Korean Job Discussion Forums

The Great Wall of Whiner · Joined: 24 Jan 2003 Location: Middle Land

When Koreans stare at you, what do you do and how do you feel about it?

For me, it usually depends on my moods. If I am in a foul mood....they get a few choice Korean words.

If I am in a pleasant, jovial mood, I strike up a conversation with them.

But many times they do not want to talk, double so in public. They would lose face for not being able to speak English and be embarrased they have to talk in Korean simply because their English is non-existant.

The odd time I get Korean English teachers staring at me. I flatter them with "Wow! Your English is so good!" and they seem happy to continue talking at a later date...

Cedar · Posted: Sat Jun 07, 2003 9:54 pm Post subject:

When I arrived here (Daegu) in 1996 the staring was more pronounced. There are more foreigners now, allover the country and people are becoming rather more and more adjusted to seeing different looking people. They still stare, yes, but not ALL of them, and not to the same degree.

At first it bothered me, I felt really self-conscious, even before coming to Korea I was the sort of person who if someone took a second look at me was immediately thinking "Oh sh-t I must have lipstick on my teeth" or whatever. Anyway, it's been good for me. As time has gone on I've learned to stop thinking about what or why or if other people are looking at me, and live my life exactly as I want to. Korea and the staring here has made me a stronger and more independent person than I was before.

Who cares if they stare, as long as I am doing nothing "wrong" (in my opinion, not their opinion) then it's not important! And I feel perfectly comfortable to stare at them... not necessarily the people staring at me, I mean cute babies, incredibly hot men, people in complete fashion victim outfits...

rapier · Joined: 16 Feb 2003

I've learned to hide behind sunglasses a lot, because I don't really enjoy being stared at. Often i'll just stare back until they look away, or make some silly gesture to wake them out of their gaze.
Ultimately i suppose i tolerate it, i guess i'd be the same if I hardly ever saw a foreigner.
The most annoying thing is that if you are walking around with a korean friend, particularly a girl, they get very nosey and start asking her intrusive questions about the two of you..I nearly got all angry in the kalbi-jee the other day, but I guess its usually just not worth it. If you reacted to everything, you'd be mad 90% of the time. And I'm aware that I probably misunderstand/ confuse a lot of things as well.

kylehawkins2000 · Joined: 08 Apr 2003

Depends who is going the staring really. Young attractive ladies? Hey I can dig it! Or sometimes it depends on the look they give you......is it a look or disdain? That ain't cool!

Anyways, I've found here in Seoul it's not a really big deal. In general I don't get that many stares. Down in Ulsan though it was a constant thing....and lots of people yelling out at you in the streets just becuase you're a foreigner. The novelty of it was cool for a bit but it gets old quick!h

waterbaby · Joined: 01 Feb 2003 Location: Baking Gord a Cheescake pie

The staring in Korea doesn't bother me at all. I've never felt it to be hostile or intrusive. But in China I did. I lived in a nowhere city of 6 million people and there were probably about 60 foreigners in town, maybe 30 teachers and some German businessmen.

A lot of people were seeing a foreigner (when they saw me) for the first in their lives! I literally stopped traffic (often it was bullock and cart) and had children openly gawp at me through shop windows for long periods of time until I left the shop.

The supermarket was the worst as people used to follow me around and watch what I was putting in my trolley. Once I counted 14 standing around my checkout watching as every item was scanned. I felt so violated. Icky.

How I loved riding on my motorcycle with my helmet on and my viser down. Momentary freedom. Until someone stole my motorcycle Rolling Eyes

HardyandTiny · Joined: 03 Jun 2003

These days Koreans quickly turn away when I catch them staring. Ever since last year's anti-western antics most Koreans seem ashamed to be caught staring at a foreigner. The older Koreans still stare and I consider it normal and usual give them a smile or a nod.
I find that many middle-aged men stare and when I say "anyong ha sa yo" and they say nothing in return. I usually yell again "ANYONG HA SAY YO?...aieeesh!"

jajdude · Joined: 18 Jan 2003

Yep the gawks have gotten to me at times for sure. In Seoul it's not bad, just a little, but sometimes still a bit unwanted, especially when in company of a young Korean woman. But the entire country is still just getting used to the outside world, even in Seoul. And in the boonies there are still lots of people with zero experience with the outside world. Never heard of Starbucks, couldn't find Mexico on the map, sort of like the Jaywalk Allstars on Jay Leno. And even in Seoul, even in a trendy bar where foreigners go regularly, say in Shinchon or Hongdae, you still encounter crap sometimes. Like a Korean guy, a total stranger, still sometimes will ask the Korean woman what she is doing talking to, or dancing with, that "way-guk in." Hard to believe, but I congratulate those who can handle the boonies or CHina or wherever. After two years in Seoul I recently did a stint in Suwon and taught in UiWang (where? exactly Wink

- actually little town between Suwon and Anyang). Man I can appreciate Seoul more now. The subway still can be yucky for the gawkers though, mostly the older crowd. And boy I am still amazed that any Korean is amazed whenever I manage to put a few Korean words together properly or actually understand their language. Well hey only about 4 years in this country. Yes, I know the numbers...

The Lemon · Joined: 11 Jan 2003

It's not so bad in Seoul, and the closer you get to downtown the less there is. Out in Kyonggi-do, near my in-laws home, the staring increases markedly.

Kwangju, however, is crazy-stare-land. It's worse than Seoul was in 1996. Yes, it bothers me. And now that I'm walking around with a pregnant Korean wife, the hostility and attitude levels have jumped through the stratosphere. Strangely, it's from older Koreans, who usually leave us alone.

OK - here's my joke: What do you call the Korean Air plane from Kwangju, on which you're the only foreigner?

Answer: A flight of stares.

Thank you very much.

crazylemongirl · Joined: 23 Mar 2003 Location: almost there...

I can live with it, however I don't like it when old guys staring at my chest or my legs if I'm wearing a skirt.

If the staring turns into adjumas stroking my hair/arms/hands then I get really annoyed.

Apart from that I've learned to turn a blind eye.

That said the first time I went to Itaewon, I stared at the african americans as I hadn't seen one before I got here except for on ricki lake.

CLG

weatherman · Joined: 14 Jan 2003 Location: Korea

Still interesting question after hearing it over and over again. I went to visit the city of Yeosu this weekend, and I was surpised at the amount of stares I get. I mean, I know I am a big goofy foreigner, but I felt they were more like "hey, over there is a foreigner! Why is he here?" type stares. After becoming an expert of being stared at (see Lemon's gwangju story), all I can say is that each situation has a different stare. The dudes at the bar stare, is a lot different than the grandmother stare at the market, and the highschool girls stares are a lot different than a vixen's stare. Its good and bad depending on situation and your mood. That said, I stare at them a lot these days too. Reflex action?

Leslie Cheswyck · Joined: 31 May 2003 Location: University of Western Chile

Alias · Joined: 24 Jan 2003

This is the one issue that I have really little sympathy with my expats for. Now, I'm not talking about hateful looks that me and my Korean girlfriend get. That's another topic.
I'm talking about the innocuous staring. Many of these people really haven't see foreigners before, except on TV. It is like an Asian person going to rural New Brunswick or Nova Scotia. They would get stared at too. Doesn't mean its hateful.

I actually like it when the little kids awk at me. Especially the toddlers. One little girl on the Subway saw me and stopped crying.
I've also noticed some Korean dogs stare at me. Confused

denz · Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2003 4:10 am Post subject:

lemon is bang on (as per), inner seoul is a cake walk. moreover, living in itaewon is fun - i only get stared at if it's 12 o'clock and the short time girls need a few ends.

nyet!

denz

Pyongshin Sangja · Joined: 20 Apr 2003 Location: I love baby!

Maybe I should start wearing pants more often.

whatthefunk · Joined: 21 Apr 2003 Location: Dont have a clue

One morning I was waiting for my hagwan to open and the old man that lives acroos the street came over, stood 6 inches from my face, and stared at me for 15 minutes. I tried to be nice at first, but he just kept staring. I yelled at him and moved from where I was sitting, but he just followed me around. He finally left...I don't know why...

I live in a very small town and Ive been here for 7 months, but I still get stares. It doesn't bother me so much anymore, but some days Im ready to explode at the people who seem to have no consideration for others and stare at you for what seems to be hours.