

What do I do? How can I get a public school job, or any job, with a broken contract or no reference? I was so happy and oblivious to this anger she has obviously (?) been feeling. And now I am worried about my life.

She told me she will write a list of all the reasons I made her angry, and how I broke the contract.

I told her I was unaware of the way I made her feel, and I can't change the past, so how about I change now? If I start cleaning the bathrooms, and preparing materials quicker, and follow her word more closely?

She didn't respond. She wants me gone!!

HELP!!

PS I'm assuming I have to contact the labour board. How do I do this?

PPS I know its not just me. The foreign teacher before me left early in the contract, and the one before that is currently suing my boss.

[Los Angeloser]

Yes, you're assuming that she wants you gone and that you'll have to contact the labor board. No matter what don't react strongly to whatever she says. It sounds like you've been acting perfectly, keep it up. I'd tell her(in response to cleaning the toilet), tell her you don't go #2 or sit on the toilet seat(assuming you're male), use any toilet paper, nor do you ever miss(drip on the floor or toilet edge). You shouldn't tell her that, use some Clorox, mop, and get the floor wet, etc...just the smell will make her think you cleaned.

Of course you're assumption(s) could be correct they sound premature. She sure must be angry at many things if she forgets what or why you make her angry.

Take her out to eat and drink on a Friday after work, and pay! But don't go anywhere too expensive.

Don't expect a letter recommendation. you'll be lucky if she gives you a simple document that states you worked from this date to that date which is probably the only thing you're public school would write up for you after working with EPIK. She will not "recommend" you.

Departures at most hagwons don't usually go well, they think you're getting one over on them so they compensate by making life difficult(to say the least) during your last weeks/days. Smile no matter what and say hi when you arrive and bye when you leave each day. Make up a sob story as to why you don't want to sign another contract with them, start looking for another job and don't rely or wait on EPIK.

After you get paid, find a friend and stay with him/her between jobs or move into a gositel. I wouldn't move out of the place they've provided until you get paid your last months salary. Ask them when you're going to get paid but not until the last day of work. Good Luck!

[ktkt2289]

Thanks for responding.

I am female and my apartment is inside the same building as the hagwon, literally, the doors are next to each other. The toilet doors in the hagwon don't close properly, so I use my own bathroom when I need to go. It takes me 2-3 minutes, so the fact that I do that is not a problem. She thinks it is the "Korean" way to clean before class starts. Maybe it is, but she never told me/asked me to do it, so I never have. And shes waited until its almost time for me to leave to tell me about her issues with me.
I will contact the Labour Board tomorrow.
She said many reasons she is angry

- I don't make enough materials (she likes flashcards)
- I took a chair out of the hagwon without asking (when she asked where it was, and said I shouldn't have taken it, I returned it immediately)
-I treat her with 'disregard', and I asked her for an example, she couldn't tell me
-I teach a group of Moms, and one quit. She blames me, but the Mom couldn't speak basic and the others had a higher level of fluency, and we followed a basic grammar and writing book. She obviously found it too difficult, but instead of trying to resolve the problem with me, this is grounds to fire me?!

It states in my contract that she has to give me a warning, and put me on probation, before she has the right to fire me. Hopefully this will help me out.

[Los Angeloser]

I'm not sure why you would go to the labor office, what complaint do you have? Call them on the phone and talk to them, ask questions. If/when she doesn't pay you the labor office won't accept your complaint until about 14 days after you should've been paid. Which may have something to do with why your visa(E-2?) doesn't expire until 30 days after the contract ends.

I copied/pasted from another link below...

"dial 1350 and press 7. This will get you to an English speaking representative at the labour board. He/she will connect you with a labour board representative who specialises in your particular area (of complaint) and translate the conversation with you on the phone like a conference call. 1350 is a charged call from a cell phone although in my case there were no specialists available immediately so he called me back in about 10 minutes, hence, no charge."

[ktkt2289]

My complaint is that she wants to fire me one month before my contract ends, without cause. The causes she cites are not sufficient reason for immediate dismissal according to my contract, and any problem she has requires two warnings before she can legally fire me.
The biggest problem is the suddenness. I recently asked her to renew me, so I could stay on one more year. I was clearly oblivious to this hatred she has for me! So I never had a chance to improve whatever behaviour she finds so unsatisfactory.

[Los Angeloser]

Ignore her until she gives you a written warning and if she confronts you(Koreans don't like confrontations so I doubt she'll be in any hurry to do this) say that you forgot to talk to her about whether she was really serious or not about what she had said. When did this "firing talk" start and/or is this an everyday topic of discussion? Call the labor ministry, I included the number above but have your ARC or passport number with you. My contract is coming to an end soon too so my boss will have to come to me and I have no idea what they might say, it's not a good time for most people E-2's at this time. Your boss isn't sure about you, she's testing the waters.

[ktkt2289]

Today was the first I'd heard of it. I asked her before Chuseok for a reference letter which I need for EPIK. She said ask me again next week. That's today, so I sat down with the reference template and started waffling about business headers or business cards when she suddenly blurted that she basically hates me, and everything I've done for the past year...
I'm paraphrasing, but she looked at me with real hatred. I asked her to write down everything I had supposedly done to break the contract. She said she would.
I feel like I can't just ignore her, because she is also my landlady. So if October 10 rolls around and she kicks me out (and my dog), I am in real trouble.

[Los Angeloser]

If you've got a little cash saved up you'll be fine, you're not in trouble. Don't talk to her tomorrow about it unless she mentions it. Koreans change their minds sometimes each and everyday. Give her a piece of candy or fruit tomorrow afternoon. Oh, and don't put yourself in the same situation with a new employer, get your own place and have them pay you a rental allowance each month, should be 500 thousand won minimum.

Don't worry about the reasons she told/gave you for her anger at you. Just tell her you'll improve. You wouldn't believe all the reasons my hagwon bosses have given me in the past, it's not easy to let them go in one ear and out the other but try. The important thing is that you act like you care when talking about it with her but not outside of work(like now).

Don't tell her you're calling or going to the labor ministry!!!

[12ax7]

Do you know the term "mind f..."? That's what she's doing. Like others have said, you're not terminated until she gives you a written discharge notice.

[ktkt2289]

But I really want to avoid it coming to that. And its important I get some kind of reference for my next school. To be honest, if she wants me gone that bad, I'll go, but I feel like I've done nothing to justify losing my reference, letter of release, proof of teaching or whatever.

Not to mention she just basically ruined my entire positive experience in Korea.

[Los Angeloser]

Hey, it can get much worse believe me. Also don't tell her she just ruined...Smile and be cheerful. I was fired in the 10/11 month, everything was going fine until then. If I had reacted differently or didn't react perhaps things wouldn't have gone the way they did. But, I'm okay now and you will be as well.

Try to avoid her tomorrow as well, don't give her an opportunity to mention it if that's at all possible. Leave a note with that piece of candy/chocolate or fruit.

[ktkt2289]

So what did you do? Were you able to get a LOR to work at a different school, or did you have to go home?
And what note do you think I should leave her?

Hey, sorry you want to fire me - please eat some apples?

She has a difficult personality and a temper, so I certainly won't provoke a confrontation, but if she starts talking about me leaving, I don't know what to say. I tried to reason with her tonight, but she's not having it.

And about the mindf..., I don't know what her motivation would be, just to screw with me... to make me quit, so I end up breaking the contract?

[ontheway]

[ktkt2289]

I've talked about it to my family. They suggest I give her a letter, apologizing and asking for more discussion about what she wants me to do to complete my contract.
I also digged up my contract, and highlighted the reasons she can fire me, which include abuse of students, inappropriate conduct etc. and that maybe she can issue a warning and put me on probation, but cannot fire me because I accidentally insulted her.

Should I try to discuss this with her again? Or is it better to pretend it didn't happen, and wait to see her next move? Should I give her an apologetic letter?

Like I said, she is my landlord, so I don't want to end up out on the street suddenly.

[TheUrbanMyth]