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Divorce procedure
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OneWayTraffic



Joined: 14 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Sat Apr 09, 2005 11:26 pm    Post subject: Divorce procedure Reply with quote

Does anyone here know how long it takes to process a divorce in Korea? What if one partner wants to do it now but the other would rather wait for a few months?
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Tiberious aka Sparkles



Joined: 23 Jan 2003
Location: I'm one cool cat!

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 12:15 am    Post subject: Re: Divorce procedure Reply with quote

OneWayTraffic wrote:
Does anyone here know how long it takes to process a divorce in Korea? What if one partner wants to do it now but the other would rather wait for a few months?


Are you male of female? Is your spouse a foreigner or Korean?

Sparkles*_*
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OneWayTraffic



Joined: 14 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 12:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm a foreign male married to a Korean woman. We have one daughter.
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Daechidong Waygookin



Joined: 22 Nov 2004
Location: No Longer on Dave's. Ive quit.

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 12:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Go to counselling. Try and save this mariage. I doubt you have exhausted all possibilities.
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mercury



Joined: 05 Dec 2004
Location: Pusan

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 12:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You are the 3rd guy this week who I found out is wanting a divorce from his Korean wife! One of my friends had this story, he is from Canada, his wife was an angel when they met, very beautiful, had a little girl, THEN the parents started bothering them, he said they were getting her on their side (whatever that means) anyways, he ended up totally stressed, his wife went psycho, always hounding him, so he told me he divorced her, he got custody of his daughter, AND now his wife keeps stalking him, coming back to his apartment, she is back to being an angel, but he is getting ready to move back to Canada.
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OneWayTraffic



Joined: 14 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 12:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I certainly want to save the marriage. I'm worried that my wife will take matters into her own hands. She wants to have the marriage ended by next month over a (admittedly serious) fight. I don't know how to distinguish between what she sys and what is really going to happen so I want to know if she can divorce me without my consent before we have a chance to reconcile.
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tzechuk



Joined: 20 Dec 2004

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 1:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Daechidong Waygookin wrote:
Go to counselling. Try and save this mariage. I doubt you have exhausted all possibilities.


Gosh... I agree with you, DW.

*must savour this moment*
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Daechidong Waygookin



Joined: 22 Nov 2004
Location: No Longer on Dave's. Ive quit.

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 1:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

tzechuk wrote:
Daechidong Waygookin wrote:
Go to counselling. Try and save this mariage. I doubt you have exhausted all possibilities.


Gosh... I agree with you, DW.

*must savour this moment*


Mariage is the most important thing in the world. There is a sanctity to marriage not found anywhere else.
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Gord



Joined: 25 Feb 2003

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 1:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

OneWayTraffic wrote:
I don't know how to distinguish between what she sys and what is really going to happen so I want to know if she can divorce me without my consent before we have a chance to reconcile.


I'm far from the expert on all things legal about divorce in Korea, but she does not need your consent to end the marriage under Article 840 of the Korean Civil Act if any of the following have happened:

1. act of unchastity, 2. malicious desertion. 3 4. extreme maltreatment, 5. death or life of the spouse is unknown for three years and 6. any other serious cause for making it difficult to continue the marriage.

Though historically these generally only apply against men from abandoning women who would otherwise be highly unemployable. The courts have been much more favorable in granting divorces at the request of the Korean wife with a foreign husband even in the marked absence of anything negative and the claims she just wants to marry a Korean man.
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tzechuk



Joined: 20 Dec 2004

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 1:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

OneWayTraffic wrote:
I certainly want to save the marriage. I'm worried that my wife will take matters into her own hands. She wants to have the marriage ended by next month over a (admittedly serious) fight. I don't know how to distinguish between what she sys and what is really going to happen so I want to know if she can divorce me without my consent before we have a chance to reconcile.


OK.. here is what I understand to be the divorce procedure.

1. you go to your local court and get 3 separate pieces of paper. Fill them out and (a) for a quick divorce, both parties sign them; or (b) for a long drawn out divorce, one party signs them and wait for the court hearing.

2. in the case of (a), you appear before a judge, he (or she, but probably a he) asks if you have both made up your mind. If you say yes, then he signs the papers, puts a stamp on and you are divorced.

The next step will be to go to your gu-chong and get it recorded in your wife's ho-jock-dong-bun to formalise it.

3. in the case of (b), you appear before a panel of judges and or counsellors. They ask you to reconsider your wishes, since one party does not really want to divorce. They ask you questions about why you want to divorce and see if there's any way you can reconcile. You then have a certain amount of time to consider what is said and try to see if you CAN reconcile. This period of time usually involves one partner living outside home. A *cooling off* period, so to speak.

If you reconcile, then no need to go through with the divorce, obviously.. But if after this cooling off period, you still decide to go ahead with the divorce, then 2 is repeated.

However, if one party still doesn't want to divorce, then 3 is repeated. I am not sure how many times. And I am not sure how long a separation needs to be for a one-sided divorce either...

In any case.. I agree with DW... go for couselling and see if you can work something out. Onuri Church in Yoido has a marriage counsellor, I believe.

Good luck.
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OneWayTraffic



Joined: 14 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 3:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks for the support and information guys. The problems have been at least 50% my fault although I'm not going to go into them in a public forum. Having a wife who idealised me while we were dating didn't actually help much as the reality may have fallen short of her expectations. I want to make this work; if I can.
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PolyChronic Time Girl



Joined: 15 Dec 2004
Location: Korea Exited

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 4:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Again...agree with the counselling. If you had a blowout...try to reconcile. It definitly seems as you need counselling but she (as some Koreans do) feel seeing counselling as a little shameful. Try to persuade her. Understand that if you divorce in Korea, you are not yet divorced in your country as you are married under the laws of your country and your embassy doesn't deal with this matter...but they can probably get you list of lawyers who speak English to help with child custody issues. If you proceed with the divorce..you must get the korean divorce decree translated into English by a lawyer in order to proceed with the divorce in your country....sorry, that's all I know.
I'm sorry you are going through a difficult time....if you want to talk more personally...you can always PM me. I really hope things work out between you two. Just remember that international marriages take lots of work and sometimes you, your wife, and her parents can have cultural misunderstandings.
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Deconstructor



Joined: 30 Dec 2003
Location: Canada

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 5:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Daechidong Waygookin wrote:
Mariage is the most important thing in the world. There is a sanctity to marriage not found anywhere else.


Anyone who writes a conservative claptrap like the quote above is the first person you should never listen to.

In your case, if she doesn't want to be with you, then there isn't much you can do about it. You can try to sit down and talk about it calmly and rationally, but ultimately if she wants out then so do you.
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Derrek



Joined: 15 Jan 2003

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 5:56 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Deconstructor wrote:
Daechidong Waygookin wrote:
Mariage is the most important thing in the world. There is a sanctity to marriage not found anywhere else.


Anyone who writes a conservative claptrap like the quote above is the first person you should never listen to.


Wow... only Conservatives care about marriage? Gee, so now we can pin it all on Liberals... thanks!

Hey, DW... you're a conservative now!
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crazylemongirl



Joined: 23 Mar 2003
Location: almost there...

PostPosted: Sun Apr 10, 2005 6:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think perhaps you want to get in touch with a lawyer. Perhaps get in touch with your embassy or the foreigner help line 1330 as they always have a list of english speaking lawyers

Side rant*:
I don't think that it's right for people to diss the OP about his decisions, it's his life. He asked what the procedures are and if people suggest a few other options that's cool but in the end he has to live his life and it's up to him how he can do this in a way that makes him happy.

If you want to do a discussion on the sanctity of marriage start a damn thread this isn't the place.

* these views don't reflect the mod team.
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