Korean Job Discussion Forums

[casey's moon]

I just brought some �� and soymilk to my favourite neighbourhood �ҸӴ� to say goodbye as we're moving out this weekend. I left with way more than I gave her, and as the door closed she was still saying "�̾��ؼ� ���?" It definitely didn't give me the warm Christmasy feeling I was expecting!

I also gave our landlady a gift set and some homemade cookies, and she also said, "��� ���?"

I have more cookies for the real estate guy (did the most work but was cheated out of a commission because another real estate agency sealed the deal), my vet, and an ajumma who has been a friend to me for the last 6 months. My Christmas spirit will not be swayed.

But I wonder -- why is it so hard to give gifts in Korea? They are always giving gifts to me....

I'm no newbie or anything (sooo far from it, actually), but I really don't get what's going on here. Don't they know it is for my happiness and benefit as much as theirs?

Edited to add: The Korean in this story isn't really translatable to English, but the gist of it is that they didn't know how to react and felt the gift was a burden (but not nearly in so many words).

[djsmnc]

I've heard often that it is traditionally respectful to refuse a gift three times before accepting it. Some people will refuse to show their happiness but will return the favor later. It's a status thing really...or, maybe they just don't like rice cakes.

[FUBAR]

It's also Korean custom to give back a gift greater in value than the gift you have received. Last week, I gave a co-worker a tangerine. The next day he gave me back two tangerines. He does this with everything I give him.

[tommynomad]

I just delivered ���� gift bags to all the secretaries and to the woman who hired me. (I don't do xmas.)

The secretaries all said "thanks" and oohed and ahhed over the contents. The hiring woman said that I had made her day and that any amount of hard work is worth getting a gift "like this one."

Made me feel all warm & fuzzy.

[casey's moon]

The rest of my gift-giving went well too (got the Christmas fuzzies back myself ). I talked to my husband about the grandmother, and he said that she was probably very pleased, despite the "burden" or my generosity.

I love the orange story, FUBAR!

As for the refusing 3 times thing.... well, what have all the Koreans I've met during the last 4.5 years thought of me? I pretty much accept everything as soon as it's offered for fear of being rude! ���̱�...