Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Bloopity Bloop]

Until this year, I've never taught or dealt with young children since I myself was a young child (just kidding AES teehee, I am very qualified). I graduated and came here.

I now work at a public elementary school and have a 6th grade student who, maybe until today, I just could not understand. She has terrible eyesight yet never brings her glasses to class. Doesn't really matter because all she does is draw and stare at her desk. She is, however, actually one of the more popular kids in school and has a good number of friends so it's not like she's just one of those introverted, loner types. I don't really know how to explain her strange ways, but she just doesn't act like your typical sixth grader. She gives away whatever prizes/snacks she wins immediately. She acts COMPLETELY withdrawn in class even when her most withdrawn peers are into the current lesson or game, but complains when there aren't any games. Whenever I call on her and she answers correctly, she says, "I am genius I am god". I feel like I can at least connect at some level with all the other students I see regularly--I have a REALLY small school and see many kids 6 or 7 times a week in class (morning + afternoon), but I just can't with her at all. Oh yeah, and she likes to be called bear... :/

Anyway, this morning, I finally got sick of her inattention and took away her typical "classwork"--any writing utensils and paper that she had. After class, my co-teacher started talking to her and she just started crying about how she hates her mom because her mom won't give her new glasses. Apparently, she hates her current pair, which is why she never brings them to class.

I thought something might be happening at home to cause her strange behavior (I didn't explain it well, but she seriously does not act like any other student I have met), but found out for sure today that it is indeed some domestic strife.

So I'm wondering if you think kids are really that simple or are they complicated? Have you guys had any similar experiences in terms of kids you just could not connect with and how do you deal with them? My energy level really does not match elementary school students, probably should have gone to high school. But I refuse to become a completely jaded teacher, at least for now and would like to positively impact all my kids.

[Goku]

She's extremely intelligent.

She gives you back prizes because she knows that accepting them are a sign of neediness. She doesn't need the prizes. She's acting like "I have everything already why would I need your lame-o gifts".

When she clamors for games she does it for the benefit of other students, not herself. She is "representing" the class and she actually doesn't care of your games. She gains popularity because she acts like a president, representing the people if you will.

She is disinterested because.... well I don't know. Maybe your classes are boring. Or maybe she does it on purpose. I highly doubt she's SO intelligent to know about how to elicit popularity with the disinterested persona... man she'd be thousands of years ahead of her peers.

Sounds like she says I'm a genius or I'm a god, to establish her social status. Or at least to get a few cheap laughs.

She has a social intelligence above your other kids. I'm not exactly sure how or why she learned it so fast... but I'd be careful of her.

The domestic problem at home... well that just SHOWS how selfish yet intelligent she is. She refuses to wear the glasses because she knows if she holds out long enough and creates problems in school. Her mother will inevitably be FORCED to buy her the new glasses she wants. The domestic strife is also evidence that she is a hard child to deal with.

Stubborn children know that if they bully and are non-compliant they can get more of what they want.

Oh Ho ho ho....

For this kind of girl, winning her favor wouldn't be easy. She is more focused on popularity than anything else. Or at least by your forum post that seems to be her thing.

There is probably nothing you can do to win her. Unless....

You buy my consultation on how to be charismatic.

Only for a short time, in limited supply! Just 5 million won!
And I'll thrown in a free vat of Kimchi. Limited time offer, order now!

[aboxofchocolates]

Kids are as complicated as any other person, and even more so because they haven't learned to decode their own emotions. She may hate her mother, she may hate her glasses. She may have a learning disability and is using glasses as an excuse because she can't articulate her real problem. Does she like speaking and listening activities? Maybe she's so far behind the other students she'll be embarrassed to admit she knows so little, and so doesn't participate. Usually there's a pretty good reason behind kid antics, but they can be hard to figure out. Unsolicited advice:

Don't call her out in front of students. If she's doing some attention seeking stuff, you'll just be giving her what she wants. If she's not doing the work you asked her to, she's probably afraid to let her friends know she can't do it. If she's not writing, she probably can't write, so pair her up with some kids who can. Preferably someone who is too shy to speak, so they can feed off each other. Encourage her to try, but don't get too worked up if she doesn't do anything. Praise her evenly and appropriately for what she did do, and don't make her stand out (she'll hate that).

Oh, and don't suck up to her if you want to get along with her. Suck up to her friends. If they like you then she'll want to like you too. Just praise them for their good work and joke with them every now and then. And get them to help out with handing out papers and stuff. Just don't forget the other kids who are good at blending in as you go.

[aboxofchocolates]

[Burndog]

[KOREAN_MAN]

Why don't you try to talk to her mom? Tell her that her daughter is not wearing her glasses, and because of that, she's not learning anything in class. I'm sure once you meet her mother a whole lot of stuff will be explained.

[soakitincider]

More complicated than most of will ever know. They can sense how you feel about them and their behavior will be a direct reflection of that sensation. So act accordingly.

[andrewchon]

I have one 6th grade girl who is smart but is withdrawn and won't speak because her father is physically abusive .
I have 5 other kids who are like snails because their fathers are abusive drunkards.
Five kids who are ADD, one brain-damage, one clinically retarded, 3 who are prone to crying. Here, it's a bit hard to tell whether one is mental case or just 'coping' without reading their pers-files.
To top it all, school's top ranked student suffers mood-swings.

I blame the high-tension power-lines next to the school.

[tfunk]

Learn to leave her alone and then you'll have solved the problem of you losing energy/patience in class.

There are a thousand possible causes for her behavior and most of them you can't do anything about. What you do have power over is the ability to change your own reaction.

If you show that you care for her and respect her then she might open up, slowly. If that doesn't work, try something else but don't push her.